man, this is my favorite chuck norries line. second fav:
chuck norris wears ribbed condoms inside out, so HE gets the pleasure.
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Chuck Norris... Jokes
- Thread starter lozanoj83
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man, this is my favorite chuck norries line. second fav:
chuck norris wears ribbed condoms inside out, so HE gets the pleasure.
People having a near death experience don't see light at the end of the tunnel. They see Chuck Norris. And get scared back to life.
After watching a couple of Chuck Norris movies I can't stand him now (the jokes will always live on tho).
I really like the Jack Bauer jokes more.
I really like the Jack Bauer jokes more.
Chuck Norris sleeps w/ a night light, not b/c hes affraid of the dark, but b/c the dark is afraid of him.
My favorite...
Chuck Norris and Lance Armstrong had a "who has more testicles" competition.
Chuck won by 5.
Chuck Norris and Lance Armstrong had a "who has more testicles" competition.
Chuck won by 5.
Who would win in rock-paper-scissors, Chuck Norris, or God? God. But Chuck Norris would have the last laugh when he roundhouse kicks Him so hard that he ends up back in the Old Testament.
Who would win in wrestling, Chuck Norris or God? God, on a technicality, because ripping your opponents lungs out is not permitted in wrestling.
Who would win in wrestling, Chuck Norris or God? God, on a technicality, because ripping your opponents lungs out is not permitted in wrestling.
They're essentially all the same as the CN jokes. But let's see:
Life handed Jack Bauer lemons. Jack used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer f*****g hates lemonade.
The only reason you're still conscious right now is because Jack Bauer doesn't want to carry you around. (Best quote from Season 5).
If Jack Bauer is shooting in your direction and misses you, it's because he was aiming for another terrorist 12 miles away.
Jack Bauer's parent's threw a surprise birthday party for him. Once. Jack Bauer f*****g hates surprises.
If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he’d shoot Nina twice.
Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
f you get 7 stars on your wanted level on Grand Theft Auto, Jack Bauer comes after you. You don’t want to get 7 stars.
Jack Bauer can watch all 6 seasons of 24 in 24 hours.
Killing Jack Bauer doesn’t make him dead. It just makes him angry
Don’t ask what Jack Bauer would do for a Klondike bar…
BTW, I like the Jack Bauer jokes better than the CN jokes.
I thought this joke was too funny:
If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make a bomb out of MacGyver and get out.
If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make a bomb out of MacGyver and get out.
The Don Ditty said:
Bill Gates doesn't die, when that happens he merely reincarnates himself as a new version of the windows OS.
Oh God! Oh, oh, oh God! (que Glenn Quagmire)
Does the explain why Windows sucks so much? There must be a way to defeat him!
The Don Ditty said:
Yes, kinda. It aloso explains why WIndows development has slowed. Bill is become immune to all attacks
Yes, kinda. It aloso explains why WIndows development has slowed. Bill is become immune to all attacks
Interesting... his OS isn't
ftw
Interesting... his OS isn't
You are pointing out Vista's flaws.... cancel or allow?
What's the difference between Bill Gates and a brick?
A brick gets laid!
Ba-doom-boom-che
