That is purely conjecture - you have no evidence to support that claim. You don't know the network traffic on the two carriers.
Verizon has been pushing EV-DO modems and laptop links for years (my Dell laptops have builtin EV-DO with Verizon). Do you know how much data traffic is on the Verizon network (hint - you don't, because it shows up as Win7/Vista/XP/OSX/Linux traffic, not as phone traffic).
Verizon even sells 3G access points - 3G to WiFI for sharing an EV-DO connection.
It's entirely possible that Verizon is already carrying far more 3G traffic than AT&T, and that adding the load from Iphones wouldn't amount to much.
We just don't know the numbers, so any claim that "Verizon would collapse if they had the Iphone" is just BS.
Indeed, I don't know the pure numbers. Yet AT&T has been pushing UTMS modems for a while. The thing is, though, the market for those UTMS modems and stuff like 3G access points is more limited; when you think about it, the iPhone really open the floodgates of consumer data mass consumption. Verizon mostly has corporate customers, AT&T has a lot of both. There's no way to say that Verizon would collapse if they had the iPhone (I wouldn't say that AT&T's collapsing, there's mostly too many whiners), but Verizon would definitely feel a strain if they were in AT&T's position. I mean, there were so many things that you'd think would have deterred the kind of mass adoption the iPhone has enjoyed. The astronomical price for the original, the more costly data plan for the 3G versions. I wouldn't have ponied up for a data plan before I had an iPhone. Hell, paying $600 for a phone was already insane enough. So I can understand how overwhelming this could be for AT&T. They likely thought they could handle the load, but they probably bit off way more than they could chew. But they can't expand as fast as they need to, either. Doesn't matter how willing they are, there's too many other hurdles.
I just find all this misdirected anger towards Apple and AT&T over the past two and a half years to be rather irritating. Price drops, subsidy stuff, network issues; all of these issues are common and prevalent in the cellphone industry. Screaming at AT&T and Apple is the dumbest way to "solve" the problem. How about complaining about the oligopoly whose flaws AT&T and Apple have been able to manifest and embody instead? A raise in text message fees gets a lot less backlash than the iPhone dropping $200 in price does. The whole 3G users upgrading to 3GS "fiasco" drew more "controversy" than Verizon raising their ETF. It's just stupid.
Cell phones aren't the only way to make calls....there are pay phones, land lines, services such as Skype, etc.
All I have is my cell phone. I'm damn lucky if I can find a pay phone that's not just there for show, and booting up my computer to make a call in an emergency situation is probably the last thing I'd think of doing when disaster strikes (I don't have money in my Skype account, and grabbing my credit card and registering it with Skype is probably down there on the list, too). There's a lot of people in this boat. Collectively, we call ourselves "college students".