When will I be happy?

[Huntn]

Both.

Material things equate to comfort, but not usually overall happiness. Are you expecting to achieve happiness by owning all of the things you desire? Ask the people where money is no object how happy many of them are.... not.

 

[Scepticalscribe]

Material things equate to comfort, but not usually overall happiness. Are you expecting to achieve happiness by owning all of the things you desire? Ask the people where money is no object how happy many of them are.... not.

Agreed.

And, I would add to that an observation to the effect that if you define your life by the things you own, and the things you can buy, you may run the risk of thinking that everything is - or can be - measured by such a yardstick, and that everything can be bought, and is for sale.

When you have become comfortable in your own skin, you can begin to define yourself by who you are, rather than what you own.

 

[A.Goldberg]

Agreed.

And, I would add to that an observation to the effect that if you define your life by the things you own, and the things you can buy, you may run the risk of thinking that everything is - or can be - measured by such a yardstick, and that everything can be bought, and is for sale.

When you have become comfortable in your own skin, you can begin to define yourself by who you are, rather than what you own.

Agreed, very good point. Oftentimes we use the wrong metrics to determine our self value- our job, how much money we make, what we own, etc. While all of these things are important to some level, you may find that these are not the measurements that our psyches actually care about. Rather than a job title, we care about have having a sense of purpose. We care about feeling loved and depended on by others. We feel of value if we have others to care for. That's why giving/generosity/volunteering makes people happy. Humans are social beings, no amount of Apple product and cars can satisfy the emotional connection we yearn for. Building and maintaining meaningful relationships is important. If you're too preoccupied with yourself, relationships will be difficult and their will be yet another void in your life.

Money is important, but it's not the basis of satisfaction in life. Our culture has hardwired us to think like this, but if you look at what truly makes people happy, material worth has very little impact. Are you going to be happy if you're poor in a rich society, probably not 100% happy, especially if you can't afford basic needs. But after that, there is always something more you will want. Even with all the money in the world, I suspect most people would eventually find that no amount of products could fill their lives with happiness.

 

[S.B.G]

When will I be able with all the products I have?

What are your expectations for gaining happiness in your life?

 

[2298754]

If you want to be happy, start doing more for other people. Ironic as it sounds, the greatest boost to personal happiness comes from putting yourself aside and putting others first. Active kindness has a remarkable way of making your feel better.


I'd settle for that last 918 that rolled off the line last week.

Hey! I called dibs on that already

 

[ThinkDifferent24]

If you want to be happy, it can't be sometime later because then you just move the goalposts further when you get there. Happiness is all about gratitude NOW IMO. We have so much to be thankful for.

 

[Arran]

...start doing more for other people...

Excellent advice. It makes all sorts of good things happen in the outside world but, from a purely selfish perspective, it makes you feel powerful. Not megalomaniac, world-dictator powerful. Just simple, everyday, empowered.

And if that doesn't make you positively giddy then you've got other issues.

 

[Arran]

When?

In the middle of reading about the Greek debt crisis, I stumbled across this helpful article on the BBC and thought of you: Putting the Greek back into Stoicism

It's written by: William Irvine, professor of philosophy at Wright State University in Ohio.

Two quotes seemed particularly relevant:

1. On appreciating the all the "toys" you already have:

The Stoics have a simple technique for making our days go better: we should think about how they could have been worse. Notice that I didn't say dwell on how they could have been worse; that would be a recipe for a miserable existence. Instead, we should allow ourselves to entertain flickering thoughts about the loss of our friends, money, lover, job, health - all the things we value.

If we do lose any of these things, we will have been prepared by our negative thinking, and this will likely lessen the blow of our loss; we will, in a sense, have seen it coming. And if we don't lose these things, we will find ourselves far more appreciative of them than would otherwise have been the case.

A life filled with people and things that we appreciate is easy to enjoy. The Stoics were smart enough to realise that we have it in our power to appreciate the life we find ourselves living if we can just bear in mind that things are a lot better than they could have been.

2. On resisting your desire for yet more "toys" (and in so resisting, regain control of yourself):

The Stoics valued self-control, as did most ancient philosophers. If we have self-control, we control ourselves; lack it, and it is someone or something else that controls us. Do we really want to spend the one life we have controlled by someone or something else?

The current Greek crisis can be attributed to a lack of self-control: the Greek government borrowed more money than it could comfortably pay back. Borrowing money, unfortunately, is like using drugs: it feels good at first and feels bad later on. This makes it easy for borrowers to focus their attention on the pleasant present and put off thoughts about a future in which the only choices open to them are painful.

The Stoics thought people could develop self-control by engaging in acts of self-denial. They didn't advocate anything extreme: it was their philosophical rivals the Cynics who suggested doing such things as hugging statues on cold winter days. The Stoics instead advocate that we periodically go out of our way to make ourselves somewhat uncomfortable. Fail to do this, and we will lose our tolerance for discomfort, meaning that the slightest inconvenience will have the power to ruin our day. Those inured to discomfort, the Stoics realised, are almost always happier than those who lead a pampered existence.