After days of comparing the XS and XR that is where I have landed as well. The XR is awesome. I think the criticism of the screen is way overblown. The only quirk I had with the screen was that text in apps like Safari is pretty small and you have to use Zoomed mode to make the text size be close to the XS (normal IMO).I just picked up the XS and briefly considered the XR... After playing with both in store, the size was the deciding factor for me. I am not into the ginormous phones and the XS just felt night and day better in hand..
The XR is a nice phone and you can save some cash by getting it but for me, it came down to size...
I really like the XR. I LOVE the battery life of the XR. But after 6 months of knowing I wanted to go smaller than my 8+ I don’t think the XR is small ‘enough’. They are so close in screen size that the extra size and weight of the XR isn’t worth it to me.. not when the XS feels perfect in-hand. The XR has just that little bit of ‘extra’ size that requires some occasional manipulation to do what I want to do.
IMO, you cannot go wrong with either but I am going XS.