I think I’m over playing the event. Every year I’d be more than happy if it got cancelled.
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Fair enough.
To be quite candid, I'm not really much of a fan of work socials myself.
There is the world of work, and there is the world of the private space; I do dislike this trend of blurring the boundaries between the two, and pretending that a work social is anything other than a work function disguised as a social event.
While some colleagues - over time - have indeed become friends, in general, I draw a distinction between the respective roles of friends and colleagues.
Agreed. Going out with work colleagues socially is fine. Going to an event at work organised by the company (which probably means me!) where the expectation is you will attend is not the same.
Spot on.
You have no idea how much work socials, or “fun at work/team building” activities. The first thing I did when I became able to do it was to cancel all the scheduled crap such as “Secret Santa”. I am appalled that some managers think that this type of events build a team. If you want to build a team, you do it organically, day by day, sharing a mission, goal, and making sure that your employees don’t feel like crap. There’s no use in a Secret Santa when the rest of the time the team doesn’t believe in you.
Agree completely.
Heading out with a few work colleagues - the ones you find congenial and whose company you enjoy - is one thing, and invariably occurs as a result of your own choice (choice of company, choice of venue, choice of activity.....)
A heartfelt and profound amen to this.
Well said.
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They used to do secret Santa at our place. First time they did it, it was a bit of fun with people buying joke gifts. But the last time they did it it had changed to uploading a list of things from Amazon you wanted within the agreed price list. At that point I really couldn’t see the point.
Anyway that was a few years ago now. I don’t think they do it anymore, but who knows. My colleagues know better than to ask if I wish to partake in anything remotely Christmas related.
I’ll happily go out for a drink with my immediate team but never with the other offices in our place. There’s a huge backstabbing culture in our company and I don’t trust anybody, let alone socialise, and get drunk with them. I avoid Xmas parties and summer gatherings and our R&D department tend to do our own thing which usually gets criticised behind our backs. My boss is based in the Netherlands and comes over once a month or we go there and usually have a great time. The rest of the company can go and swivel.
Personally, I love the separation between work and home. The clearer the line, the better. That doesn’t mean that you never go to lunch with your colleagues or that you don’t say happy birthday, but we’re not friend. A friendship might spawn out of it, but most of us are here because of the need for a paycheck.
That’s also why I am terrified of this push for remote work. I do understand many of the advantages, but I’d rather be uncomfortable than blur the DMZ I built to separate home from work and most importantly my free time (in the past few years I became very protective of my free time).
That’s also why I am terrified of this push for remote work. I do understand many of the advantages, but I’d rather be uncomfortable than blur the DMZ I built to separate home from work and most importantly my free time (in the past few years I became very protective of my free time).
When our company was smaller it was more social. But now days I think it’s more distant. I also think the world has changed a bit over the 15 years I’ve been there. People don’t want to go out drinking. Things you say at the pub aren’t necessarily the same things you’d say in the office.
But some of the younger people meet up for dungeons and dragons which I find funny given the last time I played they hadn’t been born.
But some of the younger people meet up for dungeons and dragons which I find funny given the last time I played they hadn’t been born.
Free time is a key part of a healthy work / life balance.
I’ve heard. To be fair I’ve cut down. Probably doing less than 50 hours per week now.
Not anymore for me. Used to be like that until I changed my mindset. I even get less money but I don’t care, my weekends and my free time are way too important. I stopped doing things that aren’t needed, and I made sure that I have the minimum amount of appointments. Examples: my job requires a Master’s degree. I only have an Associate’s. I was studying for a Bachelor’s, then I realized that it would’ve taken me 5 years and about $30,000 in debt. However the biggest cost was every single night and weekend for years. Sorry but my time with my wife and kids or books is more precious than a Bachelor’s (not making a generic statement on the values of degrees, I am talking about my specific situation). Same goes for martial arts. Even after becoming a black belt I saw that I had to spend minimum 3 nights a week at about 90mins/night to get to the next level. Sorry, but no; not anymore.
That’s a sensible way of looking at it. For me I’m working more than I should. But then I have sort of got accustomed to it. We all work differently.
I don’t have much else going on day to day.
Enjoyed a very pleasant chat (for around an hour and a half) with Decent Brother.
Attended one work social (BBQ in the grounds) where the two alpha males tending the meat on the BBQ nearly came to blows over whether the meat should be salted before or after cooking. Of course, no regard for those who didn't want the meat salted at all.
In their defense, you need to salt it before otherwise there will be no juice retention which will mess up everything, timing included. As for salt after cooking, yep gotta ask.
Oh dear, oh dear.
Quelle horreur.
That sounds as though it was a hilarious horror story.
Something about tending the meat at a BBQ (never mind that some prefer skewers of seriously cool vegetables) brings out extraordinarily atavistic instincts in some (alpha) males, who are all too often the kind of dudes who wouldn't be seen dead near an oven, or stove, in the rest of their lives.
I am all for the “real men” movement and crap, but in my view men that fight over petty stuff aren’t alpha, beta, or gamma. They’re omega at best. To be honest even using “men” might be wrong as they’re just childish.
Trying to pass Calculus with only two and a half weeks left of classes. I don't know why I'm taking that class, that might've been one of the more stupid life decisions I've made, I don't understand a single thing we're learning, nor have I ever understood. But it's too late now; I think the lesson I've learned here is that I should've gone in for help way before I did - like back in January, rather than in late March/April. I've got a plan though that I hope will work, but at this point, the best I'm ever gonna do is a C, which I'm honestly fine with. I'm going to avoid math classes in college as much as I can, that's for sure. I can write a pretty good essay/paper, I can analyze a book, put together a good video, and play some good music, but I just can't do math. For example, I'm taking an advanced Spanish class, where there is lots of reading and writing, and of course, discussions, which I'd argue is at or near the same "level of difficulty" in terms of the rigor/demands of the class as Calculus, and guess what, I'm doing just fine in there.
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You have my sympathy. There were two classes that I signed up for and then withdrew from after the first lecture because I couldn't understand them.
The first was Linear Algebra (I think I swapped for a course in Biometrics) and the second was Botanical Evolution. This latter decision was, literally, life-changing. I signed up for a course in Fortran programming instead, and went on, later, to become a scientific/biological programmer.
Well, see, you actually weren't stupid, and instead of waiting, you dropped the course right away. But I would have TOTALLY dropped Calculus if it weren't for two issues:
- At my school, you can only drop classes within two weeks of the course's start date (unless there are serious problems). This is a problem because we were still "reviewing concepts" at that point (that's the problem with high school I think, instructors take WAY TOO LONG to review material.)
- I think that would've also left a bad mark on my transcript, especially it being my senior year.
I once had a history teacher (who was quite wonderful, although many people disagreed), who had been a college professor for many years, and so, he planned out the entire year on his syllabus, as they would do in a college/university setting. It was nice to be seeing exactly what we would be doing later on, so I could plan ahead. But unfortunately, due to quite massive pushback regarding the material he was teaching (with which I didn't take issue, but many other people did), he left the school, but to some degree, I wish all high school teachers were like that... it would be nice.
Y'know, I wish people would just listen... to anyone—it seems like that's just not a thing people do anymore apparently. Too many people during our school assembly today were either talking, being on their phone, or otherwise distracted, and I was almost tempted to move and sit with the 11th graders, because literally everyone around me was distracted. It's very unfortunate I think that people don't know how to act appropriately during these kinds of things. Here's my opinion - if you aren't gonna listen, don't go. Simple as that.
The juniors were better disciplined than the seniors? Wow. It is sad that people's attention span, especially teenagers, have plummeted. People are so attached to their phones, and not in a good way.