My Mom just bought me a matress protector.

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by Keniff, Apr 7, 2010.

  1. Keniff macrumors 6502a

    Keniff

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  2. dmr727 macrumors G3

    dmr727

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    #2
    Supposedly it helps with allergens and bed bugs.

    Or maybe she's just worried you'll wet the bed.
     
  3. Keniff thread starter macrumors 6502a

    Keniff

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    #3

    ahh s h 1 t....!!
    so thats why she bought it for me....
     
  4. Rockin' Kat macrumors newbie

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    Kent, WA
    #4
    I recall when I bought my mattress I was told that the warranty would be voided if it got stained by anything, bodily fluids, juice, soda, etc... is your mattress a new one? Considering how expensive a new mattress is it's not that bad an idea if the warranty can be voided so easily.
     
  5. yayitsezekiel macrumors 6502a

    yayitsezekiel

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    #5
    it just helps keep the mattress clean. also yeah like the above guy said, it helps keep the warranty longer
     
  6. Tower-Union macrumors 6502

    Tower-Union

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    #6
    I don't have a source for this but I've been told the human body sweats, or releases roughly a cup of sweat per night. Between that and skin cells and such its probably wise to keep something there to protect your matress.
     
  7. roadbloc macrumors G3

    roadbloc

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    #7
    You obviously went through too many of these...

    [​IMG]
     
  8. arkitect macrumors 601

    arkitect

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    #8
    Not so much what it does (I'd have thought the clue lies in the words mattress and protector) but more to the point that Mom is trying to tell you that, well,
    "Keniff, you're a big boy now, and while laying the new mattress we discovered your little crusty rag… so before you go ruining our brand new mattress investment, we'd rather you sleep on this."
    Oh, the embarrassment.
    Luckily they haven't yet broached the issue of the splattered wall/headboard. That's probably being kept for Saturday's family breakfast. Which is a bit of a bind, as on the one hand you'd feel kind of chuffed that you could manage it, while on the other, oh mortification…
    ;)
     
  9. rdowns macrumors Penryn

    rdowns

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    #9
    Maybe she was just tired of seeing the results of your happy endings.
     
  10. tooz macrumors 6502

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    Jul 21, 2009
    #10
    You just got avril lavigne stuck in my head. Thanks.:rolleyes:


    On topic, it's basically there to stop skin cells, sweat, etc.
    i.e. keep the mattress clean
     
  11. theLimit macrumors 6502a

    theLimit

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    #11
    Avril always gives me a happy ending! :eek:
     
  12. tooz macrumors 6502

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    #12
    and that is exactly why a mattress protector is needed!
     
  13. toolbox macrumors 68020

    toolbox

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    #13
    LoL nuff said there lol
     
  14. Abstract macrumors Penryn

    Abstract

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    #14
    I thought that's what bedsheets were for.

    What's going to protect the mattress protector?
     
  15. Queso macrumors G4

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    #15
    Some fluids easily soak through ordinary sheets :)
     
  16. erickkoch macrumors 6502a

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    #16
    I'm wondering if the two kids on the picture knew what they were posing for.
     
  17. themoonisdown09 macrumors 601

    themoonisdown09

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    #17
    They look a little too old to be wetting the bed.
     
  18. H00513R macrumors 6502a

    H00513R

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    #18
    Yep, they are good for allergens/sweat/etc. My only other thought is did you get caught with a girl recently?? :p
     
  19. Disc Golfer macrumors 6502a

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    #19
    It's like there's a church on the south end of town with a big sign outside with a photo of a woman and a caption that reads, "I Regret My Abortion". Though many feel it would be more accurate to read "I Regret Posing For Stock Photography".
     
  20. eawmp1 macrumors 601

    eawmp1

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    #20
    Bwahahahaha - it takes either supreme stupidity, a self-deprecating sense of humor, or massive cajones to post a thread like this. :cool:
     
  21. Elixer macrumors regular

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    Aug 15, 2006
    #21
    On Dirty Jobs there was an episode about dirty mattresses. They said that used ones weight significantly more than new ones because of dead skins cells. :)
     
  22. jtara macrumors 65816

    Joined:
    Mar 23, 2009
    #22
    Bedsheets don't have a rubberized, impenetrable layer. Make sure it's a nice one that has a nice soft feel to it. It's worth the extra money.

    You can also get similar protectors for pillows. They're touted to people who have allergies, so you can have your goose-down pillow and still breathe. More an issue with pillows than with mattresses.

    In addition to the obvious and not so obvious reasons cited here, the occasional illness or injury which we all encounter can be messy and doesn't help to keep a mattress fresh and nice.

    If you really want to impress mum with your new-found expert knowledge on bedding, make sure to flip and rotate the mattress 4 times a year. This will also help divert her attention from whatever unspeakable hazards she may have had in mind and focus instead on her successful installation of a sense of compulsive and ritual tidiness...
     
  23. Melrose Suspended

    Melrose

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    Dec 12, 2007
    #23
    They look a little too old for diapers.
     
  24. theLimit macrumors 6502a

    theLimit

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    #24
    I wet the bed until I was fifteen. :(
     
  25. Queso macrumors G4

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    Mar 4, 2006
    #25
    It could be said I still do at 38 (only with different fluids :D)
     

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