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Just an update. I called the AT&T number 1.800.331.0500 and went through the command prompts to activate the phone. It took less than five minutes and I didn't have to speak to anyone.

I just wanted to confirm that this was the fix for me as well.

iTunes and my 4S were not interested in displaying any kind of activation options for me. I finally gave up and called CS, right after entering my phone number it said I had a phone that needed to be activated. I followed the prompts and was up and running immediately, no activating on the phone or in iTunes required!
 
I'm in the same boat as a lot of people and it's very confusing. I am on AT&T

I ordered a 4S thru apple which arrived today. Last night I shut down my 3GS and removed the sim card (I shipped it off today so I no longer have the 3GS). Today when I got the 4S, I started it up and went through the initial setup. I selected my wifi network and completed the setup but at no point did it say anything about activation. I connected it to iTunes (Win7) and I set it up as a new phone - perhaps that was a mistake. I got my apps/music re-loaded but it always says "No Service" at the top left. So I'm not going on 8 hours with no phone service.

I keep seeing people say they keep trying to activate over and over. How do you do that? I have no idea how to force the phone to go back through the setup. And I've seen nothing in iTunes that says how to activate the phone. My last 2 iPhones activated as soon as I plugged into iTunes so there were no extra steps required. Can someone give me some guidance on how to force activation - either thru the phone or in iTunes? Thanks!
 
I called the number -- I can't find any way through the menu that allows you to activate automatically. Everything keeps dumping me to a "please hold for a CSR."

This is total crap.
 
Folks, didn't you get the quick start guide with your phone? I did. Followed it and all went fine.

Charge phone if needed.

Plug into iTunes and follow directions.

When iTunes is done, go to ATT activation site (obviously not if it's a Verizon or Sprint phone) and follow directions.

Turn phone off.

Turn back on. Try a call.

Done.
 
Folks, didn't you get the quick start guide with your phone? I did. Followed it and all went fine.

Charge phone if needed.

Plug into iTunes and follow directions.

When iTunes is done, go to ATT activation site (obviously not if it's a Verizon or Sprint phone) and follow directions.

Turn phone off.

Turn back on. Try a call.

Done.

I got them... and they were useless.

Charged phone

Plugged into iTunes

Not presented with any kind of activation screen.

Went to the website where I tired to activate and was told it had to be done through iTunes

Got frustrated tried restoring and setting up as new a few times

Eventually gave up and called at&t which for the first time ever was helpful... probably only since I didn't have to talk to a rep.
 
The new line that i open for my brother activated in less then 5 mins, followed the on screen instructions through the phone, didnt have to call or connect to itunes... wow not bad.... now i need to see how to activate my personal phone which is a upgrade from 3gs...lets see how this goes.
 
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