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The angry man and the iPad - a chilling tale.

Z

Ztormie

macrumors regular
Original poster
I thought of a classic case of Apple related eavesdropping from Sweden I read in a blog a while ago and thought I'd translate it to english so you could also enjoy it.
Source: http://fredrik.cafe.se/en-man-som-heter-ove-koper-en-data-som-inte-ar-en-data/


I’m in my local computer-store to buy a cord. In front of me in the line stands a middle aged man.

The man: (Waves a midsize package in front of the sales clerk) So! Is this one of them Ajjpadds (Ipad)??
Clerk: (Visibly uncomfortable) Yes, excactly. But it would be great if you didn’t wave it around like that..
Man: (Looks skeptically at the package) Well! And that is a data machine, right??

(Here he actually means ”dator” which is the swedish translation of ”computer”, but the older, technology allergic generation still often use the laymans term ”data” which roughly translates to ”data-machine”)

Clerk: (Nods doubtfully) Yes…. Or rather.. It’s an iPad. Some call it a ”tablet” and others call it a ”surftablet”. There are different ways to view it.
Man: (Looks at the clerk as if he just spoke backwards) Uhuh!
Clerk: (Nods doubtfully) Yeees..
Man: (Shakes the package some more) So, is this thing any good then??
Clerk: Yes. Or.. How do you mean?
Man: (Sighs loudly, talks extremely slowly, like the clerk can’t understand swedish) Is. It. Any. Good?? Is it a good data machine??
Clerk: Well.. yes.. it’s very good, but it really depends on what kind of computer you want.
Man: (Annoyed) I want a data machine, a regular ****ing data machine!
Clerk: Well, this is really not a regular computer. Maybe you’d rather want a.. (searches for an obvious word that the customer could possibly relate to).. a laptop?
Man: No, I ****ing don’t! I want a data machine!
Clerk: A laptop is a computer.
Man: (Upset) I know that!
Clerk: Okey.
(Silence)
Man: (Looks skeptically at the box) Where do you fold out the keyboard?
Clerk: Well, it doesn’t really have a keyboard.
Man: (Looks angrily at the clerk) Well! That’s because you have to buy that separately ,right? For a lot of ****ING money!
Clerk: No.. but… This computer HAS no keyboard. You control everything on the screen.
Man: (Shakes his head slowly and tiredly, as if he’s just witnessed the sales clerk licking the outside of an ice cream counter) But I bloody hell need a keyboard. You ****ing get that, right?
Clerk: (Sighs deeply, obviously counts to ten in his head) Okey. I see. But then I don’t think you should buy this computer. I think that you, for example, should buy a Macbook instead.
Man: (Not convinced at all) A Macbook?
Clerk: Yes.
Man: Is that one of them e-readers everyone keeps talking about?
Clerk: (Bottomless sigh) No. A Macbook is a.. it’s a.. laptop. With a keyboard.
Man: Uhuh!
Clerk: Yes.
Man: (Shakes the package some more, then sourly looks around the store) Are they any good then??
Clerk: (Clearly resists the impusle to scratch his eyes out) Let me see if my colleague is finished with his customer, then he can come over and show you.
Man: Uhuh!
Clerk (Dissapears behind counter. Returns with a colleague.)
Colleague: (Happily) Hi! How may I help you?
Man: I want a data machine!
Colleague: (Looks at the man, drops his happy face somewhat, looks at the other sales clerk with an obvious You’re-gonna-pay-for-this-look) Ooookey. A ”data machine” was it? Then, for a start, we could go over here to our section of portables.
Man: (Sourly) Yes! I bloody hell know what a ”lapptopp” is. You don’t need to say ”portable”!
Colleague: (Walks to the other end of the store while muttering) Great. This’ll be fun..
Clerk: (Sighs, looks at me) I can help the next customer then.
Me: That’s me!
Clerk: And how may I help you?
Me: I’d like to buy a cord.
Clerk: What kind of cord?
Me: A white one, please!
Clerk: (Looks doggedly at me for a long time. Looks at his watch. It’s twenty past ten a.m. Looks at the clerk in the next cashier) Could you assist this customer Sara? I’m ****ing going to lunch now.
 
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It's not only chilling, but also a testament to all the oh-so-patient sales clerks out there who have to deal with these kind of situations on a regular basis 😀
 
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This sounds made up. And if not the clerks are idiots...

And on top of that I know more than a few technically savvy seniors...
Ones that can and do run rings around snotty nosed arrogant computer store clerks.
 
Papanate said:
This sounds made up. And if not the clerks are idiots...

And on top of that I know more than a few technically savvy seniors...
Ones that can and do run rings around snotty nosed arrogant computer store clerks.
Click to expand...

Yup. It is possible for this scenario to play out, however, these type of stories are all too common in the Internet, the witty narrative, the count to ten part and the involving a colleague are all part of the same type of model story. Still entertaining to read for some, but yeah, either the same guy writing these has experienced a lot of similar moments, or people with too much time on their hands make up or exaggerate stories.
 
This eavesdrop was made a while ago when the iPad was new. I agree that it does sound somewhat made up in english, but I can assure you that it is perfectly possible. Some of the expressions and mannerisms the man uses are typical for the swedish language and are hard to translate to exact equivalent expressions in english, but I did my best and thought the story worked quite well translated. I am sorry that you found it so disappointing.
 
Mr_Brightside_@ said:
These sound like awful salespeople.
Click to expand...

How so? If the customer is just clueless and needs help distinguishing between a tablet and a regular computer, that's one thing, but if he or she is rude, curses and speaks condescendingly to the clerk I don't think they should have to just stand there and take it.
 
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Papanate said:
This sounds made up. And if not the clerks are idiots...
Click to expand...

The customers are idiots! I hear the same sorts of arguments in camera stores and home-appliance stores. Of course, I handle computer customers differently, because I speak business to business people and geek to hackers. Some people just don't want to hear about your iLife and 60,000 applications. No, they want to hear about the TCO numbers and how fast this iPad can be installed in a business operation to do some task. People who don't have a business intent and don't seem to understand technology, while also being stupidly argumentative... well, it's Next Please!
 
Reminds me of a story my wife told me about 20 years ago.

She was working in a jewelry store, a customer came in looking for a watch.

She showed her watch to my wife and said I would like to buy a watch like this. My wife said OK, and asked her if she had any problems with the watch she had. The customer said no, I just moved here from the east coast and need a watch for this time zone! My wife asked her if she would like her watch set for this time zone, and saved the lady a bunch of money.

There are many other stories such as this one.
 
Ztormie said:
How so? If the customer is just clueless and needs help distinguishing between a tablet and a regular computer, that's one thing, but if he or she is rude, curses and speaks condescendingly to the clerk I don't think they should have to just stand there and take it.
Click to expand...

If the tale was true, which I question, the foul-mouthed angry jerk should have been escorted out of the store. Was he drunk?
 
IDK, I'm sure half the stories like this are made up, but if you dont think at least half are true you've never worked in retail. And I only worked in a bookstore (RIP Borders), I can't imagine what you get when you throw technology into the mix!
 
My brother in law manages a bank and he had a lady come in one day and hand him a withdrawal slip for about $100. He went to process it, and found that she was about $500 overdrawn on her account. When he told her that he couldn't process this because her checking account was overdrawn, she said, "That's impossible! I still have checks left in my checkbook!"

So yes, there are people that stupid out there.
 
yeah, if this is actually true, the minute the first %^&%ing came out of his mouth, he would have been chatting with the manager, not me.
 
Yeah the guy was really rude, but the sales guy didn't do a great job by the sound of it. Using language and terminology that your customer doesn't understand is a pretty basic error. If someone holding a ipad asked me if it was a computer, I wouldn't say "Yes…. Or rather.. It’s an iPad. Some call it a ”tablet” and others call it a ”surftablet”. There are different ways to view it." What good is that?! The guy clearly didn't know what an ipad or a tablet was so you immediately get his back up and make him feel dumb.
 
spiderman0616 said:
My brother in law manages a bank and he had a lady come in one day and hand him a withdrawal slip for about $100. He went to process it, and found that she was about $500 overdrawn on her account. When he told her that he couldn't process this because her checking account was overdrawn, she said, "That's impossible! I still have checks left in my checkbook!"

So yes, there are people that stupid out there.
Click to expand...

I've heard that several times, as a joke. I don't believe it's true.
 
spiderman0616 said:
My brother in law manages a bank and he had a lady come in one day and hand him a withdrawal slip for about $100. He went to process it, and found that she was about $500 overdrawn on her account. When he told her that he couldn't process this because her checking account was overdrawn, she said, "That's impossible! I still have checks left in my checkbook!"

So yes, there are people that stupid out there.
Click to expand...

hayesk said:
I've heard that several times, as a joke. I don't believe it's true.
Click to expand...

According to this it first appeared in a cartoon strip in 1971!!
 
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