Would You Date Your Co-Worker?

HappyDude20

macrumors 68030
Original poster
Jul 13, 2008
2,686
194
Los Angeles, Ca
I just hired at a new place, kinda a small place (reason why i'm hesistant) with no more than 8 employees. Small office but have noticed heavy flirting with one co-worker. Downside here, at least through my eyes is that she is higher up than I am as a lead there.

I've never dated a co-worker before but know of friends that have and personally what i've seen is that the moment you date a co-worker the countdown clock starts ticking till something happens such as one of you leaving, quitting, fired, etc.

My buddy dated his lead last year as they both worked at Starbucks for about 6 months, this same buddy even had sex with another co-worker there but eventually he got fired for making sexual advances to these girls he already had relations with.

Perhaps the question is ultimately answered with my response as to If I would be willing to risk my job...
...But I really like my job! Its so chill and the pay is good...

But am here wondering if you would or wouldn't do it and why/why not?

Thanks guys!
 

ethical

macrumors 68000
Dec 22, 2007
1,661
1
Depends if you want to be like your buddy and just screw around with the girls, or if you actually want a relationship with her.
 

mscriv

macrumors 601
Aug 14, 2008
4,911
586
Dallas, Texas
Lots of companies have HR policies that prevent office relationships. Generally, it's just not a good idea. Of course there are stories where it has worked out and stories of where employers have made provision or adjustment to accomomdate employee's who want to date, but in my experience there are more failed stories than successful ones.

You said it best yourself, it's a risk that could cost you your job. That being said, life involves risk and the decision is yours to make.
 

GoCubsGo

macrumors Nehalem
Feb 19, 2005
35,743
141
Do it, come here and start a new thread about a crazy bitch at work who is stalking your ass and you want Mac girl advice.
 

rdowns

macrumors Penryn
Jul 11, 2003
27,345
12,409
Please disregard my previous advice and follow jessica.'s immediately. kthzbai.
 

SilentPanda

Moderator emeritus
Oct 8, 2002
9,808
28
The Bamboo Forest
I think if it's a big enough company and there is enough separation between your job roles and how much you interact with each other at work it's not all that bad. I wouldn't want to date/marry somebody I worked very closely with as the thought of seeing the same person 8 hours a day at work and 8 hours a day at home... well... I need my personal time... but with a small place like you're at I would probably avoid it.
 

Gav2k

macrumors G3
Jul 24, 2009
9,218
1,584
Tbh op we need a picture (full body) because there is a time when a definatly not has to become a hell yes!
 

dXTC

macrumors 68020
Oct 30, 2006
2,032
49
Up, up in my studio, studio
Workplace romance with an "equal" co-worker is an iffy prospect at the very least, not to mention somewhat unprofessional. With someone you consider a supervisor or leader, it's a disaster waiting to happen.

Keep your conversations with this person friendly but cordial.

Do it, come here and start a new thread about a crazy bitch at work who is stalking your ass and you want Mac girl advice.
ROFL! And a +1 to this, as well.
 

maflynn

Moderator
Staff member
May 3, 2009
63,860
30,382
Boston
I think its a bad idea. If I went out on a date and my wife caught wind of it, I'd be a dead man :eek:
 

Teh Don Ditty

macrumors G4
Jan 15, 2007
11,308
5
Maryland
I had a f*** buddy aka friends with benefits while at one of my jobs.

Never was a problem.

It ultimate depends on how mature the 2 people are about it.
 

Sun Baked

macrumors G5
May 19, 2002
14,874
57
It is the breakup that is the problem .... if it gets vindictive it can get ugly for everyone and drag the business into the middle of it -- quite a few extortion attempts happen if one of the parties is married or operating shady operations at work.
 

dukebound85

macrumors P6
Jul 17, 2005
18,059
1,185
5045 feet above sea level
Lots of companies have HR policies that prevent office relationships. Generally, it's just not a good idea. Of course there are stories where it has worked out and stories of where employers have made provision or adjustment to accomomdate employee's who want to date, but in my experience there are more failed stories than successful ones.

You said it best yourself, it's a risk that could cost you your job. That being said, life involves risk and the decision is yours to make.
That is wierd. My last job, a government lab was FILLED with office relationships. It WAS the dating pool for the employees there it seemed. Very strange as every place I had worked previously does not encourage office relationships but that place was so full of them it was crazy
 

Elixer

macrumors regular
Aug 15, 2006
238
0
That's a tough one. On one hand things could work out fine, even if you do break up at some point. On the other it could be a complete nightmare.

The only logical solution is to flip a coin. :)
 

RawBert

macrumors 68000
Jan 19, 2010
1,727
62
North Hollywood, CA
I've done this quite a few times. It's fun for a while, but then it sucks.

Eventually you'll stop seeing her, but you still have to see her.
Not cool.

So, if you don't mind being miserable at work, go for it.