I can agree with you in that it was probally partly my fault. Many times the cable has been bent at the point where it frayed. But still the cable should be built so it does not do this after 1 year.
Plase don't take my comment as putting blame on you. I totally agree with your viewpoint. These are portable devices, and portable devices, no matter how well they are taken care of, end up taking some inevitable rough use. And plenty of other hardware manufacturers seem to manage building their hardware to withstand the occasional power-cord-stretch here and there without bursting into flame.
Apple really does need to consider sacrificing visual aesthetics for safety on this one. I realize Steve Jobs is a nut about industrial design, but I really don't care that much if my magsafe connector has clean lines from a design standpoint. I'd much rather have an "ugly" connector and not see pictures like this, and worry about how safe it is to keep my MBP connected when I'm away from it.
Apple might also consider making the MagSafe connector just a little less magnetic, enough so that if the pull and strain on the cord is a bit much, it gives way. Isn't that what MagSafe is supposed to do anyway? The magnet on my connector is pretty strong and requires more force, IMO, than a regular connector does to disconnect. This seems to defeat the whole purpose.
My suggestion was merely a way, in the absence of Apple doing anything, to make people mindful of what is likely going on, and how they might be able to mitigate the risk.