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Your help on this positively crazy relationship

I can't take a screenshot, but if you can see the google ads I see, then maybe that's your answer...


("Save your relationship even if your partner doesn't want to, in 20 easy minutes" is especially promising)
 
Forget it. You got friendzoned a long time ago and you aren't gonna get out. This girl seems like trouble anyways.

Find someone else that actually likes you.
 
Been there done that. Get rid of her. Don't initiate contact. Don't talk to her friends. And don't keep lying to yourself. It's not going to happen. Yes, that may be harsh, but you are looking a bit like an older brother if you can't take one of your friends dry humping her and obviously she doesn't feel anything for you beyond friends. Get in to college and you'll forget about her overnight, because there are so many prospects. Life gets better. In time you'll look back at yourself and wonder why you were so naive.
 
Abstract said:
<long post>
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You actually probably gave me the best advice I'v heard in my life. I'v been doing a lot of thinking about this situation and I don't want anything of it anymore. I wanna put my life first and I sure as hell don't want to be someone's doormat. A lot of your comments are justified and I appreciate the criticism because generally I wont listen and trust my own judgement, even when asking for advice. I tend to only look for the advice telling me what I want to hear. But really I have to say it's funny that this thread in a mac rumours forum of all places has given me some really great caring advice. You all have experience and maybe its time I started listening. I guess my next move is to completely cut all ties. That is going to be very difficult and I don't even know where to begin. Any suggestions anyone?
 
You constantly use me like I'm your doormat and I'm tired of it, have a nice life?

Too harsh/unrealistic?

"Cut myself free, willingly, stop just what's killing me"
 
Sorry if that upsets you, I'm known for my bluntness.

It's short, sweet and most importantly to the point. If you draw it out, you're just gonna set yourself back up for failure again.
 
Yeah, it's fine don't worry about it. I appreciate the overall message anyway.
 
Abstract said:
I'm not a dating specialist, but "running away" is the 1st sign that things aren't going well with a girl.
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Best line in a long time! :D

To the OP, grow a backbone.

You are not in the "friend zone", because this girl is not your friend. Friends don't do you like this. As Abstract alluded to, you are in the "doormat zone".

This is not a movie, there's no happy ending, you will not get the girl.

So go get a better girl. Because anyone who has put up with that kind of crap deserves better.
 
This thread reminds me of Forrest Gump and Jenny...Hopefully, it doesn't end the same way.

I say - don't continue to be a victim of her immaturity and lack of self control and look elsewhere for romance...
 
mgacam2 said:
That is going to be very difficult and I don't even know where to begin. Any suggestions anyone?
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Here's one of my favorites. I'm the sh**, you're not, see ya.


Seriously though, no resolution is necessary, just stop talking. Take her number off of your cellphone, her SN off of iChat, and whatever else you use. If she calls, you probably know her number, don't answer and don't return messages. She's hasn't been treating you like a friend should treat you, so forget the pleasantries, it's not worth the trouble.
 
mgacam2 said:
You actually probably gave me the best advice I'v heard in my life. I'v been doing a lot of thinking about this situation and I don't want anything of it anymore. I wanna put my life first and I sure as hell don't want to be someone's doormat. A lot of your comments are justified and I appreciate the criticism because generally I wont listen and trust my own judgement, even when asking for advice. I tend to only look for the advice telling me what I want to hear. But really I have to say it's funny that this thread in a mac rumours forum of all places has given me some really great caring advice. You all have experience and maybe its time I started listening. I guess my next move is to completely cut all ties. That is going to be very difficult and I don't even know where to begin. Any suggestions anyone?
Click to expand...

Look, I think she's probably a great friend, and she gives you 85% of the things you want from a girlfriend. She may be fun to hang around, comfortable for you, understanding, and accepting of your flaws. I don't know why you said you love her. However, she's not willing to give you the other 15% of herself to make this a relationship. That's all you need to hear from me to understand that this won't work out in the end, as she has tried to give that other 15% to other guys.

You can tell her that if you want.

Tell her that it's hurting you, and by not talking is the only way for you to move on. She can obviously move on, but you're having a harder time.

Remember, "distance makes the heart grow fonder". If you really have a shot, clinging to her isn't going to make it happen. A few years, and a few relationships that don't work out may help you both know what you want a bit more clearly. However, don't get your hopes up with this girl, and don't make the same mistake again with the next girl. Realize your own self-worth.
 
mgacam2 said:
You actually probably gave me the best advice I'v heard in my life. I'v been doing a lot of thinking about this situation and I don't want anything of it anymore. I wanna put my life first and I sure as hell don't want to be someone's doormat. A lot of your comments are justified and I appreciate the criticism because generally I wont listen and trust my own judgement, even when asking for advice. I tend to only look for the advice telling me what I want to hear. But really I have to say it's funny that this thread in a mac rumours forum of all places has given me some really great caring advice. You all have experience and maybe its time I started listening. I guess my next move is to completely cut all ties. That is going to be very difficult and I don't even know where to begin. Any suggestions anyone?
Click to expand...

Hand her a rolled up doormat, and say "now you don't need me anymore"?
 
Iscariot said:
Hand her a rolled up doormat, and say "now you don't need me anymore"?
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although i think this would be hilarious to do, it would definitely shut out the OP's chance for later if the 'heart grows fonder' thing works out.

to the OP, tell her you care about her, but she obviously doesn't feel the same way and you feel used so it's time you just move on. no hard feelings, but you need to go your separate way.

to put closure, report back when you tell her pls.

good luck,
keebler
 
I second Keebler's advice

It's a courteous way of saying **** off, and life is too short to live without courtesy.

Also, take every single thing that reminds you of her and

a) burn it

or, if you cannot bring yourself to do that

b) put it into storage until you have forgotten about her

welcome to your life!
:):apple:
 
Researchers at my favorite university did a study recently that might bode well for you in your life after this girl:

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/80259.php

A quote from the article about it: "But a new Northwestern University study shows that lovers, especially those madly in love, do much better -- almost immediately -- following a breakup than they imagined they would."

Cut your ties, it won't hurt as much as you think.
 
Yeah...
As trite as it sounds,
If you really love her, then you'll love her enough to let her go.

But before you do, sit down and have a heart-to-heart explaining your actions previous and present.

If there really was or is anything there, then she needs to tell you...and not give you mixed signals. As awful as it is, no one should have to go through that and have their heart yanked out of their chest...just because she knows she can.

Good luck with whatever you choose.
If you decide against cutting ties...then at least don't put yourself in the situation where she is in control of your feelings. (keep her as much at bay as she is keeping you)

:eek:
 
Nicolecat said:
Yeah...
As trite as it sounds,
If you really love her, then you'll love her enough to let her go.
Click to expand...

I guess I bristle against this because it suggests that the OP has some responsibility to *her* here. I think the worst thing he can do is to resort to any action (even the right one) on the basis of doing something for her. He's done more than enough for her and needs to start looking out for his own needs and feelings.
 
I tried to make some action to get break all contact, and in the end I decided against it. I'm trying to embrace all the things I hate and take them in a positive note. Our relationship has improved dramatically over the last few weeks because I'm not holding anything back, aka feelings or things that bug me. I'm being straight up and it's putting my mind a little more at ease. But I do still want her =P
 
You are hopeless dude, what a devoted spineless doormat of a guy.
You asked for it, you will surely get it.
We all warned you.
:mad:
 
mgacam2 said:
I tried to make some action to get break all contact, and in the end I decided against it. I'm trying to embrace all the things I hate and take them in a positive note. Our relationship has improved dramatically over the last few weeks because I'm not holding anything back, aka feelings or things that bug me. I'm being straight up and it's putting my mind a little more at ease. But I do still want her =P
Click to expand...

So what in essence you are saying is that you've learned nothing over the past five years, and are willing to be a spineless, snivelling twerp for the rest of your life, because you can't get over one cute girl who treats you like utter crap?

Boy, you sure are turning that into a positive, eh? A positive for her, because she doesn't lose her little lost puppy dog following her around at her mercy.

You know why people say you can't get out of the friend zone? It's because you can't get out of the friend zone.

You know why people say you're a doormat? It's because you're a doormat.

You know why she made out with one of your friends right in front of you? Because not only does not love you, she doesn't even respect you. You aren't even enough of a blip on her radar to care whether or not everyone else knows just how much she's walking all over you. And why should she respect you? You not only let her walk on you, you look for opportunities to do it. Like right now. You got down on your hands and knees and you asked her to step all over your dignity.

Dude, wake up. Do it now before you waste any more of your life.
 
fail.jpg


You clearly learned nothing. What Iscariot said is the truth, I'd reconsider buddy.
 
Too bad the OP doesn't list where he lives. If he's put up with this crap for so long, she must be pretty hot, and she seems to get off on watching him get pushed around. Seems like all I'd need are a couple of beers and a complete disregard for him and I'd be in like sin.
 
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