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OMFG, I Think I Just Made Nerd History!!!
- Thread starter ghall
- Start date
- Sort by reaction score
Try to get the good out of this...
If you feel you have disappointed her, find (not make up) a plausible reason why you were unable to attend, and apologize graciously. Ask her if there were pictures made, and if another event is planned. She'll be OK, and you don't have to beat yourself up!
It is probably best, I still believe, to consider her previous responses to be a very polite, minimally insulting, "no." She may have declined, but she didn't brutally shoot you down, so she may feel kindly toward you. If she has a heart at all, she'll be flattered at your interest, and, if she has any class at all, she'll treat you well socially from now on.
This does not necessarily mean that you "have a chance" with her. These things can be beyond your control and beyond hers as well. But if this enormous outpouring of support for you on this forum means anything it means that folks here find you interesting, charming, funny, and popular! We can't all be wrong (except Mad Jew)!
Only you can decide if all the fashion and presentation advice applies to your case. Like I said, if you call yourself a "nerd," it might! Everybody everywhere will tell you things like, "if you apply for a job, dress like you already work there." I would argue that the same is true for your hot date -- you need to dress and hold yourself like you belong with her before she, and her friends, will consider that you could.
Like I said, too -- you're a great guy and have great prospects beyond this girl. If you finally lose out on her, you just have to shake it off and carry on. College is better!
PS: You need to do a little self-examination and figure out why you actually didn't go to the show. It sounds like your confidence just failed you -- but you can't squander your bold opening moves by dilly-dallying later!
If you feel you have disappointed her, find (not make up) a plausible reason why you were unable to attend, and apologize graciously. Ask her if there were pictures made, and if another event is planned. She'll be OK, and you don't have to beat yourself up!
It is probably best, I still believe, to consider her previous responses to be a very polite, minimally insulting, "no." She may have declined, but she didn't brutally shoot you down, so she may feel kindly toward you. If she has a heart at all, she'll be flattered at your interest, and, if she has any class at all, she'll treat you well socially from now on.
This does not necessarily mean that you "have a chance" with her. These things can be beyond your control and beyond hers as well. But if this enormous outpouring of support for you on this forum means anything it means that folks here find you interesting, charming, funny, and popular! We can't all be wrong (except Mad Jew)!
Only you can decide if all the fashion and presentation advice applies to your case. Like I said, if you call yourself a "nerd," it might! Everybody everywhere will tell you things like, "if you apply for a job, dress like you already work there." I would argue that the same is true for your hot date -- you need to dress and hold yourself like you belong with her before she, and her friends, will consider that you could.
Like I said, too -- you're a great guy and have great prospects beyond this girl. If you finally lose out on her, you just have to shake it off and carry on. College is better!
PS: You need to do a little self-examination and figure out why you actually didn't go to the show. It sounds like your confidence just failed you -- but you can't squander your bold opening moves by dilly-dallying later!
Iscariot
macrumors 68030
nickster9224
macrumors 6502a
zap2
macrumors 604
call...notes seem like your avoiding her.
Also don't text, and if she doesn't pick up, leave a message telling her you'd like to talk. Don't tell her everything you plan to on the message.
shecky
Guest
of course she is mad at you, you dropped the ball on her (theoretical) flirtationings!!! so the question is how are you gonna pick the ball back up and run it all the way in for a touchdown and do a little dance and then get into the draft 1st pick and then be in a Nike commercial?????
but enough sports analogies. i think it would be mighty ballsy of you to go past just a note and right into something more agressive. what do you have to loose anyway? walk up to her with 2 tickets to a play/concert/something interesting, tell her you are sorry and you want to make it up to her.
i triple dog dare you.
but enough sports analogies. i think it would be mighty ballsy of you to go past just a note and right into something more agressive. what do you have to loose anyway? walk up to her with 2 tickets to a play/concert/something interesting, tell her you are sorry and you want to make it up to her.
i triple dog dare you.
awwwww G! big time bummer 🙁 well, at least you now know if she was kidding or not b/c it's obvious she wasn't and was hoping you were there.
the damage is done. try to talk to her, but speak to her directly...none of this text bs. or if you do text, tell her you can explain.
unfortunately, you might have screwed yourself. who knows though...women are weird....she might be fine with it in a few days 🙂
you could buy her a single rose to show you do care...just an idea.
good luck,
Keebler
iBlue
macrumors Core
(just read most recent update)
She sounds like a high-maintenance stuck up little bitch, quite frankly. (sorry)
First off, if a girl is interested they usually don't do the whole "I'll tell you later" thing. (unless there is something big about to happen. under the circumstances, I don't believe this is the case)
Secondly, if she is being completely unreasonable about you not MacGyver-ing your way into her ambiguous instructions to get into her fashion show ( 🙄 btw ) then she's, well, being unreasonable and childish. If she can't understand something as simple as this, then she's likely going to be more trouble than she's worth. Hell, for that matter, she won't even let you explain. What. A. Brat.
Just my two pennies but I think you ought not waste your time on this one. Even if she is actually interested, she's likely to be quite irritating.
She sounds like a high-maintenance stuck up little bitch, quite frankly. (sorry)
First off, if a girl is interested they usually don't do the whole "I'll tell you later" thing. (unless there is something big about to happen. under the circumstances, I don't believe this is the case)
Secondly, if she is being completely unreasonable about you not MacGyver-ing your way into her ambiguous instructions to get into her fashion show ( 🙄 btw ) then she's, well, being unreasonable and childish. If she can't understand something as simple as this, then she's likely going to be more trouble than she's worth. Hell, for that matter, she won't even let you explain. What. A. Brat.
Just my two pennies but I think you ought not waste your time on this one. Even if she is actually interested, she's likely to be quite irritating.
ravenvii
macrumors 604
Dude, I'm sorry but I had to drop in.
You have a major, MAJOR case of one-itis! Forget her. Like they say, there are many more in the sea.
Confront her and explain your stuff if that clears your conscience or something, but drop her like a bad habit. You got the guts to ask her out, now go and use that new-found guts to go after other girls! You'll find girls way better than that biatch. Even more, you're only in high school aren't you? Once you get into college you'll realize high school means ****. Less than ****, to speak the truth.
Cure your one-itis and go after other chicks!
You have a major, MAJOR case of one-itis! Forget her. Like they say, there are many more in the sea.
Confront her and explain your stuff if that clears your conscience or something, but drop her like a bad habit. You got the guts to ask her out, now go and use that new-found guts to go after other girls! You'll find girls way better than that biatch. Even more, you're only in high school aren't you? Once you get into college you'll realize high school means ****. Less than ****, to speak the truth.
Cure your one-itis and go after other chicks!
Kamera RAWr
macrumors 65816
There's always more than one girl out there than you can get on well with. If you can, find the strength to just forget about her in any romantic way and move on. Thats your best move. There are a great many attractive and intelligent girls out there.
This Buds for you 🙂
This Buds for you 🙂
I disagree with a lot of the advice given. I wonder if most of the advice is by single or older people...??
I'm 23 and in college and have had tons of chicks (I realize it's ghey to brag about your sex life on an internet forum...so I'll just stop there.)
Do NOT call her. You didn't let her down...she didn't even tell you where the hell it was!! It was a polite way of telling you she wasn't interested.
She is ignoring you now because she feels akward around you.
Honestly, your "friendship" will never be the same because she will always feel like you are oogling her and will always want something more than a friend.
It seems like it's the end of the world, but you have all your eggs in one basket. Be yourself, stay confident, keep it classy.
I was like 215 lbs when I was a freshman in high school. I started playing football and working out. Minimized fast food/soda - and dropped 40 lbs and that gave me the confidence I lacked.
If that doesn't work, check out craigslist - a place where a one-eyed leopard could get laid.
I'm 23 and in college and have had tons of chicks (I realize it's ghey to brag about your sex life on an internet forum...so I'll just stop there.)
Do NOT call her. You didn't let her down...she didn't even tell you where the hell it was!! It was a polite way of telling you she wasn't interested.
She is ignoring you now because she feels akward around you.
Honestly, your "friendship" will never be the same because she will always feel like you are oogling her and will always want something more than a friend.
It seems like it's the end of the world, but you have all your eggs in one basket. Be yourself, stay confident, keep it classy.
I was like 215 lbs when I was a freshman in high school. I started playing football and working out. Minimized fast food/soda - and dropped 40 lbs and that gave me the confidence I lacked.
If that doesn't work, check out craigslist - a place where a one-eyed leopard could get laid.
I agree G....if you were friends before then she will come around. If not, so be it. Work on yourself and the rest will just come. Really. You're a great guy, now you just need to see that yourself.
Good luck.
Ok, I have to drop soem of my experience and wisdom on you. Too bad I missed the thread until now!
First of all, I am (was?) a nerd/geek. Second, I always dated super hot girl: one was a porn actress, a few models and a lot of hot chicks. Looking at pictures of me back then I know it wasnt because of my look: I looked like crap (at least compared to now).
The reason I got all these girls was because I had total confidence in my capacity to entertain these girls. I knew I was someone interesting and funny and that is generaly what girls want. And that is also what you should aim for, a pretty girls who isnt funny is a waste of time.
So the moral of this is not that you should be funny, but that you should have confidence in yourself. Trust me, that is the thing girls crave for. After that, just try to find out what interest the girl and let her talk about it, asking intelligent questions once in a while and that is it!
I have learn a lot from my various experiences and I dont have time to write it all down now, so the only thing you should remember from this is that confidence is the most important thing because it will determine how you present yourself in front of others.
Confidence also means that if it doesnt work with a girl, dont ever start to beg or lower yourself. It would totaly destroy the "confidence" impression the girl had of you and she will lose all her respect for you. You better just say that it is too bad that she isnt interested because you saw something in her, and then move on. The hotter the girl, the more this will thraumatise (sp?) her because she would be used to see guys bend in half for her, and she will either eventualy come back to you or gain a lot of respect toward you. In both case, you win 🙂
My friends never understood why my success rate in bars was so high, I always managed to get phone numbers. The trick was to never ask the girl for it! When it was time to leave, I would simply say that I really liked to talk to her and hoped to see her again. Most of the time, she would be the one giving me her number and if not, the next time we met she would be the one coming to see me.
Finaly, all the usual stuff still hold true: smell good, be clean, wear cloths that fit you well (notice that I am not talking about being a fashion victim), respect the girl, be funny, interesting and able to articulate your ideas.
Hope some of these hints help you! It surely helped me to get my lovely wife! 😎
First of all, I am (was?) a nerd/geek. Second, I always dated super hot girl: one was a porn actress, a few models and a lot of hot chicks. Looking at pictures of me back then I know it wasnt because of my look: I looked like crap (at least compared to now).
The reason I got all these girls was because I had total confidence in my capacity to entertain these girls. I knew I was someone interesting and funny and that is generaly what girls want. And that is also what you should aim for, a pretty girls who isnt funny is a waste of time.
So the moral of this is not that you should be funny, but that you should have confidence in yourself. Trust me, that is the thing girls crave for. After that, just try to find out what interest the girl and let her talk about it, asking intelligent questions once in a while and that is it!
I have learn a lot from my various experiences and I dont have time to write it all down now, so the only thing you should remember from this is that confidence is the most important thing because it will determine how you present yourself in front of others.
Confidence also means that if it doesnt work with a girl, dont ever start to beg or lower yourself. It would totaly destroy the "confidence" impression the girl had of you and she will lose all her respect for you. You better just say that it is too bad that she isnt interested because you saw something in her, and then move on. The hotter the girl, the more this will thraumatise (sp?) her because she would be used to see guys bend in half for her, and she will either eventualy come back to you or gain a lot of respect toward you. In both case, you win 🙂
My friends never understood why my success rate in bars was so high, I always managed to get phone numbers. The trick was to never ask the girl for it! When it was time to leave, I would simply say that I really liked to talk to her and hoped to see her again. Most of the time, she would be the one giving me her number and if not, the next time we met she would be the one coming to see me.
Finaly, all the usual stuff still hold true: smell good, be clean, wear cloths that fit you well (notice that I am not talking about being a fashion victim), respect the girl, be funny, interesting and able to articulate your ideas.
Hope some of these hints help you! It surely helped me to get my lovely wife! 😎
ricgnzlzcr
macrumors 6502a
Thank you. I didn't know other people used that term but it's something I can't emphasize to all the kids in college. Dabble around and eventually a good one will come to you. You don't know how much that helped me after I learned not to obsess over one girl in early high school. Good luck mate.