Alright, so this is going to be a long post and I hope you can put up with it. There's this girl I met back when I was in grade 10 and we instantly became friends. I liked her when I first met her but never made my feelings totally apparent, but I did initiate phone calls and such with her because I asked her to semi-formal. She rejected me because she wanted to just go as a group which she in fact did. Eventually our friendship picked up very quickly and we became best friends literally. We hung out 7 days a week and talked on the phone all day and night every day. At the time I guess you could say I didn't have the same experience that I do now. She was very flirty and I fell into the trap that maybe she actually liked me back. We went to a coldplay concert, her favourite band where she said it was a life changing moment for her, and as we were heading home i tried to kiss her. It ended horrible and she literally ran away from me. We spoke a few days later and we had a big argument about it. Afterwards things went back to normal and everything was the same. Similar events happen on and off for a bit. Then there is a period I get a girlfriend. I didn't really like my girlfriend to much at the time. During the period I went out with this girl, my friend and me had some of the best times ever. She became very flirty and everything that was already at a pretty awesome level got better. She was obviously jealous as we had a fight about it later when I tried to again make a move on her. She admited it to me. So time goes on and she heads to university. This is the same school that i wanted to go to and I some how convinced her to go there. I on the other hand decide to take a year off.
During this year the relationship was good but it slowly started to go down hill. At first she called me long distance and made all the effort she could to contact me. Then after a while she just slipped away. She finally came back after her first year and again our relationship strengthened. But then things get weird. I started to get extremely jealous of everyone and anyone she mentioned that was a guy. I also ended up finding out about dates with guys that she had that she didn't want to tell me. I start to keep to myself a lot more and im more distant and quiet. Eventually I try and warm back up to her and she comes back to visit me for New Years this year. We go to the New Years party and she ends up getting drunk and i catch her dry humping and making out with my friend. My friend tells me that he was drunk too but still told her that I would get mad and not to do this. She says she doesn't care and does it anyway. I see them and I just about explode. I grabbed my friend by the neck and held him up against the wall and was about to punch him but I stopped myself. I was the DD for her and was taking care of her. I told her as she lay drunk on the couch to find her own way home and began to get ready to leave. She looks at me with the sweet eyes that I love and says to me, But Mike you promisedd you'd take care of me. So I drove her home. She pukes several times and I do everything in my power to help her. I even touch all the puke to try and clean her up. I get her to her room and she pushes me away telling me to just GO. it was very hard on me. Afterwards she asked me to come out as if nothing even happend. We went to a movie and we still hadn't talked about it. We ended up having a small argument at the theater. I asked her if she was mad at me for something I did. We ended up talking about it after when we got back to her house and she said she felt like her life wasn't going anywhere. I of course consoled her and etc. Afterwards I pretty much cut contact for 2 months.
She tried to make contact at first but I quickly found ways to keep myself busy so that it didn't seem like I was purposely ignoring her. Now she isn't quite affectionate as before obviously. I finally said screw it and decided to talk to her. We had 5 years of friendship and I missed her alot. I actually love her.. So we have begun conversation and talking again and it's doing really well. She is talking to me and calling me again and looks forward to seeing me. Heres what I want to ask. Right now I'm probably digging myself deeper into the already bottemless pit known as the friend zone. I work for her family , our family's are tight and her brother looks up to me. I want this girl more than anything. She has started clubbing alot more among other things and probably other things. She's recently really gotten into making her self look hot aka LOTS of make up and skanky clothes. What do i do here. I love the girl but i hurts my heart alot if I hear anything about other guys. Everyone tells me to cut my losses because she isnt worth it, but I beg differ. I'm willing to go through alot if i can get her, and have been un knowing to the result. So where do I go from here? I really am hopeless on this and I appreciate and feedback and advice I can take.
During this year the relationship was good but it slowly started to go down hill. At first she called me long distance and made all the effort she could to contact me. Then after a while she just slipped away. She finally came back after her first year and again our relationship strengthened. But then things get weird. I started to get extremely jealous of everyone and anyone she mentioned that was a guy. I also ended up finding out about dates with guys that she had that she didn't want to tell me. I start to keep to myself a lot more and im more distant and quiet. Eventually I try and warm back up to her and she comes back to visit me for New Years this year. We go to the New Years party and she ends up getting drunk and i catch her dry humping and making out with my friend. My friend tells me that he was drunk too but still told her that I would get mad and not to do this. She says she doesn't care and does it anyway. I see them and I just about explode. I grabbed my friend by the neck and held him up against the wall and was about to punch him but I stopped myself. I was the DD for her and was taking care of her. I told her as she lay drunk on the couch to find her own way home and began to get ready to leave. She looks at me with the sweet eyes that I love and says to me, But Mike you promisedd you'd take care of me. So I drove her home. She pukes several times and I do everything in my power to help her. I even touch all the puke to try and clean her up. I get her to her room and she pushes me away telling me to just GO. it was very hard on me. Afterwards she asked me to come out as if nothing even happend. We went to a movie and we still hadn't talked about it. We ended up having a small argument at the theater. I asked her if she was mad at me for something I did. We ended up talking about it after when we got back to her house and she said she felt like her life wasn't going anywhere. I of course consoled her and etc. Afterwards I pretty much cut contact for 2 months.
She tried to make contact at first but I quickly found ways to keep myself busy so that it didn't seem like I was purposely ignoring her. Now she isn't quite affectionate as before obviously. I finally said screw it and decided to talk to her. We had 5 years of friendship and I missed her alot. I actually love her.. So we have begun conversation and talking again and it's doing really well. She is talking to me and calling me again and looks forward to seeing me. Heres what I want to ask. Right now I'm probably digging myself deeper into the already bottemless pit known as the friend zone. I work for her family , our family's are tight and her brother looks up to me. I want this girl more than anything. She has started clubbing alot more among other things and probably other things. She's recently really gotten into making her self look hot aka LOTS of make up and skanky clothes. What do i do here. I love the girl but i hurts my heart alot if I hear anything about other guys. Everyone tells me to cut my losses because she isnt worth it, but I beg differ. I'm willing to go through alot if i can get her, and have been un knowing to the result. So where do I go from here? I really am hopeless on this and I appreciate and feedback and advice I can take.