I am actually considering this exact same situation...heh.
The research that I did when I was buying my Mac Pro indicated that the memory controller for the Nehalem's works like you were saying. In a 4-slot configuration the first three slots are treated as triple channel, and the 4th is treated as single channel. This has to do with the bandwidth of the overall memory controller, it simply can't handle two triple channel pipelines at once. So basically if you install 3x4GB sticks and 1x2GB stick then you'll have 3x bandwidth to the 12GB, and 1x bandwidth to the 2GB.
What is not clear to me is how the controller actually allocates storage between the sticks. At first I thought that it would simply fill up the 12GB first, and then move on to the 2...which you'd think would be fine. You'd get excellent performance from your RAM until you filled it up, and then you'd get slightly less performance for that last 2GB. But I haven't actually read anywhere that it works that way. For all I know it could use the 2GB first, in the worst case, or even evenly across the rest of the system. If it does work that way it could hurt performance, but to be honest I am not totally sure.
It's also worth pointing out that in tests done between triple channel and dual channel configurations that triple channel wins...but barely. As in the difference doesn't really even matter. Single would obviously be more of a difference though.
One thing is clear though: disk access is far worse than single channel RAM performance. So overall, if you're maxing out your RAM, I think this configuration could be worth testing out.
So to answer your question, I think I can mostly validate your assumptions...but I am not totally sure of the end result. I actually came here to post today to ask the exact same question, because I am not totally sure. I get my 3x4GB sticks in the mail today, so I may very well try it out later, and if I do i'll try to post my findings. But if there's anyone out there that does actually KNOW whether or not this would be advantageous...please let us know
