Adults on Social Networking Sites....

[notjustjay]

I've got a Facebook page and – horror of horrors – I'm nearly 32. I don't know which of creepy/gross/ridiculous/pathetic most applies to me, but I'm sure that there's probably a couple of apps that will tell me.

Part of what drew me to Facebook is that many of my friends (and, yes, admittedly, somewhat younger than I) were constantly talking about it, and so I created an account just to see what the fuss was about. Then I did the usual contact search and realized that practically everyone I know is on board. This could vary wildly with different people in different cultures and countries (Canada, for example, apparently has an EXTREMELY high percentage of people who use Facebook). If all your friends and family are on it, then of course it makes sense to join up. If they're not, then... you might just feel like an awkward adult amongst a sea of people-mostly-younger-than-you.

 

[ucfgrad93]

I'm 42 and really don't see the purpose of facebook, myspace, etc.

 

[72930]

I recently forbade my dad from Facebook.

 

[mahashel]

I'm in my 30's, and I created a MySpace acct so I could keep in touch with my bro in Pennsylvania without having to deal with a myriad of different accounts.
IM: for chat
email: too-big for chat
Phone: voice
Skype: voice
Flickr: for photos

OR a "creepy old guy like me" could just get a damned MySpace account.
My profile is private, I've actually MET every person I friended on that site *before* I friended them, and I screen every comment/message before allowing it to persist.

Seems to me that the OP needs to stop assuming things about a demographic they obviously don't understand. Not everybody over 20 has an alarm clock that's been flashing 12:00 since they bought it. (I almost said VCR, but that may not have proven my point very well.. have the current crop of teenagers ever known pre-DVD video?)

 

[whocares]

Ooh, I better add something to your wall then!

They have walls on Facebook?

Do I need a brick-laying degree to sign up?

 

[calculus]

Seems to me that the OP needs to stop assuming things about a demographic they obviously don't understand.

The young are very stuck in their ways you know ...

 

[Spizzo]

My favorite part about myspace is all the ads i've been getting for porn. No longer do I have to mess with those pesky search engines. Now the 'porn stars' are coming to me, begging for me to watch them!

Remember when you used to have to get that stuff by email?

 

[Lixivial]

Well given certain recent movements about protecting the privacy of MySpacers, I would argue that these places were never intended for kids.

now anyone with an email can join. lame.

Is the issue here the lack of "exclusivity" of these sites?

Yup, I think so. As an aside, how about them there rising Apple market share numbers? He also seems to have some sort of resentment toward his brother or something, given his statements. And I wonder if stevento shared these eloquently, well-defined and insightful thoughts with his creepy 30-year-old brother.

Finally, why isn't this in his MySpace blog -- why is it here?

 

[Cloudane]

My generalisations (so don't take offense) of the social networks are:

Myspace: The original. A variety of people use it, but it's now mostly for bands and those who are into indie type music.

Xanga: For your "emos" or people who like to write page after page about how unhappy they are and how unfair life is, conveniently forgetting that there are kids in Ethiopia who can barely dream of food+water let alone internet access.

Bebo: Where all the kids are at, though of course some adults use it too. Especially popular with females in their late teens/early 20s in my experience.

Facebook: Most of the grown ups seem to head here. Quite a dangerous site because it's mainly your co-workers, kindly labelling a picture of you puking up a back alley somewhere on a weekend, which your boss will later find and question the future of your employment. Many people have been fired for stuff that appears on here. This is probably why it's become so popular - businesses love it and push it, what better way to keep tabs on your employees - either their private lives or the timestamps of their online activities that coincide with work time.

Gaia: More of a messageboard-virtual-world-thing but sortof socially networky so I'll include it here. Average age 13. I'm serious. Don't go there.

Twitter: More of a one-line blogging site, but look here for that type of person who feels the need to inform the world every time they go for a dump.



I have accounts on all of them

MySpace - My list consists of RL friends who are into music. I quite like this one, it's not designed very well but compared to Facebook it's nice and tidy.

Xanga - Stopped visiting ages ago. Used it to keep up with a female friend, late teens, who got more and more emo by the day until I couldn't stand reading it any longer. I thought people grew out of it when they hit 17.. I was wrong

Bebo - Use it to keep up with an ex colleague. Female, few years younger than me, you know the story... started with the old classic office crush, ended up in her "friends list" It's a lonely little page with only comments off her and little hearts that have no 'special' meaning. I have a couple of (male) friends on there so that it at least doesn't look like a public PM system. No, I don't hit on her any more and no, there are no under 16s on my list

Facebook - RL friends, colleagues and fellow members of a messageboard I don't really want the colleagues to find out about. This site will be the death of privacy. I ought to tidy it up sometime, maybe split into alias (recreation) and real (work) accounts. The apps annoy the hell out of me, no I don't want to be a zombie or a slayer or forward on your silly chain letter, or tell you whether I fancy you or not, go away!

Gaia - "Ooh look, it's the biggest messageboard in the world, this must be good! Aw and it's cutesy! And you can fish and get things for your avatar and stuff!" - the novelty wears off when you realise the average age in there is 13, and more so when it's confirmed by the admins. Suddenly 2 things happen a) You feel like a pedo just for having signed up (especially if you made friends) and b) You realise just how annoying 13 year olds are when they're spamming the board with racist and/or homophobic threads etc. My little manga guy with blue hair and bunny ears has been neglected for many months.

Twitter - Yeah, I tried that bandwagon. I felt like a self important wanker and got rather bored of updating it... and reading the inane twitterings from others just made me realise what I was putting other people through. Seriously, WTF?


All in all... any of them can be applied to adults, except probably Gaia. My favourite of the bunch has to be Myspace I think, it lets me keep in touch without cataloguing my entire life or being spammed with application requests which the next most favourable Facebook is so keen on doing.

 

[flyinmac]

Many of us do too, social network or not. We may even tell you about our underpants....

Some of what you said is just as bad as what the OP said. Just statements about people that just seem a bit baseless.

You would think that they were baseless statements because they just seem so ridiculous. But, trust me, that's what many people are doing on there (I've seen a few postings when I was curious as to just what people do on there - then I decided it wasn't worth going back to).

So, just to see if I'm really off base in my statement, I did a little Google Search with the results limited to myspace.com.

So, regarding going to the bathroom and telling everyone about it, here's a few quotes that came up from people's postings on MySpace:

From Amber who is Female 26 in Alabama:

I had a great case of mud-butt today that I thought you guys should hear about. It was about 2 cups of feces with a very sticky, clay-like consistency. It was a pretty peanut buttery color that was quite appealing. Everything about it was interesting, including the toxic whiskey-distillery/ used motor oil smell. YAY POOP!!

From timmy who is 20 in Maryland:

lets talk about poop...well today i took 2 poops....the first was around 130pm n it was a dark black and brown poop about 9 inches long and a relatively good thickness... the second was after dinner right befor i got in the shower... it was more of a slushy diareahh type of poo... what was ur poop like today???

From * HeAvEn's MiSsiNg AnGeL * who is 28 in Maryland:

well after denny's last night i realized a forgot to chew a sausage link and that bitch came out side ways....followed by a two cups of chocolate milk with pulp. deff one of the worst mud turtles ive ever seen

From free who is 25:

i ate bad hamburger yesterday, so today i **** 100% liquid. twice.

From PETE of fargo in North Dakota:

I drank a purple powerade yesterday;
my poop was green today.
I love it.

Another one from Amber who is Female 26 in Alabama:

I ate too much fiber today. Too much fiber?! Is there such a thing? The answer is YES. A resounding yes! It hit me during CNA class. All of a sudden there was a tremendous pressure in my intestines and I was cramping up. I hit the toilet only to find that the door wouldn't lock and I had to hold it shut. Not only that, but a girl from my class was in the stall next to me. So I waited until she flushed to let out a tentative fart but the gas EXPLODED forth with such fury, it shook out a little diarrhea, but not gooey diarrhea, oh no, the crunchy kind that stings the anus on its way out like fecal hornets. I didn't have much time, so I wiped and held the rest of it in until class was over. I tried again. Again there were many of my classmates in the restroom. I let out as much as I could during flushes but held in most of it during the silences. They knew the smell was coming from my stall, but I still didn't want the shameful flatulent noises to be even more of a testament to my disgusting ways. I stopped after a couple of minutes and decided to hold it in until I reached the comfort of my own home. That also could have been a terrible mistake. I almost didn't make it all the way inside. I was on the verge of ******** myself when I sat down on the toilet. It took approximately 10 minutes for all the gas and poop to finally come out. And if I had some way of measuring gas, I would say that there was more gas than poop. If you're scared for my health, don't worry. I feel better now.

Seriously people, I could give you an unlimited supply of these. It just never ends. There's literally thousands of these.


So, am I way off base on the pimple on their rear? Let's find out:

From Pooneefa Female FLORIDA

Thoughts First Waking Up:, "I gotta pee", then "Oh ****, what time is it?" Your Best Physical Feature:, The pimple on my butt. It keeps my ass company

Here's a Combo:

roxymorgan 23 Female:

took my afternoon **** and now i'm about to pop a pimple on my one of my chins ...

Note the MacRumors site censored the one above. The dots refer to their afternoon dump.


Another Combo:

From Britny 17:

and im on my period, which sucks. and i have a pimple on my cheek, ..

From Zenas 19 Male:

My butt hurts, I think I have a pimple, how you might ask, who the heck knows.

So, really, I don't see where I'm off base. People talk about all kinds of ridiculous things that really no-one should want to hear about. But, for some reason, everyone wants to know what color their crap was and how big it was and whether it was mushy or firm.

I'm sorry to have to say, this is seriously what people are talking about. Not everyone, but an amazingly high number in the multiples of thousands.

I won't bother checking the rest of my statements as I'm sure a Google search will quickly reveal all of them as well. Quite sad

 

[Reissman]

I am AHMMM above 30. Myspace is the only way for me to keep in contact with my cousin who is over 40. They are in Korea where her husband is. Also, my younger cousins. When I was a youth leader at my church Myspace is how we would contact the youth for activites.

Just because creepy people are on their doesnt mean all older people are creepy. I find many people in their 20's very creepy. My wife and I went to a pub the other night to see my friends band. Around 11:00 the place flooded with young people and all they wanted to do is take pitcures of themselves acting stupid. I assume to post on their myspace.

 

[rockthecasbah]

I don't have a problem with older people using social networking sites, but it is nevertheless creepy. Perfect example, a guidance counselor at my school friend requested a girl, a minor, in my high school on facebook... Like what are you doing? It's not like he's fresh out of college, he told us he's over 50. That crosses just so many bounds, and has so many pressures. What are you supposed to say, no and then be confronted by that adult?


The problem isn't adults using these sites in general, but their attempts to "connect with the youth." In an age where stories of pedophilia, sexual harrassment, scandals within "honored and prestigious institutions" and so forth have become "regular" media reports, the idea that an adult is making this connection to children is unnerving to say the least.


Odds are that these kind of social networking behaviors are not malicious. They are often times in good fun and meant to be harmless. But our society has always made us believe the worst intentions are those at work. Some adults may simply want to try to 'be cool', but they seem to just be hurting their cause more than helping it. Let the kids do their own things and network with your own age group i say

 

[flyinmac]

I don't have a problem with older people using social networking sites, but it is nevertheless creepy. Perfect example, a guidance counselor at my school friend requested a girl, a minor, in my high school on facebook... Like what are you doing? It's not like he's fresh out of college, he told us he's over 50. That crosses just so many bounds, and has so many pressures. What are you supposed to say, no and then be confronted by that adult?


The problem isn't adults using these sites in general, but their attempts to "connect with the youth." In an age where stories of pedophilia, sexual harrassment, scandals within "honored and prestigious institutions" and so forth have become "regular" media reports, the idea that an adult is making this connection to children is unnerving to say the least.


Odds are that these kind of social networking behaviors are not malicious. They are often times in good fun and meant to be harmless. But our society has always made us believe the worst intentions are those at work. Some adults may simply want to try to 'be cool', but they seem to just be hurting their cause more than helping it. Let the kids do their own things and network with your own age group i say

Actually, the real problem here is that we allow kids to mess around on these sites and make "connections" with people they don't know. And, of course that they will tell everything to everyone right on their page.

If we're concerned about the kids, then perhaps painting a bulls-eye on them isn't the best idea.

 

[Abstract]

I'm sorry to have to say, this is seriously what people are talking about. Not everyone, but an amazingly high number in the multiples of thousands.

Does FaceBook have to function different from reality? Facebook is still the real world. Some people discuss this sort of thing with their friends in person.... multiples of thousands of people. How do you avoid these people in real life situations? I'm guessing that you don't become friends with these people, or try to get to know them.

When you're on these social networking sites, do you have to be friends with the people who talk about this sort of thing? No. In fact, I can't really read the profile of a person I haven't approved of in FaceBook, so how hard is it to avoid these people? It isn't.

 

[flyinmac]

Does FaceBook have to function different from reality? Facebook is still the real world. Some people discuss this sort of thing with their friends in person.... multiples of thousands of people. How do you avoid these people in real life situations? I'm guessing that you don't become friends with these people, or try to get to know them.

When you're on these social networking sites, do you have to be friends with the people who talk about this sort of thing? No. In fact, I can't really read the profile of a person I haven't approved of in FaceBook, so how hard is it to avoid these people? It isn't.

Sure, you can avoid them. I do so by not going to the sites in the first place. The examples were given just to show that my original observations (in a previous post) of behavior on those sites was not really "baseless" as the responder had indicated.

They are in-fact provable through a simple search.

 

[Marble]

Hilarious, flyinmac.

I find facebook useful for rediscovering and keeping up with old friends from school, but have not acquired the army of acquaintances that others have. I can refer friends to my personal website in my profile, the information on which is much easier to control.

 

[flyinmac]

Hilarious, flyinmac.

Yes, just absolutely unbelievable.

The really sad thing was how many others posted pictures and movies so everyone could see for themselves

 

[neilspartacus]

its the kids who need to do work harder

im 26 and your age limit on social networking sites sounds ridiculous to me. To me its the kids who should be away from these! You get to work harder for your grades not me!
I use by orkut to stay in touch with old buddies of mine since school. And its often kinds with premature mindset land into trouble doing this social networking!

 

[Cloudane]

Whoever's trying to hack my Gaia account... why?

Give it a rest.

 

[Abstract]

Sure, you can avoid them. I do so by not going to the sites in the first place. The examples were given just to show that my original observations (in a previous post) of behavior on those sites was not really "baseless" as the responder had indicated.

Yes, and these "observations" are things that people do verbally talk about with their friends. I find Facebook behaviour no more insulting or disgusting than real people you may come across in real life.


What I'm trying to say is: You come across these sorts of people on Facebook, and you say you didn't join or participate on Facebook and other social networking sites to avoid those people. You really could just use Facebook and simply avoid the people you don't like. To not try it because of a very small problem seems strange. Do you just lock yourself in your bedroom and stop participating in the game of life because you want to avoid weird/gross people? The handling of people and situations on FaceBook is just like how you'd do it normally, except you can't seem to handle avoiding people you dislike on FaceBook, while I'm sure you can in real life.

And again, you NEVER meet people you don't know on Facebook anyway, so there actually is no problem, and your ideas, fears, and this entire discussion IS baseless. You can't meet these gross people on FaceBook. You can only meet and interact with your friends. If your friends are the type of people who post dumb things on their FaceBook account, you picked the wrong friends in real life too. What do you do now. Avoid life?

 

[Blue Velvet]

Just to spite the OP, I have set up my Facebook account right now.

And within hours, it's changed my life!

Let me assure those amongst you who are concerned that us oldies want to connect with teh yoof, that I personally have no interest in your activities... and before you know it, because time goes quickly, you too will soon be 35+.

I'm treading my toes very carefully into the water here and intend to use it as a social and work activity... that's why I shall not be posting drunken pics of me and why I will also be getting LinkedIn.

Anyway, those here who know my real full name are welcome to contact me on Facebook.

 

[Aeolius]

Next thing you know, you'll be saying that 40+ year olds can't hang out in the Dungeons & Dragons chat rooms.

 

[SamIchi]

Am I allowed to watch Spongebob?

 

[Aeolius]

Am I allowed to watch Spongebob?

Yes, but having Tiny Tim's "Livin' in the Sunlight, Lovin' in the Moonlight" (Spongebob pilot episode) on your iPod is just creepy.... ::checks iTunes Library:: .... umm... nevermind.

 

[notjustjay]

I don't have a problem with older people using social networking sites, but it is nevertheless creepy. Perfect example, a guidance counselor at my school friend requested a girl, a minor, in my high school on facebook... Like what are you doing?

Absolutely agree, that is completely inappropriate, and a SCHOOL GUIDANCE COUNSELLOR, of all people ought to know better. These people receive training on dealing with abuse disclosures and specifically on being "above reproach" in their conduct with students. At least, I would hope they do!

I work with youth and children through my church youth group and a summer camp I volunteer with. Many of these teens are on Facebook, and some of them are indeed on my friends list. But I make it a point NEVER to be the one to initiate friend requests with these people -- and I will only accept the request made if the youth in question is actually a real life friend (and, ideally, I know their parents well too). And if they're under 13 -- forget it.

Admittedly, not all teachers, youth leaders and summer camp counsellors are as discriminating, and as much as I wish I could just say "everyone should just use common sense" I recognize that my camp needs to revisit its official camper follow-up policy to acknowledge the presence of social networking sites, and establish some hard rules about what camp leaders can and cannot do. (And as I'm on the board of directors, I actually have the authority and understanding needed to make this change).

Sounds like your guidance counsellor needs some of the same.