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A guy killed himself in my back yard tonight...

Seeing a dead body will stick in your mind for as long as you live. It will always be with me. You just have to stick it way deep in your mind to the point your forget it even existed and happened.

jon
 
highres said:
How come there is not even a small byline somewhere in your local paper or some mention of it online? As someone who was a firefighter/paramedic for years before going into graphic design and marketing there is always at least a small entry in the obits or the crimelogs that most newspapers run. A link or blurb would help verify this story.
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Were you a paramedic in a small town? Where I live the ambulance service does almost 500,000 calls per year.... trust me, very few make it into the newspapers.


Also the part where the policeman "almost laughingly" tells him he is dead, really rings false, I have worked closely with law enforcement at accident scenes many, many times and have never, ever seen them act so unprofessionally or take such a casual attitude about a suicide or someone elses death at an accident scene.
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I have seen many new fire dudes, police officers, medics, etc who upon seeing a scene like the one the original poster described chuckled nervously... as they were almost as tense as the original poster says he was.

And, I agree, what happens at the scene, and what is joked about back at the station, are entirely different.

I am doomed to forever be a skeptic and a cynic.
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Yup... me too. Must be the nature of the work.

Cheers,

James
 
highres said:
Not trying to be tasteless and unsympathetic, so please excuse my callousness:

--How come there is not even a small byline somewhere in your local paper or some mention of it online? As someone who was a firefighter/paramedic for years before going into graphic design and marketing there is always at least a small entry in the obits or the crimelogs that most newspapers run. A link or blurb would help verify this story.
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Most credible media outlets do not report suicides or the like unless they have an major impact (eg someone threatening to jump off an interstate overpass) or they don't realize it was probably a suicide (eg someone getting run over by a train or an accident where the driver a car runs head on into a tractor trailer)
 
James L said:
Were you a paramedic in a small town? Where I live the ambulance service does almost 500,000 calls per year.... trust me, very few make it into the newspapers.
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I was a medic first in Santa Cruz County where my substation alone got around 800 calls a year (a fairly small county in terms of population and density), then in Los Angeles County in the South Robertson area which was pretty insane with thousands of calls a year county-wide. I agree that in a city where there are thousands of calls a year the chances of it getting media attention are much less.

However, I would think that a dramatic suicide like this one where someone hung themself in someone else's backyard would more than likely get at least a bi-line in the local paper or newshour, I have seen much less newsworthy items printed or aired in big city newspapers or local evening news many, many, times.

I have seen many new fire dudes, police officers, medics, etc who upon seeing a scene like the one the original poster described chuckled nervously... as they were almost as tense as the original poster says he was.
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Sure it is possible, but it is subjective, in my experience I have not seen law enforcement officers "laughing" or "joking" at a suicide scene when talking to the victims family or nearby witnesses, that just seems to me to be unprofessional and insensitive to the victims.

And, I agree, what happens at the scene, and what is joked about back at the station, are entirely different.
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Definitely different at the station, where I have heard corpses being referred to as "blue bloaters", etc. I have heard and probably told some pretty morbid yet funny stories at the station myself. After a few years in EMS services some people do get a bit calloused and jaded when faced with death or dying.

Actually the reason that I got out of EMS and into graphic design was that I got tired of seeing one car accident after another where many times there were multiple fatalities. Now the only thing that dies is my mouse occasionally.

In order to wrap up this long post, I am not saying that Crash is lying or made this whole story up, not at all, just that some of the things posted in the story did not make sense to me and that I am always a bit skeptical and jaded and take things with a grain of salt when it comes to these types of posts on the internet. No insult intended.
 
James L said:
Actually, you are in no position to make that comment. How each person reacts to a tragic and stressful situation is personal to them.
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You're right. Where was my head when I made that boneheaded comment? :confused:

thisislacero.jpg
 
Strange. It's a real bummer you had to go trough that. I've never experienced anything close to that, the closest thing was when I was up at my high school late one night running sound for the dress rehearsal for the new theater production. Then this guy walks into the theater his eye was really messed up, turns out he had gotten battery acid in his eye. So we called 911 and all that stuff. But the weirdest thing was that all of the doors where locked, we even went and checked all the doors afterwards. Yeah it was a weird experience, but no where near your.
 
Wow that sucks. At least it was someone you didn't know though. It's much worse when it's a friend or relative.

Take care of yourselves, and don't blame yourselves for any of it.
 
sounds like a not so fun night.

Hopefully you can forget, and or realize that this isn't something that you caused. The easiest way to get over bad feelings that you may have in your back yard, would be to start using it right away, for your own needs, and make some good memories on it. Otherwise you will always thing of this event when you go into your back yard, for the rest of the time you own your home.

Take care!

840
 
highres said:
I was a medic first in Santa Cruz County where my substation alone got around 800 calls a year (a fairly small county in terms of population and density), then in Los Angeles County in the South Robertson area which was pretty insane with thousands of calls a year county-wide.
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I would love to work in a station with only 800 calls per year...one day I will have enough seniority, probably when my hair is grey!

Currently, I work in an urban station that does almost 20,000 calls per year, spread over 3 24 hour cars, and one 12 hour "peak time" car. It is not uncommon to do 10-12 calls per 12 hour shift.

Ugh.


Sure it is possible, but it is subjective, in my experience I have not seen law enforcement officers "laughing" or "joking" at a suicide scene when talking to the victims family or nearby witnesses, that just seems to me to be unprofessional and insensitive to the victims.
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I hear ya. I guess my thing with that is that we don't know what the "laugh" looked like. We have all seen the compassionate smile, the sarcastic smile, etc. I guess I am just trying to give the OP the benefit of the doubt.

Cheers,

James
 
James L said:
I hear ya. I guess my thing with that is that we don't know what the "laugh" looked like. We have all seen the compassionate smile, the sarcastic smile, etc. I guess I am just trying to give the OP the benefit of the doubt.
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And I'll give him the benefit of the doubt because he has been here for years, posted lots, isn't a new spammer type, and lots of us recognise him and his posts. I'll give almost any regular here the benefit of the doubt. Newer folks........maybe, but it depends.

And if I saw a dead body, I'd crack a nervous smile and give a short, quiet giggle. I always do, even when it seems inappropriate. It's just how I deal with situations like that. And I can understand the cop doing that too. James L is right when he says that we all react to situations in different ways, and maybe that cop reacts in the same way that I do.
 
jimN said:
Without wanting to sound a bit harsh - why didn't you check on the guy. He might not have been dead when you first saw him. If the fall is only small then it is asphyixation (which i must have spelt wrong) that kills a person, not a quick way of doing things.
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Broken neck. When they drop, sometimes the rope slips around the neck as it is supposed to and cracks the neck. Clean and simple, minimal squirming.

Well, you certainly have an interesting story. :rolleyes: I hope that you and your girlfriend can relax. I'd say remake those travel plans with your girlfriend and relax some. It'll be good for you.
 
Oh God, I'm really sorry and hope you can put this situation far fro your lives soon. Not too much to say at all, but I almost know that situation too, some years ago I saw a man handling a box and suddenly it exploited with him in very little pieces.
 
We're going back to the house this morning... during the day. We have a lot of stuff to unload still in the van. We'll be staying there tonight.

I think the cop was nervous... or he was laughing at me. I dunno. In hind sight it might have been a stupid question... it was obvious he was dead. I'm not sure... I mean he wasn't laughing, but it was a "Yeh... he's dead." in a "duh?" or "oh yeh... he's way dead." sort of way. I don't know.

To those that think I made this up, or there should be a news article somewhere... I'll keep looking. I haven't found anything yet... it's the weirdest thing I've ever seen.... it's weird how I'll go on about my daily stuff, for 10 minutes being completelly normal.. and then I'll see him kneeling in the yard... and it'll just shake me out of it and I'll say outloud "god, that's ****ed up." We're doing better though... a little nervous about today. I'll have to see my neighbor and talk about cutting the limb down... It's a big old beautiful tree though.

My mom told me I should call my home owner's insurance and let them know it happened.. but I'm not sure if this is something I should do or need to do... I'm going to try to get a hold of the cop today. She's worried about maybe a lawsuit... I can't imagine anyone trying to sue me.

I appreciate the comforting words... its still disbelief.. so surreal... I dunno.
 
Mechcozmo said:
Broken neck. When they drop, sometimes the rope slips around the neck as it is supposed to and cracks the neck. Clean and simple, minimal squirming.
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As you say the neck would only break on a long fall and from the sounds of things this wasn't like that. Without seeing a cause of death it is impossible to say.

Suicide reporting is kept to a minimum because copycat suicides are a reality and there is published research to support this. However, like brand advertising in cigarettes, it won't push healthy people to suicide just change the method of choice for the serious. Plus you'll probably get some ghouls who want to turn up at the house and see where the guy died. (I have a review of some data if anyone is actually interested!!)

As for the comments about the cop laughing, it is entirely possible that if the guy was obviously very dead that he may have found your question funny. A bit like someone asking if a man with no head is dead, again without being at the scene it is difficult to interpret this. Details tend to differentiate between real events and fictional ones but obviously a good writer includes the details. If this account was delivered first hand and spoken it might be a little easier to determine the veracity of what he is saying. I'd say that there is a very good chance that it is true and that the writer might feel that describing it all will provide some sort of release.

Finally for our would-be doctor with the curious sense of humour. Medics often laugh at things that others consider inappropriate, and we can joke around at times when the mood might seem somber. This is often referred to as the manic defense - a coping strategy for dealing with a job that can be thoroughly unpleasant at times. What you'll learn as you enter the profession is that you'll need to regulate how you behave and who you behave that way with. What some may see as a hilarious joke others will feel is grossly offensive and that can make for an awfully short career. Medicine can seem almost parasitic at times, you leap in and out of lives and are briefly involved in very extreme emotions - joy, anger, guilt, remorse and grief. How these affect you can change from person to person but i wonder if the better doctor is the one lets it all wash off at the end of the day or the one who takes everything to heart?
 
cr2sh said:
My mom told me I should call my home owner's insurance and let them know it happened.. but I'm not sure if this is something I should do or need to do... I'm going to try to get a hold of the cop today. She's worried about maybe a lawsuit... I can't imagine anyone trying to sue me.
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Call them. It'll do no harm if you don't have to but you know how insurance companies witll look for any reason to invalidate a policy so best to be safe. Plus it's america, maybe the family will sue you for leaving that dangerously unsafe piece of rope out in the back garden!!

Gotta love the litigation culture (if a woman can get 250 million from a drug company for the death of a 60 year old then anything is possible - wouldn't 5 have been enough for her to live out her days eating champagen and caviar!)
 
eva01 said:
...i just mean the fact of being able to examine a dead person is cool.
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Considering your profession of choice, perhaps, but being around someone who just died, especially if you know them, is NOT cool.

I was put in the unfortunate situation of trying to revive a neighbor of mine who had OD'd. I had a feeling he was dead, he was a black guy who now looked greyish, but I kept trying until the paramedics got there. Mouth to mouth was like blowing up a heavy meat balloon and when I removed my mouth, his lips would flap as the cool air lifelessly escaped. Giving mouth to mouth to a dead acquaintance is something I'd wish on nobody.
 
jimN said:
As you say the neck would only break on a long fall and from the sounds of things this wasn't like that. Without seeing a cause of death it is impossible to say.
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You said what I said, but in a less-lazy fashion. Yay!
 
Abstract said:
And if I saw a dead body, I'd crack a nervous smile and give a short, quiet giggle. I always do, even when it seems inappropriate. It's just how I deal with situations like that. And I can understand the cop doing that too. James L is right when he says that we all react to situations in different ways, and maybe that cop reacts in the same way that I do.
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I don't know, I think cops should be held up to higher standards. I don't know if I think it was appropiate for him to laugh.
 
jayscheuerle said:
Considering your profession of choice, perhaps, but being around someone who just died, especially if you know them, is NOT cool.

I was put in the unfortunate situation of trying to revive a neighbor of mine who had OD'd. I had a feeling he was dead, he was a black guy who now looked greyish, but I kept trying until the paramedics got there. Mouth to mouth was like blowing up a heavy meat balloon and when I removed my mouth, his lips would flap as the cool air lifelessly escaped. Giving mouth to mouth to a dead acquaintance is something I'd wish on nobody.
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My Dad went through something similar. He has a friend that is (or..was) a Chiropracter (sp?). He went in for an appointment, and they were chatting. My dad was looking at stuff on the wall when he heard a loud bang. He turned around, and the Chiropracter had a heart attack and hit his head on the sharp part of a table. He was bleeding really bad, and unconcious. He gave him mouth to mouth, and said the guys blood was spurring into my Dad's mouth.

Said it was the most horrible feeling he has ever had. He ended up saving the guys life though, kept him breathing long enough for the paramedics to come.
 
I think most cops are usually jerks. Thats just my opinion though.

The police in my town gets way way way to much money. They only 2 cops on duty at a time. Yet they have 5 NEW crown victorias, 2 "police interceptors", 3 Ford Explorers (2 unmarked), and 1 Chevy Tahoe. A "high tech" police station with all the gadgets.

This one policeman I know is a real jerk. He once tried to force my neighbors Great Dane into his car because it was wondering the neighborhood. No one minds because it is a really friendly dog and its 2 years old which is pretty old for a Great Dane. Anyways this dog hates cars, and when the stupid cop tried to get the dog into his Explorer, the dog bit his hand. The cop made a big deal about it, but nothing ever happend. I saw him the other day in a parking lot, introducing himself with this lady and he was trying to flirt with her. It was really weird.

I've seen a lot of dead people, working in a hospital. But seeing one hanging must be pretty scary.
 
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