You do know that you can tailor the canned responses right? I use those frequently. I have a hard time feeling the phone vibrate in my pocket, so the watch greatly increases my receipt of notifications, and is a little less noticeable to check the message without pulling out my 6s Plus.
You can't remember to put on a watch in the morning? Seriously... how do you remember to take your phone off the charger and put that in your suit pocket? What if you aren't wearing a suit? Just because you owned a watch doesn't mean that you knew how to use it. Or, if you can't remember to put it on, that's relative.
How many in this thread out of millions that bought it? Somewhat less than a rounding error... not the 90% you've leaped to. If you judge product success by how many complain in threads in this forum, then by your assessment the iPhone would be a total failure. Here's a little more substantive sample -
https://www.macrumors.com/2015/07/20/apple-watch-tops-iphone-ipad-customer-sat/ Everyone I've seen out in the wild that had one said they loved it.
If you don't like the watch, that's fine... but trying to equate your dissatisfaction to the product being a failure and that 90% have been returned is total BS. That's quite an ego you have for yourself there. The AW does have a learning curve and requires a time investment to tweak and adapt it into your daily workflow. Doesn't sound like you wanted to, or knew how to, do that.