I am 51. My wife is 56. The city still very much holds its attraction for us.That said, being around 50 years old plays pretty heavily into preferences. The noise and energy of cities has become less attractive as I’ve aged.
I am 51. My wife is 56. The city still very much holds its attraction for us.That said, being around 50 years old plays pretty heavily into preferences. The noise and energy of cities has become less attractive as I’ve aged.
To be fair to most of the pro-rural types in this thread that advocate getting away from crowds and noise, etc., I am what some might classify as 'empathetic'. That is, I derive some of my internal energy from the energy around me. I have always enjoyed going to places where there are crowds (which is why I always liked malls) and 'feeling' the energy of people doing things and being out and about. It's a reason I visit coffee shops as well.@eyoungren It's very interesting to hear the opposite perspective for once. I always feel like I'm the only one who doesn't get it as pretty much everybody around me is talking about rural living as if it was the epitome of human existence, and I feel left out and somewhat alienated sometimes. The issues you mentioned are exactly what pops into my head first when I think about living in the countryside. My head immediately goes to all these potential problems whereas most other people do not seem to see them as such.
I never had a problem with those rural people who moved far enough out to escape the boundary limits of certain laws. No, my problems were always with those families (and it was families, not just certain people) that believed that the law didn't apply to them or that simply weren't concerned about enforcement.This is my plan main reasons: I can retire at 37, Starlink and 5G allows for excellent download speeds anywhere, No government interference with my life (I can run non-catted cars or fire guns in my backyard and don't have to worry about a Karen neighbor calling the city), Airports are everywhere and flights are cheap I can choose to go to LA NYC or Chicago whenever I choose for food or shopping and still pay way less than rent would be in those cities.
I have quite a few contacts in Arkansas. And although I don’t disagree with what you said, I can also point out the downside, is I’ve heard the mosquitoes are atrocious, the heat alone can exceed over 100° making it unbearable for various months, and there’s quite a bit of poverty in Arkansas, which is why there’s cheaper cost of living. But I do agree with the southern hospitality , being somebody that lived in East-Tennessee for years.I was born and raised in the SF Bay Area. Native Californian. When my wife and I retired in 2018, we bailed out. For good. High taxes, cost of living, Politics, you name it, drove us out.
We bought a home in NW Arkansas, the Ozarks. We haven't looked back, not for one second.
The crime rate here is non-existent, no spray painted graffiti anywhere. The people here are
very down to earth and friendly. That phrase "Southern Hospitality" is true. The air is clean, no smog, you can actually see stars at night. A great place to raise kids if you have a young family.
I miss California, especially the beaches. But I left, looking for a better place to live and enjoy life. So far I'd say I (we) made the right decision.
This is something I've experienced ever since moving to the US a little over six years ago, and I feel it's happening more and more frequently.
I'm at a party or other social event, making small talk with friends of friends and almost every time I am at one of these social gatherings someone proudly exclaims that they have just purchased a tract of land, somewhere between 5-15 acres, somewhere out in the boonies in the middle of nowhere at least an hour or two away from the city. They plan to build a house there and move out once they're retired, they're old, the kids are in college, etc. pp. It's always the exact same spiel. Mind you, this is not coming from people trying to escape an inner-city apartment in overpopulated urban areas such as San Francisco, Chicago, or New York but people already living in what can only be described as suburbian mansions 20-30 minutes away from the city.
Whenever I ask people why the response is always along the lines of "I don't want to grow old in the city" or "I want to escape city life" or "I want more land". As someone who has lived either directly in or in the suburbs of big cities my entire life (the smallest city I have lived in was Detroit, with a population of around 640,000) this is something I find impossible to understand. Why would I want to escape the benefits of cities, especially if I already live out in the comfort of suburbia? Why would I want 10 acres of land? Why would I want to drive 20 minutes or more to the next grocery store, 30 minutes or more to the next hardware store, or an hour or more to the next medical facility (especially if I am going to need the latter much more frequently as I grow older)?
What am I missing? Is this a cultural thing deeply engrained in the American mindset that oen must own land and that I as a foreigner that wasn't raised in this country simply cannot understand? Have I not been exposed to my fellow citizens long enough to develop the deep misanthropic hatred that would drive me out to the middle of nowhere? I honestly am completely flabbergasted and lost as to why this seems to be the norm rather than the exception around here.
Has someone here done this recently and if so, can you help me understand?
Results: Life expectancy was inversely related to levels of rurality. In 2005-2009, those in large metropolitan areas had a life expectancy of 79.1 years, compared with 76.9 years in small urban towns and 76.7 years in rural areas.
Healthcare is a valid concern when you are rural I bought some land about 2hrs from DC and about 45 minutes from a Trader Joes and Whole Foods. I should be able to eat healthy and have access to world class healthcare the only big drawback is immediate care I would need a life flight for anything really serious that popped up unexpectedly. Less stress though should in theory extend my life but who knows its all a gamble.![]()
Widening rural-urban disparities in life expectancy, U.S., 1969-2009 - PubMed
Between 1969 and 2009, residents in metropolitan areas experienced larger gains in life expectancy than those in nonmetropolitan areas, contributing to the widening gap.pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
and the disparity is growing. Access to healthcare drives a lot of it.
But then, in the boonies, strangers are less likely to relieve themselves outside your front door. Depends on your priorities, I guess….
And the McMansion living you’re describing isn’t really city living. You can’t walk to dinner, but you still have to hear the neighbors’ parties and please the HOA. I suspect the people you’re describing may have preferred rural living all along but compromised on the suburbs because that’s where the better schools are for their kids. Moving to the boonies is the dream that keeps them going until they can finally exit the rat race.
I'd say your experience has many dimensions to it. I don't think there is a simple, all encompassing answer but a lot of the beliefs, values, and emotions that drive Americans' geographic preferences are both deeply rooted in American culture and mythology as well as in societal changes in the United States from the mid 1960s to the present.I honestly am completely flabbergasted and lost as to why this seems to be the norm rather than the exception around here.
A question:This is something I've experienced ever since moving to the US a little over six years ago, and I feel it's happening more and more frequently.
I'm at a party or other social event, making small talk with friends of friends and almost every time I am at one of these social gatherings someone proudly exclaims that they have just purchased a tract of land, somewhere between 5-15 acres, somewhere out in the boonies in the middle of nowhere at least an hour or two away from the city. They plan to build a house there and move out once they're retired, they're old, the kids are in college, etc. pp. It's always the exact same spiel. Mind you, this is not coming from people trying to escape an inner-city apartment in overpopulated urban areas such as San Francisco, Chicago, or New York but people already living in what can only be described as suburbian mansions 20-30 minutes away from the city.
Whenever I ask people why the response is always along the lines of "I don't want to grow old in the city" or "I want to escape city life" or "I want more land". As someone who has lived either directly in or in the suburbs of big cities my entire life (the smallest city I have lived in was Detroit, with a population of around 640,000) this is something I find impossible to understand. Why would I want to escape the benefits of cities, especially if I already live out in the comfort of suburbia? Why would I want 10 acres of land? Why would I want to drive 20 minutes or more to the next grocery store, 30 minutes or more to the next hardware store, or an hour or more to the next medical facility (especially if I am going to need the latter much more frequently as I grow older)?
What am I missing? Is this a cultural thing deeply engrained in the American mindset that oen must own land and that I as a foreigner that wasn't raised in this country simply cannot understand? Have I not been exposed to my fellow citizens long enough to develop the deep misanthropic hatred that would drive me out to the middle of nowhere? I honestly am completely flabbergasted and lost as to why this seems to be the norm rather than the exception around here.
Has someone here done this recently and if so, can you help me understand?
I can see this. I'm a runner, hiker and backpacker who loves to hide in the outdoors, while my wife's idea of camping is staying at a hotel without a hair dryer. She would be very unhappy with rural living, while I would probably do okay with it. The good news for her is I'm not interested in what I would call "deep rural" living.A question:
Is this "someone" - or are these "someones" - (who announce this purchase) male or female?
I've known people (sometimes, educated professional people with extremely good careers) who - when they approached retirement - stated that they wished to do this - and, who actually did do this, but, they were almost exclusively male.
By way of marked - and striking - contrast, in my experience, their wives suffered/endured/barely tolerated (and sometimes loathed) this change to arcadian rural bliss.
I suppose then it comes down to how one defines 'better'.He says he spends less to live better.
My inlaws did exactly that, and years ago they bought a large-ish property they moved to when they retired. They used to live in a typical suburban house, now their house is larger and newer, they have their own private lake to fish, a few acres to play farmer on and grow their own veggies, an orchard, there's a local population of deer in their forest, they have their own makeshift shooting range for plinking, property taxes are much lower than where they lived before... The list goes on. They are not city people so for them –jobs aside– there's many downsides to living in a city, and now they are retired so that's doesn't matter anymore. Medical services is a factor to consider, definitely, but their attitude in that regard is that they'll cross that bridge when they get there, and they probably have a good 10 years before they have to worry about that. If it was just a small house and a small yard like they used to have in the city it might be different, but they have built an amazing place over the years, so why would they want to stay in a city? To be 10 minutes away from the local Walmart? They are retired, so they can easily do all their grocery shopping in a longer half-day escapade and be done for a couple of weeks. For shopping, 1hr drive in the countryside vs 1/2 hr drive with traffic seems like an improvement when they have nothing else to do with their time to be honest. Different strokes and all that.This is something I've experienced ever since moving to the US a little over six years ago, and I feel it's happening more and more frequently.
I'm at a party or other social event, making small talk with friends of friends and almost every time I am at one of these social gatherings someone proudly exclaims that they have just purchased a tract of land, somewhere between 5-15 acres, somewhere out in the boonies in the middle of nowhere at least an hour or two away from the city. They plan to build a house there and move out once they're retired, they're old, the kids are in college, etc. pp. It's always the exact same spiel. Mind you, this is not coming from people trying to escape an inner-city apartment in overpopulated urban areas such as San Francisco, Chicago, or New York but people already living in what can only be described as suburbian mansions 20-30 minutes away from the city.
Whenever I ask people why the response is always along the lines of "I don't want to grow old in the city" or "I want to escape city life" or "I want more land". As someone who has lived either directly in or in the suburbs of big cities my entire life (the smallest city I have lived in was Detroit, with a population of around 640,000) this is something I find impossible to understand. Why would I want to escape the benefits of cities, especially if I already live out in the comfort of suburbia? Why would I want 10 acres of land? Why would I want to drive 20 minutes or more to the next grocery store, 30 minutes or more to the next hardware store, or an hour or more to the next medical facility (especially if I am going to need the latter much more frequently as I grow older)?
What am I missing? Is this a cultural thing deeply engrained in the American mindset that oen must own land and that I as a foreigner that wasn't raised in this country simply cannot understand? Have I not been exposed to my fellow citizens long enough to develop the deep misanthropic hatred that would drive me out to the middle of nowhere? I honestly am completely flabbergasted and lost as to why this seems to be the norm rather than the exception around here.
Has someone here done this recently and if so, can you help me understand?
That is an excellent question that I have not yet contemplated. Thinking about it I have to say it's both with a heavy bias on the male side. I know of at least two females that can't or couldn't wait to escape suburbia for a more peaceful and hassle-free (re: no people) life in the countryside. One that grew up and lived in cities and suburbs all around the world her entire life and has already moved out (aforementioned neighbors/friends that now live an hour away) and one that grew up in the countryside in upstate New York and only moved to the city for college and later work. Other than that it's exclusively men. That is a very interesting observation.Is this "someone" - or are these "someones" - (who announce this purchase) male or female?
I thought about that as well, and I think you're absolutely right. 20-year old me would probably hate it.LOL, from the perspective of a lot of city dwellers, you've already moved to the "boonies"......so why did you move to the suburbs?
That is an interesting statement, as it is one that I keep hearing over and over again. What is it about people that you are fed up with? Is it specific people that drive you up the walls? Is it the sheer number of people you are surrounded by, and if so how and why?But having lived my entire life putting up with people, I am now fed up and would certainly be open to living without people being so close for a change (if only in my dreams).
It's not the number of people -- it's more their nature when living in a densely populated city. Either people have gotten less considerate over time or my tolerance is wearing thin the older I get (or some combination).That is an interesting statement, as it is one that I keep hearing over and over again. What is it about people that you are fed up with? Is it specific people that drive you up the walls? Is it the sheer number of people you are surrounded by, and if so how and why?
My point, explicitly, is that this is about me… my aging. I do not speak for anybody else…I am 51. My wife is 56. The city still very much holds its attraction for us.
In my experience, this desire, or marked preference (for rural bliss) is almost exclusively male.That is an excellent question that I have not yet contemplated. Thinking about it I have to say it's both with a heavy bias on the male side. I know of at least two females that can't or couldn't wait to escape suburbia for a more peaceful and hassle-free (re: no people) life in the countryside. One that grew up and lived in cities and suburbs all around the world her entire life and has already moved out (aforementioned neighbors/friends that now live an hour away) and one that grew up in the countryside in upstate New York and only moved to the city for college and later work. Other than that it's exclusively men. That is a very interesting observation.
That is an interesting statement, as it is one that I keep hearing over and over again. What is it about people that you are fed up with? Is it specific people that drive you up the walls? Is it the sheer number of people you are surrounded by, and if so how and why?
A couple of social science-related factors that also may have an effect, IMHO:In my experience, this desire, or marked preference (for rural bliss) is almost exclusively male.