I agree about leather. also about wet sport loops.
Have you given the sport bands a try? Coming from a more traditional watch, I was never very interested in Apple Watch - looked like a toy. Now I love it, it's fun.
My watches look great. I wouldn't say I'm crazy careful, but since I heard before I got the SB Milanese was scratch prone I was looking out for it. I'm like you, I handle my nice things with care.
I have not given the sport bands a try. I just don't like the look of them, so even if they feel good and are comfortable it's just not something I would wear other than during hard workouts (which I don't do a lot of).
I'm still very interested in the milanese loop. I know I can keep it away from the display, but I'm concerned about the aluminum body between the display and the lug around which the band loops. I'm also trying to find a new and unused black woven nylon from a reputable store but have been unsuccessful so far. I'm hoping it will lessen my interest in the milanese loop, but that's probably just kidding myself to be honest I'm trying so hard not to want the milanese because of the risk involved but I find it difficult.
I have also looked into third party nato style bands from companies such as clockwork synergy, but the shipping and customs are more than the band itself and all I can find around here are chinese no names.