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Steve Wozniak asks to cut in line @ Apple Store
- Thread starter djrayz
- Start date
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Truth is it's hard to say, Woz was responsible for the Danger Hiptop (he founded Danger Inc), better known as the T-Mobile Sidekick. When the iPhone rumors started to fire up he bailed from Danger, need I take a guess why?
First, and I can't believe all you experts didn't notice this, but those photos are clearly photoshop fakes... and not very convincing ones at that! My 83 year old Grandmother can even tell they're fakes and she's been dead going on TEN (count em) TEN years now!
Second, please don't tell me that with ten+ pages of replies not one single person has brought up the fact that (just like Paul McCartney) Steve 'The Woz' Wozniak died over 25 years ago... twenty nine to be exact... If you take the time to look it up, you will see reports of an 'Airplane Accident' that the Woz was involved in... It was widely reported and accepted that the Woz survived the accident... but insiders know the deep dark truth...
...Woz is Dead...
If you want to read about the 'reported' incident... Go ahead, its on wikis in almost any language you like but what I'm about to tell you now... will never be found in a wiki not for very long anyway.
In the shock of the moment, Steve Jobs not knowing what would become of the company he and Woz founded... There were banks and stockholders to answer to not to mention the employees and the public at large!
Steve, with the help of the board of directors had to act and act quickly! The combed the campuses far and wide but couldn't find anyone who could even remotely pass for Woz... Then when all hope was lost, they found a guy camping out on the street waiting in line to buy some Grateful Dead tickets and ... well... the rest is history.
Steve, out of guilt has even planted little hints in various products both hardware and software about this entire dark and twisted episode in the history of Apple...
Some of the more famous and and easy to find hints include:
The startup sound used on the very first Mac sold just 3 short years after 'the incident' when played in reverse and slowed down by a factor of 4 will sound a bone chilling 'I buried woz' in what is unmistakably Steve Jobs own voice. When confronted with this years later... Steve said.. I didn't say 'I buried woz' I said 'I bettered woz'.... Since I knew then that my leadership over the creation of the Mac was head and shoulders better than the Apple computer woz kluged together and wanted to make it known!
Serial numbers on the 78 models of a special (very) limited edition run of the now famous Macintosh were 32IF00001-32IF00078... The 32IF of course a clear nod to The Woz, that had he not died he would have been 32 years old. What made them special was the fact that the cases were 24k gold and diamond studded.
All were gifted to the board of directors and others involved with this coverup. A nurse know now only as 'Nurse X' who was on staff at the hospital at the time Woz was rushed in to the emergency room fell on some hard times and tried to sell the Macintosh with the 'unique' serial number on ebay... Shortly after the listing was made it was sold on Buy Out and the ebay account of the seller was closed permanently... The whereabouts of Nurse X? One has to wonder...
The black apple letterhead and business cards... Jobs, being quite full of himself didn't actually like the fact that this Woz stand in actually came to the company and worked (or pretended to anyway). So, to show this stand in who's the top dog, Jobs had all the business cards, letterhead and other printed items with the Apple logo printed in all black. Instead of the vibrant and colorful logo everyone else got to use.
A few years later an enterprising reporter brought up this little tidbit a stockholders meeting.. Jobs attempted to dismiss it by saying, "the printer simply ran out of colored inks.... Next!". That reporter can also be found on the national missing persons list.
More... yea there's LOTS more... but I'll leave it an exercise for the reader to find the others.
Anyway... to think all those people in line getting duped by this 'Woz Wannabe' and all you forum defenders... Cracks me up... Had you only known then what you know now.
Wait one sec... I think someone's at the doo$*($)^%^*G() %FH*()CN()$(*&%
Second, please don't tell me that with ten+ pages of replies not one single person has brought up the fact that (just like Paul McCartney) Steve 'The Woz' Wozniak died over 25 years ago... twenty nine to be exact... If you take the time to look it up, you will see reports of an 'Airplane Accident' that the Woz was involved in... It was widely reported and accepted that the Woz survived the accident... but insiders know the deep dark truth...
...Woz is Dead...
If you want to read about the 'reported' incident... Go ahead, its on wikis in almost any language you like but what I'm about to tell you now... will never be found in a wiki not for very long anyway.
In the shock of the moment, Steve Jobs not knowing what would become of the company he and Woz founded... There were banks and stockholders to answer to not to mention the employees and the public at large!
Steve, with the help of the board of directors had to act and act quickly! The combed the campuses far and wide but couldn't find anyone who could even remotely pass for Woz... Then when all hope was lost, they found a guy camping out on the street waiting in line to buy some Grateful Dead tickets and ... well... the rest is history.
Steve, out of guilt has even planted little hints in various products both hardware and software about this entire dark and twisted episode in the history of Apple...
Some of the more famous and and easy to find hints include:
The startup sound used on the very first Mac sold just 3 short years after 'the incident' when played in reverse and slowed down by a factor of 4 will sound a bone chilling 'I buried woz' in what is unmistakably Steve Jobs own voice. When confronted with this years later... Steve said.. I didn't say 'I buried woz' I said 'I bettered woz'.... Since I knew then that my leadership over the creation of the Mac was head and shoulders better than the Apple computer woz kluged together and wanted to make it known!
Serial numbers on the 78 models of a special (very) limited edition run of the now famous Macintosh were 32IF00001-32IF00078... The 32IF of course a clear nod to The Woz, that had he not died he would have been 32 years old. What made them special was the fact that the cases were 24k gold and diamond studded.
All were gifted to the board of directors and others involved with this coverup. A nurse know now only as 'Nurse X' who was on staff at the hospital at the time Woz was rushed in to the emergency room fell on some hard times and tried to sell the Macintosh with the 'unique' serial number on ebay... Shortly after the listing was made it was sold on Buy Out and the ebay account of the seller was closed permanently... The whereabouts of Nurse X? One has to wonder...
The black apple letterhead and business cards... Jobs, being quite full of himself didn't actually like the fact that this Woz stand in actually came to the company and worked (or pretended to anyway). So, to show this stand in who's the top dog, Jobs had all the business cards, letterhead and other printed items with the Apple logo printed in all black. Instead of the vibrant and colorful logo everyone else got to use.
A few years later an enterprising reporter brought up this little tidbit a stockholders meeting.. Jobs attempted to dismiss it by saying, "the printer simply ran out of colored inks.... Next!". That reporter can also be found on the national missing persons list.
More... yea there's LOTS more... but I'll leave it an exercise for the reader to find the others.
Anyway... to think all those people in line getting duped by this 'Woz Wannabe' and all you forum defenders... Cracks me up... Had you only known then what you know now.
Wait one sec... I think someone's at the doo$*($)^%^*G() %FH*()CN()$(*&%
Guess I'm officially too old for the forums... I thought someone would appreciate the use of the 'Paul is dead' Beatles conspiracy from the late 60's early 70s turned into a 'Woz is dead' Apple conspiracy... The connections we just so easy to make...
Hey if nothing else at least I had fun writing it.
Dave
...Hey if nothing else at least I had fun writing it.
Dave
Oh, hell. I had fun reading it, too. Even if I gave an Eggman response.
Awesome experience!
BUt WHY the box autographed?
Why not the back of the iPhone or MacBook?
Still you got an autograph!
Man wouldn't it be something if Woz came back to Apple?
Can you IMAGINE the presentation with Jobs & Wozniak?!
BUt WHY the box autographed?
Why not the back of the iPhone or MacBook?
Still you got an autograph!
Man wouldn't it be something if Woz came back to Apple?
Can you IMAGINE the presentation with Jobs & Wozniak?!
