I don't really have many issues as you do apparently but you do realize that Apple does still sell a
full size keyboard. I definitely don't miss a full size keyboard with number pad.
The only thing I really miss are the cup inward shape of most keyboards. Apple's current keys are flat which causes me to sometimes hit the key on the edge instead of in the center of the keys. When there is cup indention it's easier to hit the center of the keys based on feel. It's not a major issue because I'm typing fine without it but I didn't notice this issue the first time I typed on these keyboards.
IMO the best keyboard is still my PowerBook G4. It's the most comfortable keyboard I've ever used and I can type really fast with it. I've used many keyboards in the past so I'm not just saying that lightly. Of course, everyone's opinions will vary but that's my favorite keyboard. It does have black keys so that's one plus for you.