I have a particular variant of this problem on Sierra with my DELL P2415Q: When I first boot the machine plugged into the Dell monitor, I get the higher resolutions fine. My display settings looks like this:
It's when I unplug/replug the external monitor that I lose the high resolution and my display settings looks like this:
I tried setting:
sudo defaults write /Library/Preferences/com.apple.windowserver.plist DisplayResolutionEnabled -bool true
and rebooting, but that did not solve the problem.
Did not have this issue in El Capitan.
Talked with Apple Tech Support -- they did not have a solution for me. Hopefully Apple will release a fix.