Disclaimer: angry and judgmental rant follows. I don't mean to offend anyone, but what I've seen in this thread shocks and saddens me. My comments are not directed at any one person.
[rant]
It just stuns me that people in this day and age can still think that hitting children is acceptable. They're not just "kids," they're people. Think about how you'd feel if someone bigger and stronger with total power over you hit you every time you did something wrong. Sound like fun? Sound like a good way to engender love and respect? Thugs and bullys throughout history have known that enough physical violence can make people behave.
If that's the only way you can make your child understand you, then you really need to work on your parenting skills. And before you ask, no I don't have children yet, but I've taken care of children plenty of times and wasn't a child so long ago myself.
My parents are both wonderful, loving, people. My two brothers and I were raised without being hit. None of us has ever been in trouble with the law, was ever suspended from school, or ever had discipline problems with any authority figure that didn't deserve it. The vast majority of my friends were raised without being hit and they turned out the same. Kids can understand and respond to an awful lot.
Put hitting aside for a moment. Parents are not always right. Sometimes they're arbitrary and mean for no reason. Sometimes they're just bastards in general; there are a lot of bastards out there, and unfortunately, sometimes they reproduce. To assume that a parent is always right, just because they're the adult, is the height of ignorance and arrogance. Children are people too. Smaller, not as developed mentally or physically, but people. Yes, sometimes a parent has to put his or her foot down, but that doesn't mean that you lash out physically or stop treating your child like a person. You want your children to treat you with respect? Try treating them with some. [/rant]
As to the specifics of this situation, I don't know. From what the OP has said, it sounds like his dad lost his cool for no real reason. He not only took the ibook, but also beat the OP with a belt. For... what, exactly? Not getting ready fast enough? If any adult behaved like that towards another adult, we'd all agree that he had serious anger management issues and was a real danger. But because the victim is a child, the great majority of you seem to think the father is justified.
Of course, we are only hearing the OP's side of it. I don't know what the OP's father would say. Nothing could justify beating his son with a belt, but maybe taking the ibook was reasonable. I don't know. What I do know is that this is a complex situation between two people, and can't be resolved as easily as "he's right because he's your father."
Ultimately, of course, those of you who say that the father has authority are right. Both physically and legally, he is in control. It's a shame that he can't control his temper, but such is life. So my advice to you, Hummer, is to try to learn to see his blow-ups coming and avoid them. Not because he's necessarily right (tho he may be), but because it will make your life a whole lot easier.
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