I have been using the adapter with Bose QCs and I know what you mean. There is not enough side tone. At first it bothered me so much that I would just slide my headphone slightly off my ears and it sounded much better, recently I have forgotten to do this and have long calls with it not bothering me anymore, although I may be talking too loudly then.
Last night I also found myself talking to loud and the person i was speaking with heard tremendous background noise (I was in a Star-bucks in an airport), while I heard nothing but my caller. I heard no background noise and hardly myself (still a problem). So it seams like the mic does not transfer any sound to the earphones. I really don't like it, but will use it (and hopefully get used to it) as it is convenient to still have on the Bose QC-3's from being on the plane and then just being able to start talking without changing to the iPhone earbuds (even though i carry these and use only these when not having to use the QC-3 like while in airplanes/airports.