Do you want/have children?

[95527]

Life isn't worth living if you are not going to get kids.

you know, i'm almost past the age of being able to bear children (thank goodness!) and i can honestly say that i've NEVER been maternally inclined, nor have i ever felt that my life was lacking in some way because i opted out. remaining firm in my decision has put me on the receiving end of hostility more times than i care to recall. it's funny when folks discover my real opinion of children... talk about being a pariah!

*shrugs* i don't think there's anything wrong with not wanting to have kids. sometimes a person just isn't cut out to be a parent. i've known plenty of women (and men) that didn't want children but had them anyway. i think that's a far worse situation; such environments can be tragic for 'unwanted' children.

despite my opinion, i do admit that actually telling a man that i didn't want children was one of the hardest things i had to do while i was in a relationship.



/childless and fulfilled

 

[Queso]

Life isn't worth living if you are not going to get kids.

You obviously have a much duller life than I do.

 

[leekohler]

You obviously have a much duller life than I do.

Yeah- I couldn't possibly do it. My cat is my kid. She's enough. I'm just too busy. I'd have to have some sort of person, like a nanny, to raise them. I don't make that kind of money.

 

[Aeolius]

I respect people who choose to adopt, but I plan to marry and have my own children.

You CAN do both, you know. My wife and I had three kids the old-fashioned way, then adopted three more. Now they are 14, 14, 10, 7, 5, and 4 years of age. We have insured our immortality

 

[ucfgrad93]

My wife and I have 2 children.

 

[cantthinkofone]

I'm 21 one and will be a dad this comming january. I can't wait. I have wanted to be a dad for about a year and a half now. And i got what i wanted:

--amazing girlfriend soon to be fiance

--kid on the way

I couldn't have a better person to be with, or to have kids with. she is amazing with kids and i know she will be a great mom/wife.

 

[foidulus]

Way too much economic uncertainty to have one imo. You gotta provide for them for at least 18 years, and I still worry about whether or not I will be able to provide for myself next year....saving money like crazy and will probably invest it so that I dont have to constantly worry about my next pay check, but there is no way I could support a kid like that....

 

[redwarrior]

Way too much economic uncertainty to have one imo. You gotta provide for them for at least 18 years, and I still worry about whether or not I will be able to provide for myself next year....saving money like crazy and will probably invest it so that I dont have to constantly worry about my next pay check, but there is no way I could support a kid like that....

One thing you have to realize though, is that if you raise them to be conscientious, caring people, they will eventually care for you, and see that your life is much better than it would've been if you were left in the state's care.

 

[iJohnHenry]

Ah, but that takes effort, and with couples today, I am reminded of The Cat's In The Cradle, by Harry Chapin.

 

[redwarrior]

Ah, but that takes effort, and with couples today, I am reminded of The Cat's In The Cradle, by Harry Chapin.

Very true, you get out of it what you put into it, like everything else in life.

 

[echeck]

why not enjoy ourselves a bit before making the ultimate commitment?

but try to tell her that and its straight to the moon alice!

Why assume that having children means the end of your life? The fun may be different, but it can still be fun.

I whole-heartedly agree with waiting a few years before you have children. My wife and I dated for three and still waited four years before we had our son.

Now obviously that doesn't fit in with everyone, but I think it's a great idea to spend a few quality years together beforehand, because children change nearly EVERY aspect of your relationship.

Great Honeymooner's reference, by the way.

 

[rican]

No kids for this homo.

Word... lol

 

[Iscariot]

Wow, what an utterly bizarre post. I disagree with nearly every opinion which you share in this post.

I agree with one thing in his post: he must not reproduce under any circumstances.

A lot of what he says makes a lot of sense, actually. By virtue of being in the first world, our children will almost certainly take up a disproportionate amount of available resources and be responsible for a disproportionate amount of environmental damage. With little exception, the more industrialized the nation the greater the ecological footprint we have as individuals. IF that is something that matters to you, then it is perfectly logical not to want kids because of the environmental impact.

it's funny when folks discover my real opinion of children... talk about being a pariah!

And how! I loved being talked down to when I was younger about it, too.

One thing you have to realize though, is that if you raise them to be conscientious, caring people, they will eventually care for you, and see that your life is much better than it would've been if you were left in the state's care.

Superheroes don't end up in state care, my love.

 

[redwarrior]

Superheroes don't end up in state care, my love.

Spoken like a true scientist! But, you, Iscariot, will always have giving souls around you who's sole purpose is to cater to your every desire..... Where can I sign up?

 

[rajalot]

You obviously have a much duller life than I do.

Dunno, I'm a engineer student after all. Oh, and as the past 7 years in my life have been pretty much just travelling, boozing, sexing, studying & hanging with friends, it really starts to feel dull. Live when you're young, true maturity comes automatically thereafter.

A lot of what he says makes a lot of sense, actually. By virtue of being in the first world, our children will almost certainly take up a disproportionate amount of available resources and be responsible for a disproportionate amount of environmental damage. With little exception, the more industrialized the nation the greater the ecological footprint we have as individuals. IF that is something that matters to you, then it is perfectly logical not to want kids because of the environmental impact.

Disagreed. Poverty is the greatest threat to enviroment, because they don't have economical means to keep enviroment clean. Just visit some 3rd world city like Bombay and then go to NY for comparison and you'll see what I mean. Furthermore, poor countries without proper infrastructure and scientific funding have no hope to find new means to produce cleaner energy, as they are still struggling at bare upkeeping costs of old coal plants. The future of whole Earth rests on industrialized, advanced nations. Sahara is not spreading because I buy an iMac, it's spreading because people living there don't have modern electricity and cause deforestation because they are cutting down everything in order to cook their durra. If energy infrastructure of Germany would be on par with Sudan while living standards ceteris paribus, there would be no forests anymore in whole Europe. That's one example. People have to first fill basic needs, then make sure their kids are OK and after those steps it's finally possible to pay attention to greater things like global warming or cleaning of toxic waste from enviroment.

 

[és:]

A lot of what he says makes a lot of sense, actually. By virtue of being in the first world, our children will almost certainly take up a disproportionate amount of available resources and be responsible for a disproportionate amount of environmental damage. With little exception, the more industrialized the nation the greater the ecological footprint we have as individuals. IF that is something that matters to you, then it is perfectly logical not to want kids because of the environmental impact.

That's utter nonsense, for a start.

He thinks the world's population should be cut by half. That's 3.5 billion people. He thinks that having children is selfish and people should have their natural right of reproduction taken away from them.

He never mentioned environmental damage, let alone made up some fanciful story about our children taking up a disproportionate amount of resources because they live in the first world. In actual fact he made no separation based on where the children come from.

 

[richard.mac]

yes i do. cant wait! bringing up a child and seeing how much they are like you and seeing them through school, sports, social outings is just priceless

 

[CalBoy]

That's utter nonsense, for a start.

He thinks the world's population should be cut by half. That's 3.5 billion people. He thinks that having children is selfish and people should have their natural right of reproduction taken away from them.

He never mentioned environmental damage, let alone made up some fanciful story about our children taking up a disproportionate amount of resources because they live in the first world. In actual fact he made no separation based on where the children come from.

Be mindful, however, that Iscariot isn't actually defending everything that that poster said, but rather providing another viewpoint on the topic. First World children do indeed consume far more resources and cause much more environmental damage. If this is a major concern for you, you would perhaps want to have fewer or no children. You might also decide to raise your children following sustainable practices and teach them how to conserve resources (something my children will know early on).

 

[MrSmith]

First World children do indeed consume far more resources and cause much more environmental damage. If this is a major concern for you, you would perhaps want to have fewer or no children.

I guess you're very young. Life doesn't work like this.

You might also decide to raise your children following sustainable practices and teach them how to conserve resources (something my children will know early on).

Like when your child starts to draw a picture stop them unless the paper has been recycled three times and a branch has grown to replace it?

 

[és:]

Be mindful, however, that Iscariot isn't actually defending everything that that poster said

No, not everything. Just a lot.

'A lot of what he says makes a lot of sense, actually'

but rather providing another viewpoint on the topic. First World children do indeed consume far more resources and cause much more environmental damage.

That's not true. Certainly not necessarily true. It's a straw man.

 

[motulist]

Newsweek article entitled "True or False: Having Kids Makes You Happy"

"parents are about 7 percentage points less likely to report being happy than the childless."

"Parents experience lower levels of emotional well-being, less frequent positive emotions and more frequent negative emotions than their childless peers... In fact, no group of parents—married, single, step or even empty nest—reported significantly greater emotional well-being than people who never had children. It's such a counterintuitive finding because we have these cultural beliefs that children are the key to happiness and a healthy life, and they're not."

http://www.newsweek.com/id/143792?tid=relatedcl

 

[Abstract]

Couples with children live longer by an average of around 6 years, last I read (years ago).

Of course, people with pets they love have a lifespan that's 2 years longer than non-pet owners, so I guess 3 pets = 1 child.

 

[mad jew]

I'd have had 'em six months ago if the woman thing'd let me. She's only 20, so I guess that's fair...

 

[PowerFullMac]

Nope, wayyyy more important things to worry about, it goes something like this:

Get job -> get DeLorean -> start business -> be rich -> buy a posh flat -> buy a HUGE HD TV and watch South Park all day everyday, and browse the net, when I retire.

Got it all planned out!

I get very very annoyed when people assume I will get married and have children, I say no!!! I wont!

 

[0098386]

I suppose by there being less kids running around, there would be smaller classroom sizes, less vehicles on the roads ferrying these brats around (when they could walk), less numties throwing stuff at cars.

This could be a plan.