The right thing to do at this point would be to release it officially. The horse has left the barn, people with iPhones are downloading and upgrading. Maybe not the general public, but quite a few people are.
Yes, because heaven knows Apple have nothing else to do today...
Look, you need to understand how releases on this scale work. Apple will have a plan in place, complete with a LOT of alterantive scenarios, as to how, when and where everything launches over the next few days. On a very basic level it would cover MobileMe, iTunes 7.7, iPhone 3G, iPhone firmware 2.0, iPod Touch firmware 2.0 and the App Store. This is not a small undertaking, especially as most of these require downloading in some way shape or form. Contingency plans will be in place to handle any problems that occur (see MobileMe for example) up to and including full rollbacks.
Now in the case of iPhone and iPod firmware I would expect Apple to have scheduled a suitable chunk of time where they will have maxed out their support presence, have an arrangment in place with their bandwidth provider to increase their bandwidth for a time if required, ensured that it won't conflict with any other priority that may be around (again, at the moment, I'd suspect any crisis response resource is currently busy on MobileMe) and bumped up their customer support team as well. On top of this you also need to have resource available to handle any problems that occur with App Store as it's going to get hammered the instant 2.0 goes live.
Honestly, if I were Apple, I'd see no reason to rush release 2.0, or even to have it out before the new iPhone launches. The pre-requisite isn't the firmware, it's iTunes 7.7 and the changes to MobileMe. Those are both out and, hopefully, the issues with MobileMe will be sorted out by the time the big launches roll round (Europe and America mostly). Then let all the shiny new iPhones connect up, register, download all the free apps etc BEFORE letting everyone else upgrade. That's the safest path for a smooth rollout and gives them a small (relativley anyway) test base in the form of the 3G iPhone users to find any flaws. If they in fact let us existing owners upgrade at the same time then I'm actually quite impressed and REALLY want their bandwidth budget!
Basically you need to think about these things from a global perspective and not your own personal one. And to intercept the other whine about why they didn't launch 2.0 days ago, you have to remember it's a linked product to MobileMe, App Store, iTunes etc and in that case every day you can put on testing and preparation is a bonus. So long as everything's in place for new users on the 11th then all is well.