Starting College and Terrified

[toolbox]

I have issues with being in big crowds also, mine is different because i am worried i am going to run into someone that might invite me out to a party, or because of my eye problem i might run into someone and knock them over

I was not a outgoing person at all. Now that i am on medication i am not standing up for my self if there is problems at work, or getting involved in more conversations at work then i was before. I would sit in meetings and not say a word. I am sleeping better and eating a lot more then what i did. being anxious all the time made me feel sick and not wanting to eat.

 

[TheAnswer]

I meant lost in the crowd, I don't stand up for myself very well. I'm pretty meek actually, and if you've seen pictures of me you'd probably be surprised.

Well, I don't think that will be as much as an issue as it would be in high school. As far as classroom situations:

1. Volunteer when you know an answer, that way you won't get stressed about being called on when you don't know.

2. For speeches or presentations, volunteer to go first. That way you get it out of the way and can relax the rest of the class.

Also, Professors usually offer office hours, this is a great opportunity to express your knowledge/interest in the subject to the professor without the stress of speaking in front of the rest of the group.

Hope this helps.

Now since it's 1AM, you probably need to turn off the computer/tv/bright lights, take a series of slow deep breaths and get your body ready for sleep.

 

[ghall]

Wow, that's a bit harder. I'm a natural outgoing person, I believe, but I know it's harder to get that way if you aren't born with it, as evidenced by my siblings. But it really takes some more serious effort to reach out and meet people, who can experience first-hand the same things you're going though. I've met a lot of great people during my quarters of college as a HS student. It really wasn't hard for me, but I can't speak for you.

Well meeting people isn't a problem, I just get lost in the system very easily. The only reason I made it through high school was because I went to an alternative high school where we could actually get to know the teachers because the classes were so small, and I'm a lot more outgoing once I get to know someone, so it was a lot easier to speak up. But even in middle school I would never speak up if I needed to, I'd just kind of sit there trying to make myself do it but being unable to, except to partially raise my hand.

 

[toolbox]

But even in middle school I would never speak up if I needed to, I'd just kind of sit there trying to make myself do it but being unable to.

I was the same also, to terrified to ask questions.

 

[ghall]

Well i'm finally starting to feel drowsy (about freaking time) so I'm going to try again to get some sleep. I'll let everyone know how I fare tomorrow. Hopefully I'll have good news.

 

[toolbox]

Good luck, just remember if your getting worried take some deep breaths and try and think of something else. That has helped me a few times. Also, there are some sprays out there that you put under your tongue that offer some relief.

 

[Beric]

Well i'm finally starting to feel drowsy (about freaking time) so I'm going to try again to get some sleep. I'll let everyone know how I fare tomorrow. Hopefully I'll have good news.

Heh, I'm dreading tomorrow. Have to get up early and listen to my teacher continue to try force every student to become a vegetarian and hate fast food for the rest of their lives. And my Calc teacher may be give the best lectures I've ever had ever, but I've never flunked a math test so bad. He redefines the definition of a "hard test". I though I was good at math.

Well, off to bed at 10:30 for me. Good luck on tomorrow!

 

[Rodimus Prime]

I read a lot of excuse in there. Like it or not college is the new base line for this world. 30 years ago graduating HS was the base line but that is no longer the rule. A college degree opens a lot of doors that other wise would be kept closed with several locks on it. No matter what you do they will never be opened unless you have a degree.

College is a different world than HS. That class you took in HS is not the real thing hate to break it to you but it was not the real thing. College classes are different. Trick to deal with you problems is go to the teacher/Professors office and get to know them.....

I doute you could get very far with out your degree. Some one with the degree will almost always beat you out. The degree proves you can do what want to do.....

 

[InvalidUserID]

What helped me whenever I found myself nervous or stressed in class was remembering that everyone else in the class feels the exact same way. What used to help me when I would have to do presentations or answer a question is that other people aren't thinking "Oh she's so dumb" or waiting for me to mess up, they are likely thinking about what they'll do later that night or day-dreaming about something else.

Also, while I believe that college is very important, it isn't for everyone. If you feel strongly that it isn't for you, tell your family so. If they really love you and have your best interests in mind, they'll respect your decision. But since you are already there, give it a shot and see how it goes for the first quarter/semester.

 

[NeoMayhem]

I start college tomorrow, and I'm having some trouble. I have posted before that I have anxiety problems (a while ago actually), and I have made lots of progress but it plays a huge part in why I'm scared to go to college.

Of course I have all the normal anxieties of college, I could deal with that if it was all it was. But I have anxieties on top of that, mostly things that are huge deals to me but would seem silly to other people.

I have trouble in certain settings where there are a lot of people, high school was fine for me because it was a small school but college is completely different. It's also literally impossible for me to cross large roads which I will have to do to catch my bus home. I also have a real tough time with corridors, which there are plenty of at the college I'm going to. And those are just the major issues.

Sure they seem minor to most people, but to someone like me, they're the most daunting things in the world.

On top of all that, in my past experience, I just get left in the dust in a college environment. I took a college class in high school and never finished it because I couldn't handle getting lost so easily. And at my college orientation a few weeks ago I had no idea what the hell was going on.

I'm thinking I'm not ready for college but my family won't here it. I suggested that I try again next year, maybe take classes in the mean time so I'm not thrown into the college environment all at once.

Of course, on top of all this I don't even want to go to college. I think it's retarded how I need a stupid piece of paper for people to take me seriously. I'm very passionate about what I do, I'm probably just as good as someone with a college degree. But again, my family is bent on convincing me that I do want to go to college.

I know that's a lot of crazy stuff going through my head but there you have it. I'm really frustrated and lost right now.


PS: This is serious, not a part of my "Ghall Saga". I will ask the mods to delete any comments like "oh no not another one", or anything else non-constructive.

I have a few things for you.

1. Nobody can make you goto college. I was pressured into going, and going somewhere I didn't really want to go and I regret it. Sure, things worked out pretty well, but I still wish I had done what I really wanted to do.

2. There are plenty of good jobs to be had without a degree. You dont need a 'stupid piece of paper' to be successful. Most people who goto college would probably be just as successful if they didn't go. People claim college = success because most successful people choose to go. I would have been just as successful if I didnt go, and most people I know would have as well.

3. If you are not ready, wait a year. College isn't going anywhere. You have the rest of your life to decide to go if you want.

4. This is an amazing part of your life. You need to make sure you do what you want and have a good time. It sounds like you have some good skills, so you should have no problem finding success.

5. It sounds like a lot of your problems would be solved if you went to a smaller, rural school. Where I went, there were no large roads to cross, no large corridors, and things were really quite and simple

6. For the most part, college isnt any harder then high school. It is structured a lot differently, but the same basic rules apply. If you like what you are studying, it should be even easier then high school.

Good Luck

 

[JLatte]

I have a few things for you.

1. Nobody can make you goto college. I was pressured into going, and going somewhere I didn't really want to go and I regret it. Sure, things worked out pretty well, but I still wish I had done what I really wanted to do.

2. There are plenty of good jobs to be had without a degree. You dont need a 'stupid piece of paper' to be successful. Most people who goto college would probably be just as successful if they didn't go. People claim college = success because most successful people choose to go. I would have been just as successful if I didnt go, and most people I know would have as well.

See, I agree with you strongly that if you want to be successful, then you can be. The only problem is that successful people 90% of the time have to work their ass off to get there and not make excuses. OP is making excuses. I actually know several people that have recently gotten hired with a starting salary of somewhere in the upper $60k, which is not bad for not having a degree. Of course this is possible. Did these said people actually apply themselves? Of course they did. For not going to school they overcompensated by teaching themselves what they needed to know and were just very good at what they do.

Waiting for a year is great, at that age you should accomplish something in a year. If taking a year off will help better focus and grow yourself then that's fine. Learn something in a year, work a few jobs, or travel. Just do something with yourself.

 

[jodelli]

Same thing happened with me. Started university, by the winter semester I could barely make myself walk through the classroom door. I would go there, anxiety would kick in, and I'd have to leave. Spent time exploring corridors and lot's of time in the library.

DX'd bipolar years later. Never did get a degree, although I tried out some distance courses from the University of Waterloo.

I could ace it now, but couldn't pay for it, including the time off for study.

 

[toolbox]

I have a few things for you.

1. Nobody can make you goto college

Thats right no body can make you do anything you don't want to do. The ONLY things you have to do in life is pay taxes and die thats it!

2. There are plenty of good jobs to be had without a degree. You dont need a 'stupid piece of paper' to be successful.

So True

 

[0098386]

It's all nerve racking at first but you'll love it. Best years of my life have been at college.
I was terrible on the first day. I only knew 1 person there but tried to make an effort to meet people. Met my now girlfriend there too, she looked as nervous as me
Nutshell - College is great.

 

[Rodimus Prime]

I have a few things for you.

1. Nobody can make you goto college. I was pressured into going, and going somewhere I didn't really want to go and I regret it. Sure, things worked out pretty well, but I still wish I had done what I really wanted to do.

2. There are plenty of good jobs to be had without a degree. You dont need a 'stupid piece of paper' to be successful. Most people who goto college would probably be just as successful if they didn't go. People claim college = success because most successful people choose to go. I would have been just as successful if I didnt go, and most people I know would have as well.

While I agree with you on point 1.

Point 2 I disagree with you on. there yes are SOME jobs that are good with out a degree they are few and far between and shrinking every day. College degree general makes people more successful because it opens a lot more doors. With out there doors being open one could.d never even set foot in the door for a lot of jobs.
Remember a college degree is becoming the new base line for jobs. There is no arguing with the statics. With a degree on average you make a lot more money

http://www.earnmydegree.com/online-education/learning-center/education-value.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Educational_attainment_in_the_United_States

 

[Clyde099]

College is definitely not for everyone.
Try to finish one semester or quarter and see how you feel...

 

[MatLane]

I really do understand my friend i really do


My school life was a bit strange. Because i was quiet i actually was treated like an outkast. I was shy and very unconfident. Was not very in social meetings or circumstances and still not 100% myself.


Please try not to worry. Hard to say that but i was worried when i started college, what it was going to be and would i get on with the people.

I actually did and my confidence started to build.

Just take deep breaths relax and be yourself. Try to get involved with discussions and share your thoughts, it helps. I was afraid to. I did it in the end and eventually i got better at talking with a big group.


Hope this helps buddy and all the best!


;-)

 

[ghall]

Hello everyone. I missed my class, my first class and the only class I had today. I'm kind of pissed at myself for not at least trying. I contacted my advisor to see if she can help work this out because I can't be waking up every morning, freaking out and not going to class. I'm not sure what else to do, I'm pretty upset right now.

 

[wordmunger]

I can't really add much to what others have said but I can add one thing: "College-level" courses in high school are much different from real college courses. For one thing, the high school courses often try to intimidate students to make them think "this is serious." That's true of some college courses but not all of them. If you're excited about your major (it sounds like you are) you'll probably do fine.

[edit]: Just saw your latest post. Missing one class isn't going to kill you either. But you will need to show up for most of them!

 

[JLatte]

Hello everyone. I missed my class, my first class and the only class I had today. I'm kind of pissed at myself for not at least trying. I contacted my advisor to see if she can help work this out because I can't be waking up every morning, freaking out and not going to class. I'm not sure what else to do, I'm pretty upset right now.

Why should your adviser work this out for you because you can't make it to the only class you had today? It's not your adviser's fault, and stop with the anxiety issues. You're clearly able to address them which means you're completely aware of the problem and the situation. I know what the hell anxiety is, but what you're doing is still making excuses. It's no wonder you post here, everyone seems to baby you and tell you it's alright. You have a lot of issues you need to work out, and in the end, you have to take control of yourself. Only you can change yourself. If you actually wanted to do something productive, I'm sure you could.

 

[rhsgolfer33]

[edit]: Just saw your latest post. Missing one class isn't going to kill you either. But you will need to show up for most of them!

Unfortunately he will pretty much have to show up to the second class or the instructor will likely drop him so people who want to add the class can add.

I don't know how big your school is Ghall, but you will likely have opportunity to get to know the professor. If you are more comfortable knowing your teachers, go to their office hours, tell them your situation and find some common ground with them about what you're learning. The easiest way to get A's in college is to get to know your professors and it might make your anxiety situation a little easier.

First you need to make it to class though. Hundreds of people make the same trip to school you do, more than likely it isn't going to be any different for you than it is for them. In famous Nike talk, just do it.

 

[ChrisA]

Well I guess. I feel less crazy about my opinions.

My problem isn't fitting in. I could care less about that. My problem is all the extra baggage that comes with my anxiety disorder.

What you need is profesional help from someone who has the letters "MD" after their name. Seriouisly. If a disorder is so bad tht yu can't do normal things hat everyone else can it requires treatment. It is likey that the people in the school's councilling office can help you find a psychologist who you can work with.

The criteeria for deciding if you should seek help should be if the problem prevnts you from doing things that most others can do.

As for putting it off. I'd say no. Not for another day. OK so you don't go what then? nothing will change.

 

[Apple!Fre@k]

I think that issue is probably best left between Ghall and his doctors. We have no idea how to judge the positives vs. negatives of any medication he may be on or that his doctors may wish to put him on.

You think the doctors really know how the drugs will effect someone? Hardly. All they can do is make an educated guess. By no means do they know what will really happen. They prescribe drugs on a trial and error basis. If a drug they prescribe for your insomnia doesn't work and it makes your penis go numb, come back in and they'll give you another one to try.

Word of caution: I sincerely hope whatever the OP is taking is not an anti-depressant. Anti-depressants are just about the most dangerous drug produced. Look into the history of every single school shooting in the past decade and in EVERY single case you discover that the perpetrator was on anti-depressant drugs. Why do you think the FDA demanded pharmaceutical companies now add suicide warnings to their products? For that exact reason.

Here's the common process of addiction that the pharmaceutical companies brainwash so many into:

Kindergarden - Grammar School:
Kid is hyper so they put him on Ritalin

Middle School:
Kid is depressed so they put him on anti-depressants

High School - Adult:
Kid is suicidal so they put him on anti-suicide drugs

This is no coincidence. It's strategically planned by the pharmaceutical companies so they have customers paying them for life.

 

[Apple!Fre@k]

Hello everyone. I missed my class, my first class and the only class I had today. I'm kind of pissed at myself for not at least trying. I contacted my advisor to see if she can help work this out because I can't be waking up every morning, freaking out and not going to class. I'm not sure what else to do, I'm pretty upset right now.

The only reason you freak out is because you're afraid you're going to fail. Don't worry about it, man. College is not that big of a deal. And either do it or don't. You either need to give it your all or don't go at all. Don't do it half-assed. It'd be better to skip college altogether. And trust me, if you're determined, you will not end up as some idiot flipping burgers at McDonald's if you don't go to college. I don't care how many people tell you that you will if you don't get a college degree. They are wrong!

Just trust your intuition and if college is for you, great. If it's not, that's fine, too. College is not the end all and getting a college degree does not, in any way, ensure success.

 

[TheAnswer]

You think the doctors really know how the drugs will effect someone? Hardly. All they can do is make an educated guess.

I was just saying that a professional's educated guess after having related to ghall in person was probably a better guess than any of us who have only interfaced with him in the context of this forum.