Dear Phil Schiller,
Another year, another iPhone launch supply shortage, huh?
Well, Phil... the sh*t’s getting tired, bro. Those of us that have been following this stuff for quite some time can see through the artificial shortage crapola. Every year, the leading tech company on Earth (that has more money than God) seems to not have the intelligence nor the global resources needed to pull off a successful launch that sees that every person that wants a new iPhone of their choice, gets a new iPhone of their choice. I mean, after all, they are willing to pay the (rather high) price to be on board with planet Earth’s latest and greatest premium pocket computer from the one company they trust to deliver the wonderful experience they have come to expect. You really shouldn’t let them down. Yet, year after year, I see and hear people that are disappointed and yes, let down, by the lack of supply at launch. You mean to tell me... that APPLE, of all companies, doesn’t have the time or ability to supply adequate amounts of the iPhone variations to customers at launch? I don’t believe it for one minute.
As they say in jolly ol’ England, “I call bullocks!”
Your marketing tactics are tired and your paid marketing outlets (Macrumors, Bloomberg, Ming Chi Kuo) have become more obvious to people like me than a turd floating at the top of a holiday punch bowl. Spare us the drama of drumming up the fanboys on your pro-Apple media sites to help build word-of-mouth hype and an “air of exclusivity” that comes from actually obtaining a device at launch. People want their product... in hand... on launch day. You lose many potential sales from people that are excited and ready to spend, sometimes spontaneously, to be among the first to have "the new shiny" in-hand on day one.
Your company has enough money and people working for it that you could stack iPhones to the effing moon and back within a few months’ time. Cut the BS, quit playing supply and demand games and start supplying an adequate amount of product at launch. You’ll piss less people off, gain a little more market share and, as a side effect, build a reputation as THE company that delivers. I heard a very wise man once say, “Real artists ship!” I personally believe you’d be wise to pay attention to that man’s words now, in 2017, and beyond.
Want to ensure the iPhone sells record-breaking amounts well into the future, Phil? I can help with that. All without playing supply/demand games, too. I have ideas, man - good ideas. No... make that... extraordinary, phenomenal ideas that would surely prove to be magical, if you were to give them a chance. My personal phone number is listed along with the rest of my iCloud and Apple ID credentials somewhere on your North Carolina data center servers. I give you my explicit permission to use any of that information you find necessary to contact me regarding a mutually beneficial job offer. (LOL)
