As Apple has now officially provided an inadequate response that is exactly what I am doing, thank you very much.

I'm sorry I insulted Apple, I know it hurts you deeply. I am sorry I was so retarded to think they could do any wrong, of course not they're perfect!
I love everything else about the phone and it was in many ways better than my two previous Apple phones but being unable to make a decent call is not an option in my business - I have no problem with Apple but I am not blind to them being able to make mistakes.
As a consumer of Apple products I am entitled to air my opinions on them in an open forum like this, I didn't want to return the phone because it is a lot of time (=money) and hassle - the O2 shop I bought it from is about 30 minutes drive away, all I wanted was for Apple to fix the problem. Their line is not a fix for the real problem - it's a band aid, many will accept it, good for them (and you). Well done for believing all you are told, you should steer clear of the news or you'll believe we are causing global warming, that we really did walk on the moon and that it was really terrorists that caused 911...

(sorry for the sarcasm, I'm just bored of Apple fanboys lately, I only ever said good things about Apple until I got this phone too)
Now I just need to cancel my 24 month contract with O2, I hope they don't take issue with it...