It has nothing to do with the magsafe connection itself. The material that is used on the cable going from the transformer (power Brick) to the magsafe is made from a soft and supple material that feels nice and coils up easily but unfortunately it appears to have the durability of wet tissue.

You can see that apple has already added extra material to the magsafe connector as a strain relief but I suspect that it is not sufficient. I am sitting on the couch using a brand new aluminum mb and looking at the power cord it is under no tension but is sagging and I can see where this could over time kink and break the insulation. When I use my Dell in the same manner the cord sticks straight out by about two inches because it is reinforced much further down the cord. It is uglier and does not look as nice but I suspect it will last longer under normal use. This is not a dig against Apple I am just looking at it from a engineering standpoint. I do not think it is a dangerous design but is far less durable then it could be. I think apple is trying to keep a certain look and will not compromise on that. In the future when my warranty is up I will probably put a shrink tube (no not the thing that happens when a guy goes swimming in cold water) on the end to help add some strain relief.
I am speaking in general about the failures of magsafes not the particular toasty one in the original post. That could very well be a break in the insulation and a defect with the mbp drawing to much power.