in a few days i'll be taking an eleven hour flight ... all scrunched up in economy. not looking forward to that!
My Exgirlfriend is my Secret Roomate
- Thread starter carbonmotion
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in a few days i'll be taking an eleven hour flight ... all scrunched up in economy. not looking forward to that!
carbonmotion
macrumors 6502a
being mean would be fun and all, but my objective is to push her in to grad school. i mean, even though we broke up, i still care for her. in any case, this is the last time i'm going to take care of her, so i might as well do it right. and. its the right thing to do.
zblaxberg
Guest
Send her to the shop for a bottle of milk and while she's out change the front door lock .....
I'd do that, she moved into your place while you were gone, thats not cool and as said before, illegal. You shouldn't feel bad at all changing the locks and giving her a time frame. It sounds like if you don't have the guts to do this then maybe you aren't over her either. You need to just stand strong and tell her, in a week or so I'm changing the locks, you aren't getting a key and you will have to go somewhere else. Don't take no for an answer, maybe even leave her a letter while you go outta the house for a day so you don't have to deal with her trying to convince you otherwise.
carbonmotion
macrumors 6502a
well i broke up with her after all! no im pretty sure i've stopped having romantic feelings for her for the last segment of our relationship. that said, we used to live in this place together, and i guess she still had a key from before.
that said, we've had a relationship as friends, research partners, house mates (in college), and finally girl/boy friends... so, i know her really well and care for her a great deal. calling the cops on her won't solve any of her problems. i want do the best for everyone involved.
byakuya
macrumors 6502a
oh man...you sure are one noble man...
would never do something like that...
but very impressed...
byakuya
well said...good for you.
CorvusCamenarum
macrumors 65816
I have, once, but only by accident so to speak. BA bumped my whole family to first class coming back from London. It was quite nice.
To the OP: You're sending this girl a completely wrong message. She breaks into your home on the premise of a sob story, and now she gets to go back to mommy and daddy on your first class dime. You're not responsible for her. You're also teaching her that her illegal actions have no consequences, and you can rest assured that the next time she's in a bind, it's your door on which she'll come knocking.
PlaceofDis
macrumors Core
good on you for doing the right thing. going a bit more out of your way than i would probably. but i'd like to think i'd do the same in the same situation.
good luck with breaking it to her though.
good luck with breaking it to her though.
carbonmotion
macrumors 6502a
i don't think that will be the case
RedTomato
macrumors 601
I think you did the right thing in giving her a graceful exit. But no way would I have booked her first class. She needs to learn how real people live. Get her a cheap ticket back to her parents.
I was in a similar situation - I moved out of my flat for a year to study at university (masters degree), and rented it out VERY cheap to an American girl I knew (and I was a bit sweet on her, but we never dated or anything).
On one of my home visits, she asked me could she fiddle the electricitymeter ( i.e. get the electricity for free - we both had friends who did it a lot). I said no cos it took me a long time to get the flat, and it was at a good rent, and I didn't want to risk being kicked out.
After uni finished, I came back and found she is still there. Asked her to move out pls. She went and stayed with her new boyfriend, but my flat was still FULL of all her stuff (she was a bit of a packrat). Deadlines came and went, one after the other.
After no progress, I laid down that on Sunday I would help her pack and move out. OK no probs. She came over, we spent all day packing. Right, where's the removal van? She booked a van like she said she would, right?
'Oops I forgot! I'll just ring up and get one." Babe, it's 11pm on a sunday, where are you gonna find a bloody van??
There's still lots more to pack, (did I say she was a real packrat? Boxes and piles of stuff everywhere in my tiny flat) so we agree same again the next sunday. Exactly the same thing happened. No bloody van. Plus her snogging her new boyfriend in the kitchen while I'm trying to sort out her stuff.
I'd had enough. The next day, I texted her that if she didn't move her stuff out, I would take all her knickers and underpants and bra's down to the local police station, and give them to the local cops ...
She hit the roof, was really furious at me, but two days later my flat was clear. Result! I wasn't serious about giving her stuff to the cops, I'd never do something sh¡tty like that, but it got over to her how I felt.
Later, I'm clearing up, and find equipment for fiddling the electricity meter, and realise she's been fiddling my electricity meter for months and months (friends told me she had electric heaters on all the time when they visited, even though I have a working gas fired central heating system).
I could have lost my flat and or/been arrested if the electricity company had found out. I'm glad she's out of my life.
BTW I did get a visit from them to 'check a problem with my meter' a few weeks later, but luckily everything was fine.
xTomato
I was in a similar situation - I moved out of my flat for a year to study at university (masters degree), and rented it out VERY cheap to an American girl I knew (and I was a bit sweet on her, but we never dated or anything).
On one of my home visits, she asked me could she fiddle the electricitymeter ( i.e. get the electricity for free - we both had friends who did it a lot). I said no cos it took me a long time to get the flat, and it was at a good rent, and I didn't want to risk being kicked out.
After uni finished, I came back and found she is still there. Asked her to move out pls. She went and stayed with her new boyfriend, but my flat was still FULL of all her stuff (she was a bit of a packrat). Deadlines came and went, one after the other.
After no progress, I laid down that on Sunday I would help her pack and move out. OK no probs. She came over, we spent all day packing. Right, where's the removal van? She booked a van like she said she would, right?
'Oops I forgot! I'll just ring up and get one." Babe, it's 11pm on a sunday, where are you gonna find a bloody van??
There's still lots more to pack, (did I say she was a real packrat? Boxes and piles of stuff everywhere in my tiny flat) so we agree same again the next sunday. Exactly the same thing happened. No bloody van. Plus her snogging her new boyfriend in the kitchen while I'm trying to sort out her stuff.
I'd had enough. The next day, I texted her that if she didn't move her stuff out, I would take all her knickers and underpants and bra's down to the local police station, and give them to the local cops ...
She hit the roof, was really furious at me, but two days later my flat was clear. Result! I wasn't serious about giving her stuff to the cops, I'd never do something sh¡tty like that, but it got over to her how I felt.
Later, I'm clearing up, and find equipment for fiddling the electricity meter, and realise she's been fiddling my electricity meter for months and months (friends told me she had electric heaters on all the time when they visited, even though I have a working gas fired central heating system).
I could have lost my flat and or/been arrested if the electricity company had found out. I'm glad she's out of my life.
BTW I did get a visit from them to 'check a problem with my meter' a few weeks later, but luckily everything was fine.
xTomato
atthecross
macrumors 6502
You might be able to pack her up stuff up and kick her out like that in DC but I can tell you from first hand experience that you can not do that in CA. In CA you have to go through an eviction process because they have established residency with your consent.
I'm not saying it's right or makes sense I'm just saying that's how it is in CA. I had to get a restraining order to get the person out to avoid having to go through eviction process
I'm not saying it's right or makes sense I'm just saying that's how it is in CA. I had to get a restraining order to get the person out to avoid having to go through eviction process
carbonmotion
macrumors 6502a
i just told her what's up. she wasn't happy about it, but she wasn't unhappy about it. my girlfriend's coming over and we're all going to pack her thing in to packing boxes filled with peanuts. After that we're going to put all the boxes in to the back of my truck. my girlfriend agreed to take her in for the rest of the week before she leaves.
The only thing I have in mind is finally getting the time and space being able to buy my xbox 360 and enjoy halo 3.
The only thing I have in mind is finally getting the time and space being able to buy my xbox 360 and enjoy halo 3.
killerrobot
macrumors 68020
You're a brave man, letting your ex and current girlfriend cohabitate.
I thought you handled everything good until this point.
Getting some alone time with Halo 3 might be worth it though.
I thought you handled everything good until this point.
Getting some alone time with Halo 3 might be worth it though.
Antares
macrumors 68000
You're a brave man, letting your ex and current girlfriend cohabitate.
That..or he's a genius.
Anyway, it's quite incredible how you handled the situation. My hat off to you, sir. I don't know if I could ever go as far as you did in being so nice, after all that.
carbonmotion
macrumors 6502a
That..or he's a genius.
Anyway, it's quite incredible how you handled the situation. My hat off to you, sir. I don't know if I could ever go as far as you did in being so nice, after all that.
lol... well my girlfriend's a lovely and understanding person... but as with all women i know, she feels too uncomfortable that another girl is prancing around my place in a tank top and panties for a week with me living there as well. this actually proactively solves that problem before all that bad feeling in the gf gets vented and she starts voicing her displeasure in a vocal/ bitchy manner. and... i really need some private time to myself after spending a long time abroad and then coming home to this drama.
halo 3 time
letsgorangers
macrumors 6502
then he'd have two ex girlfriends
carbonmotion
macrumors 6502a
(1) nonsense!! clearly, she should be the one paying me, if we had sex
(2) i'm pretty sure doing that would leave me feeling dirty in a way that axe body wash can't fix.
(3) im sure i'd end up with two ex-girlfriends and zero girlfriend and get kicked in the balls if i did that.
actually i wonder what my gf and xgf are talking about right now. i hope its about me and how great i am in bed.
lol. jk jk!letsgorangers
macrumors 6502
if they are doing anything other than ripping each other's throats out, consider yourself lucky hahaactually i wonder what my gf and xgf are talking about right now. i hope its about me and how great i am in bed.
Butthead
macrumors 6502
If she's rich, good looking, and not totally mental; I wouldn't mind having your ex prancing around in her bra and panties with me, lol why didn't you ask for my help
?My trouble is no matter if they are rich or poor, they always tend to be mentally unbalanced in one way or another, if not just usual high-maintenance, stress inducing women.
(1) nonsense!! clearly, she should be the one paying me, if we had sex
(2) i'm pretty sure doing that would leave me feeling dirty in a way that axe body wash can't fix.
(3) im sure i'd end up with two ex-girlfriends and zero girlfriend and get kicked in the balls if i did that.
actually i wonder what my gf and xgf are talking about right now. i hope its about me and how great i am in bed.
No good deed goes unpunished, lol
Becareful what you wish for, you might just get it. They both may be comparing notes and both may dump you, saying how you are such a gentleman but just not that 'thrill', the 'excitement', the humor, the intelligence (never mind they are lacking in those depts themselves), blah, blah, blah that women claim they want.