At Apple, we believe that you don't need a fast computer. What we believe you need, is an expensive computer. That's right, the new MacBook Glue, made of 80% glue. That's up to 37% more glue than before!
It also comes with, you guessed it, one
full year of warranty
included in the price. That's right! For one
whole year, you get to use this computer without worrying about it breaking. That's a
whole year. This means that you only have to spend $1200 every year in order to keep owning a computer that works. Well, unless next year's model costs more, which it probably will because why wouldn't it?
The new MacBook Glue. Now with only 1 USB port if your charger is plugged in, and it also requires adapters to do
anything.
And now, it also has our incredible T2 chip, which is great because it means only
we can repair your computer, for roughly the price of buying a new one. Well, at least until we declare it obsolete next year. After that,
no one can repair it.
At Apple, we believe in simplicity:
Need a new battery? Buy a new computer.
A key on your keyboard got some dust underneath? Buy a new computer.
The screen stopped working for no reason? Buy a new computer.
Repairs have never been simpler! World-class customer service, woohoo!
New feature: It
still has a headphone jack!