I knew I liked you - so I saved you a seat next to me on the loser couch. Here we can lament our teams disappointing us and exchange John Lackey/A-Rod horror stories.
I'm pretty sure that's your only insult, because given how embarrassing the Red Sox were in September, if I were a fairweather fan I wouldn't a) be in this thread, b) still admit to being a Red Sox fan, and c) be sparring with trash-talking Phillies fans. So bite me.
Let's call it the couch of not winning.
And extra points for ending your post with bite me.