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What is the stupidest self inflicted injury you have had.

MacNut

MacNut

macrumors Core
Original poster
Jan 4, 2002
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So I broke my hand going to bed about 12 years ago. Somehow I slipped on a piece of paper and caught my hand in the bed frame.

But that doesn't compare to my current stupid injury. Slicing off a piece of my thumb while cutting cabbage early Thanksgiving morning. It was one of those guillotine slicer things. My thumb got a little too close to the blade. :eek: The good news is the ER is quite at 2:00 am Thanksgiving morning. And they said it will heal on it's own.
 
Oh geez, MacNut. I hope that heals fast.

Maybe this will help...

Busting my forehead open on the toilet seat cover dispenser in my former job's women's bathroom. No, really.

I was too preoccupied telling my coworkers about this hot, young Slavic guy in my psych class. :rolleyes:

I didn't need stitches, but I was grateful two of my lady friends were at the sinks outside the stalls. They heard the thunk, called my name and I said, "Oh. Oh okay, my forehead is bleeding." They flipped out but were fantastic.

I've had some pretty klutzy accidents over the years, but this one remains the most stupid.
 
I've injured myself so many times it's hard to pick what would be at the top, so I'll just go with this:

At the start of the summer (this year) I had a bit of time and so I set to chopping some wood. I was tiring quickly (I'm disabled but can use the axe for short periods) so I thought "this is becoming dangerous; I'll stop after this log". I ended up stopping before finishing the log, but after hitting myself on the ankle with the recently-sharpened Fiskars axe. And yes, it was the blade. The best part, though, was that we had a party a week or so later so I enjoyed regaling family and friends with the story of how I tore myself a new axe hole:D:eek:
 
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I'm not really prone to self inflicted injury like some people I know.

I have a nice bruise on my stomach from walking into the a spare tire on the back of a Honda CRV in the dark last week (and I don't bruise easily). That's the best I can think of in recent time.
 
I once jammed a knife blade into the palm of my hand while trying to trim excess wax from a candle. It required a late night trip to the ER that resulted in stitches. I do now have a pretty neat scar though.
 
I tried to do this, but my knife, being exceptionally sharp, went right through the edge of the seed. And the avocado. And about half my thumb. Thank God for the bone in my thumb, else the knife would have gone right through. I still have nerve damage over a decade later.

bYc0Cqi.gif


Also ripped a muscle in my lower back whilst sitting down. Meaning, going from standing to seated. I didn't miss the chair, didn't slip, nothing like that - just ripped a muscle sitting down.
 
MacNut said:
So I broke my hand going to bed about 12 years ago. Somehow I slipped on a piece of paper and caught my hand in the bed frame.

But that doesn't compare to my current stupid injury. Slicing off a piece of my thumb while cutting cabbage early Thanksgiving morning. It was one of those guillotine slicer things. My thumb got a little too close to the blade. :eek: The good news is the ER is quite at 2:00 am Thanksgiving morning. And they said it will heal on it's own.
Click to expand...

Broken heart.
 
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The worst (physical) self inflicted injury I guess is when I tried to grab a bunch of utensils from the dishwasher... I didn't notice a knife that was put in pointy bit up and got a few stitches for my carelessness.

<edit> I knew I had shared this story before!... complete with pic! </edit>

The worst self inflicted injury was mental though. I've learned a great deal from that as well.
 
In high school when I was working as a wedding caterer, I hit myself directly in the eye with a popped champagne cork. I had to miss a week of school and wore an awesome eye patch for a couple of weeks, but I was very fortunate to suffer no permanent damage to the eye.
 
Self inflicted, you say? I've got two!

I was pretty dumb back in 6th grade. No common sense whatsoever. Needless to say, it's a wonder I'm managed to get to high school relatively unmaimed.

...relatively.

We used to have this stupid game called the Wimp Test that all the boys in my class played. The rules were simple and straightforward. You'd get into groups of 4, and each person involved would take turns rubbing the eraser end of a pencil up and down the top of their forearm for as long as they could. Whoever stopped earliest was The Wimp, and would have to endure great shame for the rest of their natural life.

With stakes that high, of course I have to go all out. When my turn comes up, I go to town with that pencil eraser.

Rub-rub-rub-rub-rub-rub-rub...

HA! I CAN ENDURE ANYTHING!

Rub-rub-rub-rub-rub-rub-rub...

LOOK AT YOU ALL WINCING AT MY PAIN, WHILE I SIT HERE UNPHAZED! I AM THE KING OF SCHOOL! :mad:

Rub-rub-rub-rub-rub-bleed-bleed-bleed-bleed...

OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD!

I'm honestly surprised I don't have a scar from that one. Won the Wimp Test, though. :D

The second store will come later, after I finish eating this delicious pizza I have sitting in front of me. It's considerably more gory too, so it'll be worth the wait.
 
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I've got footage (that I'm not releasing) of me speed climbing a tree, I didn't get the rhythm right (pulled up as the tree was flexing down, which compounds the force at the other end of the lever...the base of the tree) and it snapped at the base causing me to fall about 15 feet, and the tree right on my head. My right ear has a nice bumpy ridge of cartilage now.

The best part....it was in slooooooow mo.
 
When I was a kid, I built a tower of chairs and climbed up on it. Needles to say it was quite unstable and came down quickly. My head hit the radiator and I got a bad cut that had to be stitched. I can still feel a deep scar under my hair.

Unfortunately, I didn't seem to learn from this. Some time later I fought with my brother in a bed that had a cupboard at the head. My foot became entangled in the blanket and my face fell right onto the edge of the cupboard hitting a point between nose and forehead. So another stitch, another scar...
 
Tried to use an electric drill with the chuck key still in the chuck - broken finger + as I was taking exams at the time the teachers wrote to the exam board to get me excused for scrappy handwriting - I was 16 at the time :)

A few years later, in my 40s, a hand saw jumped off the door bottom I was sawing and went through my thumb knuckle. It was OK, the bone stopped the saw going any further :eek:

Cheers :)

Hugh
 
Silencio said:
In high school when I was working as a wedding caterer, I hit myself directly in the eye with a popped champagne cork. I had to miss a week of school and wore an awesome eye patch for a couple of weeks, but I was very fortunate to suffer no permanent damage to the eye.
Click to expand...

Wow, you are very lucky you didn't lose your eye.
 
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