Would You Date Your Co-Worker?

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by HappyDude20, Mar 24, 2010.

  1. HappyDude20 macrumors 68020

    HappyDude20

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2008
    Location:
    Los Angeles, Ca
    #1
    I just hired at a new place, kinda a small place (reason why i'm hesistant) with no more than 8 employees. Small office but have noticed heavy flirting with one co-worker. Downside here, at least through my eyes is that she is higher up than I am as a lead there.

    I've never dated a co-worker before but know of friends that have and personally what i've seen is that the moment you date a co-worker the countdown clock starts ticking till something happens such as one of you leaving, quitting, fired, etc.

    My buddy dated his lead last year as they both worked at Starbucks for about 6 months, this same buddy even had sex with another co-worker there but eventually he got fired for making sexual advances to these girls he already had relations with.

    Perhaps the question is ultimately answered with my response as to If I would be willing to risk my job...
    ...But I really like my job! Its so chill and the pay is good...

    But am here wondering if you would or wouldn't do it and why/why not?

    Thanks guys!
     
  2. MacDawg macrumors P6

    MacDawg

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    "Between the Hedges"
  3. iShater macrumors 604

    iShater

    Joined:
    Aug 13, 2002
    Location:
    Chicagoland
    #3
    Bad idea + 1.

    I think you already gave enough examples reasons not to.
     
  4. ethical macrumors 68000

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2007
    #4
    Depends if you want to be like your buddy and just screw around with the girls, or if you actually want a relationship with her.
     
  5. mscriv macrumors 601

    mscriv

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2008
    Location:
    Dallas, Texas
    #5
    Lots of companies have HR policies that prevent office relationships. Generally, it's just not a good idea. Of course there are stories where it has worked out and stories of where employers have made provision or adjustment to accomomdate employee's who want to date, but in my experience there are more failed stories than successful ones.

    You said it best yourself, it's a risk that could cost you your job. That being said, life involves risk and the decision is yours to make.
     
  6. rdowns macrumors Penryn

    rdowns

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2003
    #6
    Speaking from experience, don't **** where you eat.
     
  7. GoCubsGo macrumors Nehalem

    GoCubsGo

    Joined:
    Feb 19, 2005
    #7
    Do it, come here and start a new thread about a crazy bitch at work who is stalking your ass and you want Mac girl advice.
     
  8. Disc Golfer macrumors 6502a

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2009
    #8
    Potential mating partners are everyplace. Chill jobs with decent pay are Not.
     
  9. rpang macrumors member

    Joined:
    Apr 20, 2009
    Location:
    So Cal...
    #9

    Agreed... Was about to post the same thing.
     
  10. roadbloc macrumors G3

    roadbloc

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2009
    Location:
    UK
    #10
    If she is hot, get in there :)

    Never think of consequences.
     
  11. theITGuy macrumors 6502a

    theITGuy

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2009
    Location:
    chasing the ghost in the machine
    #11
    This ^^^. I've done it twice...once it lasted almost 2 years, the second time she became my wife :D

    -J.-
     
  12. rdowns macrumors Penryn

    rdowns

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2003
    #12
    Please disregard my previous advice and follow jessica.'s immediately. kthzbai.
     
  13. SilentPanda Moderator emeritus

    SilentPanda

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2002
    Location:
    The Bamboo Forest
    #13
    I think if it's a big enough company and there is enough separation between your job roles and how much you interact with each other at work it's not all that bad. I wouldn't want to date/marry somebody I worked very closely with as the thought of seeing the same person 8 hours a day at work and 8 hours a day at home... well... I need my personal time... but with a small place like you're at I would probably avoid it.
     
  14. Gav2k macrumors G3

    Gav2k

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2009
    #14
    Tbh op we need a picture (full body) because there is a time when a definatly not has to become a hell yes!
     
  15. dXTC macrumors 68020

    dXTC

    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2006
    Location:
    Up, up in my studio, studio
    #15
    Workplace romance with an "equal" co-worker is an iffy prospect at the very least, not to mention somewhat unprofessional. With someone you consider a supervisor or leader, it's a disaster waiting to happen.

    Keep your conversations with this person friendly but cordial.

    ROFL! And a +1 to this, as well.
     
  16. maflynn Moderator

    maflynn

    Staff Member

    Joined:
    May 3, 2009
    Location:
    Boston
    #16
    I think its a bad idea. If I went out on a date and my wife caught wind of it, I'd be a dead man :eek:
     
  17. Signal-11 macrumors 65816

    Signal-11

    Joined:
    Mar 23, 2008
    Location:
    2nd Star to the Right
    #17
    I'm going against the grain. I've had workplace romances work out fine and split amicably. You've just got to be more upfront and honest than usual.
     
  18. Teh Don Ditty macrumors G4

    Teh Don Ditty

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2007
    Location:
    Maryland
    #18
    I had a f*** buddy aka friends with benefits while at one of my jobs.

    Never was a problem.

    It ultimate depends on how mature the 2 people are about it.
     
  19. Jaffa Cake macrumors Core

    Jaffa Cake

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2004
    Location:
    The City of Culture, Englandshire
    #19
    In a word, no. For one thing my missus would kill me.
     
  20. leekohler macrumors G5

    leekohler

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2004
    Location:
    Chicago, Illinois
    #20
    Worst advice I've ever heard.

    OP- do NOT go there.
     
  21. Sun Baked macrumors G5

    Sun Baked

    Joined:
    May 19, 2002
    #21
    It is the breakup that is the problem .... if it gets vindictive it can get ugly for everyone and drag the business into the middle of it -- quite a few extortion attempts happen if one of the parties is married or operating shady operations at work.
     
  22. dukebound85 macrumors P6

    dukebound85

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2005
    Location:
    5045 feet above sea level
    #22
    That is wierd. My last job, a government lab was FILLED with office relationships. It WAS the dating pool for the employees there it seemed. Very strange as every place I had worked previously does not encourage office relationships but that place was so full of them it was crazy
     
  23. Jaffa Cake macrumors Core

    Jaffa Cake

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2004
    Location:
    The City of Culture, Englandshire
    #23
    We went and met up with a couple of old friends of mine (and their partners) last weekend. Both of them met their gentlemen friends at work, one literally sits across a desk from her husband.

    Just saying, like.
     
  24. Elixer macrumors regular

    Joined:
    Aug 15, 2006
    #24
    That's a tough one. On one hand things could work out fine, even if you do break up at some point. On the other it could be a complete nightmare.

    The only logical solution is to flip a coin. :)
     
  25. RawBert macrumors 68000

    RawBert

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2010
    Location:
    North Hollywood, CA
    #25
    I've done this quite a few times. It's fun for a while, but then it sucks.

    Eventually you'll stop seeing her, but you still have to see her.
    Not cool.

    So, if you don't mind being miserable at work, go for it.
     

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