Just give it some math problems to figure out. That'll keep it busy! Safari will probably be snappier now!
Put in a DVD. Rip it with Handbrake to get the CPU and Fans really hot and send that thing to hell!
I'd go with this option - get the inside fairly toasty and cook the little bugger
Wait - rMBPs don't have DVDs, D'oh
I don't know why your Mac swallowed a spider, did it wriggle and jiggle and tickle insider her? Get your Mac to swallow a bird, how absurd to swallow a bird! But she swallowed the bird to catch the spider, she swallowed the spider to catch the fly oh my, perhaps she'll die!
it didnt swallow it, the spider voluntaryly walked into it.
i was using the retina mac, and saw it at the top of my keyboard area when i came back, i proceeded to smoosh it then clean it off, but the dam thign was fast and crawled into the vent behind the hinge.
called apple they said warrenty doesnt cover insects that go inside the system LOL
Just put your macbook in the washer.. I'm pretty sure the spider will be drowned and this problem is solved.
I was adapting an old nursery rhyme to make a joke