"Written by someone who hasn't used an Android phone and/or
[...] one in several years" -- ??? I'm assuming you meant "
owned one"? I also assume you meant myself? Or you? I'd respond to that, but that wasn't coherent enough to even guess.
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Think of it like Windows. Yes, it's good, and you're right - it works just fine out of the box.
Then updates happen, settings change, things get installed and deleted, and then there you have it, the end-result of the user. Different each time, although they all started out "stock". All like unique cars at a show.
Be realistic, and join the real world. How many people just use their smart phone out-of-the-box, without making any changes?
A) Users that buy smart phones don't buy them to leave them stock. They're always customized.
B) If for some reason the user isn't tech-savvy, or doesn't care to change anything since purchase, I'd like to shake their hand for not tweaking every little thing ever offered.
I don't customize these phones. They all come to me at different points, running different versions, all with personal touches.
But I love that you implied I said Android Phones didn't work out-of-the-box. Yes, that's precisely what I said.