Sexual Orientation

[feelthefire]

Well, I guess I'm straight. I'm in a relationship with a really wonderful guy.

I've always preferred men, but the best way I can explain it is that while I don't seek out women for relationships, sexual or otherwise, I don't feel an aversion to them. I have been with women before, and while it was fun...there has never been anything approaching the level of connection I can develop with someone of the opposite sex.

So, I consider myself straight. I can find myself attracted to women, but only in the sense that there's an absence of negative feelings about the idea, instead of strong positive inclinations towards that situation.

This is of great interest to my current guy, of course

 

[richard.mac]

Well, I guess I'm straight. I'm in a relationship with a really wonderful guy.

I've always preferred men, but the best way I can explain it is that while I don't seek out women for relationships, sexual or otherwise, I don't feel an aversion to them. I have been with women before, and while it was fun...there has never been anything approaching the level of connection I can develop with someone of the opposite sex.

So, I consider myself straight. I can find myself attracted to women, but only in the sense that there's an absence of negative feelings about the idea, instead of strong positive inclinations towards that situation.

This is of great interest to my current guy, of course

is this becuase Women know how to please another Women more than Men do? is this how you feel? like sometimes you want your desires to be fulfilled but then you still have a sexual attration to Men? is any truth behind this? im curious.

 

[Mord]

is this becuase Women know how to please another Women more than Men do? is this how you feel? like sometimes you want your desires to be fulfilled but then you still have a sexual attration to Men? is any truth behind this? im curious.

I wouldn't say that lesbians are much more intrinsically knowledgeable than men, they're just far more willing to experiment, what works for one woman likely won't for the next and for things to really take off a fair amount of trial and error needs to happen. The average man will just think that it's all down to the size of his cock when the reality of the situation is that a good lover is simply one who's open minded and willing to try things out.

 

[feelthefire]

is this becuase Women know how to please another Women more than Men do? is this how you feel? like sometimes you want your desires to be fulfilled but then you still have a sexual attration to Men? is any truth behind this? im curious.

Not really. If you're a woman, there isn't a lot of challenge in being with another woman. You do what you like and that generally puts you pretty far ahead. For me at least, it lacks the sense of exploration and bonding that I find in heterosexual relationships, which is why I don't consider myself to be bisexual. I've found that while I can appreciate an attractive woman, I can't relate to her on the level required to truly have an attraction, if that makes any sense.

For what it's worth, and I hope this isn't going too far, I find being with men more satisfying because it also satisfies an emotional need. Satisfying a physical need is great but in the end, that just isn't the whole picture.

 

[DarkHeraldMage]

is this becuase Women know how to please another Women more than Men do? is this how you feel? like sometimes you want your desires to be fulfilled but then you still have a sexual attration to Men? is any truth behind this? im curious.

I believe that in some senses it is. I've fooled around with a couple straight male friends, and they've each eventually told me that it was better than anything they'd had before. I say this not to brag, but to emphasize a point (and trying not to be too graphic in the process).

My experiences in the past have been that I know what pleases me, and with men it's a little easier to carry it over to the next guy. I know the spots and the timing and so forth, and it just works. Plus, I think there's something to be said about enjoying what you do. It may not even be so much that everything is exactly like they like it, but more that there is emphasis and enjoyment in the act. Typically speaking, most women do not enjoy certain sexual acts that gay men find enjoyable, so if they do consent to doing it they're not going to enjoy it.

Just my two cents. Feel free to post your own experiences and/or opinions.

 

[feelthefire]

I believe that in some senses it is. I've fooled around with a couple male friends, and they've each eventually told me that it was better than anything they'd had before. I say this not to brag, but to emphasize a point (and trying not to be too graphic in the process).

My experiences in the past have been that I know what pleases me, and with men it's a little easier to carry it over to the next guy. I know the spots and the timing and so forth, and it just works. Plus, I think there's something to be said about enjoying what you do. It may not even be so much that everything is exactly like they like it, but more that there is emphasis and enjoyment in the act. Typically speaking, most women do not enjoy certain sexual acts that gay men find enjoyable, so if they do consent to doing it they're not going to enjoy it.

Just my two cents. Feel free to post your own experiences and/or opinions.

While in some senses this is true, I don't think it really explains my attraction to women, which is what the original asker of the question was getting at. I didn't know this about sexual interaction with the same sex until AFTER I'd done it.

Is it easier? yes. You're working with someone whose body is similar to your own. Every person is slightly different but you start in a different place since you're both operating with the same "equipment."

There are some negatives. I find that, because I'm a woman and I know my own behavior, I can tell when a female partner is feigning interest or not enjoying herself, which can be a downer. There is more pressure to "get it right" because you're working with something you're supposed to understand well. There is also a lack of "exploration" because there are always the default buttons that you know will work to at least some degree. In that sense I find sex with someone of the same sex to be less intimate. I don't bond as well as I do with someone of the opposite sex.

There are pluses and minuses to every situation. These are the conclusions that have led me to believe my preferences are straight, despite the fact that I can appreciate and be attracted to women. I relate better on a sexual level to men, despite any sexual attraction I might have to a woman.