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Apple's Siri Learns New Jokes

Virinprew said:
That’s very useful. Thanks Apple. /s
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Is bowling useful?

Love how people act like everything has to have some inherent utility to be worth anything.

MOST of what we do for fun and even otherwise isn't useful. It's called FUN.

And no, this doesn't mean Apple can't work on more important things or the entire company is spending their time writing jokes for Siri.
 
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Adding few lines of canned material to a feature people dont use after the first day of getting an iPhone, is not going to save Siri. Im sure a few extra jokes will close the gap to the AI neural net search algorithm wizz-bang magics the competitors are using </S>.

Fun thing to do if you have Siri and a google home. Aks both "how much does homepod weigh". The results are not suprising anymore.
 
I really don’t see canned if-then humor as a deficiency with Siri.

They really could do this all they wanted if Siri worked better at interpreting my sentences better than 1980’s “AI”
 
I for one, cannot stand Siri's snide remarks. If I tell it to do something, just do it and that's it. I don't need a funny (irritating) little remark after she does it.
 
I thought the Siri team was prioritizing efforts to get their assistant out of third place, unless they’ve come to peace with being third best and now have “free time” to pursue trivial upgrades.
 
Siri ! How do you know Cooks a liar ?
Sir: His lips are moving.
Siri ! How do you know Ive's a total banker ?
Siri: That's not a question. That's a statement.
Siri ! Whats the weather today ?
Siri: £4 a pound but it's cheaper by the yard.
 
ConfusedChris said:
I think I know what is going on.
Siri is short for Sirius Cybernetics Corporation. Douglas Adams predicted decades ago how painful technology with Genuine People Personalities would be.
http://hitchhikers.wikia.com/wiki/Genuine_People_Personalities
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Sounds about right. Here’s Siri’s explanation:

B94E341D-749C-4A80-8EE7-C59DFCCB69F9.jpeg



Judging by the above refusal to discuss it any further, perhaps somebody caught Siri admitting that she is meant to be contradictory...

So, I thought I’d ask her about Tim Cook... but alas, it would appear he was there with a menacing expression overlooking her as she answered my question:

42BEF5F9-45A5-4B49-951D-54658EA15992.jpeg



I waited until she was alone again... and I asked her where I might find some broken computers. I’m always looking for bargain surplus parts.

But then Siri surprised me by admitting that Apple headquarters has broken computers. Perhaps this explains the problem. Or... perhaps this was Siri’s way of letting me know what Apple will do if she dared to answer my questions honestly.

8EBFE6D0-AA1B-49AD-84E1-0E57D60A8E5A.jpeg
 
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Z3man said:
Are you sure, those are some of the worst jokes i have ever heard, i am not even sure you can class them as jokes.

If jokes are the best thing Siri can do, Apple might as well withdraw Siri now.
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lol...tend to agree but my 10 year loves Siri's jokes o_O
 
Baymowe335 said:
Is bowling useful?

Love how people act like everything has to have some inherent utility to be worth anything.

MOST of what we do for fun and even otherwise isn't useful. It's called FUN.

And no, this doesn't mean Apple can't work on more important things or the entire company is spending their time writing jokes for Siri.
Click to expand...

Obviously Apple can work on many things at one time and yes it is fun to have some personality. However, there are a lot of basic things that Siri should be able to do that it either doesn't do or struggles with. I will say that one of them that made me shake my head is that for the longest time you could not ask what news sources it offered after the release of the news podcast support. You just had to know that they offered NPR, CNN, Washington Post, Fox News or ESPN News. Thankfully, it would seem that is now fixed as for the first time just now it properly advised me of my choices after starting with NPR.

I think most people's gripe is that obvious things like that seem to get missed whereas they are always ahead of the curve with the personality stuff. The next on my list that they absolutely have to fix is when you ask for directions to a city and state that it never starts you down the path of some location in another state or country. For goodness sake, just say you don't know and ask for some other description of your destination. For example, ask Siri for directions to Cullman, Alabama. Without fail it will give you directions to a town called Coleman in Texas. The logic should know that Texas is not Alabama even if the rest of the description is quite similar.
 
TheBensonBoy said:
Although the jokes are actually funny, she is still useless. Telling me a freaking joke will not add stuff to my calendar, turn on my alarm, and any other basic thing she should do, any better
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I think we all need to remember that YMMV (Your Mileage May Vary). Siri works GREAT at setting and adjusting my alarms... from across the room to my iPhone. Never ever had a problem with this feature of Siri.
 
I really hate it when Siri tries to be funny - especially when it's so sh3t at anything apart from setting a timer - and even then every 5th timer results in a dumb quip.

Of course the reason that some new jokes have been added: this will get a mention on CNBC, MSN etc and the rest of the MSM as a closer segment, reminding people that have given up on Siri to try it again, and put Apple back into the water-cooler news. Way to go Tim...
 
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