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GayWay - the gay and lesbian discussion (aka. Any Gays here?)

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I've been hearing 'family' less and less since I can remember, and I don't think I've heard it said in the past year, I've used it in conversation once or twice, and not everyone knew what I was talking about. So maybe it's on the way out. Which is too bad, i hoped one day we'd all act like one :)

i think gen Y wants to adopt all the negative slurs as slang, that's what i hear the most. i hope it doesn't become another n-word situation, which is sort of a running joke to mainstream america...
 
The term "family" is old, at least for me (I'm 27 and I live in Norway), but I know it is still used here sometimes. The full expression here is "friend of the family", I think.
 
It's already happening

rainman::|:| said:
I think gen Y wants to adopt all the negative slurs as slang, that's what i hear the most. i hope it doesn't become another n-word situation, which is sort of a running joke to mainstream america...
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I use "family" sometimes. It's probably my favorite. But, I think we're already having the problem similar to the n-word problem. Who the heck in California decided that the Q word was OK? It's just not.

The N-word derives from the latin for black, a color and a good description.

Retard derives from the latin for slow - and is still an accepted word in educational circles (and in music).

Those were descriptive terms that gained a negative connotation.

But Q? It had a full-blown negative definition to begin with and is associated with us by hatred. And yet there are people who throw it around like "family". It really does bother me.

That said - I hope the original poster didn't switch - to Windows or to the Breeder side. :(

:)
 
jsalzer said:
But Q? It had a full-blown negative definition to begin with and is associated with us by hatred. And yet there are people who throw it around like "family". It really does bother me.
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Being a California resident I have not once seen the word "queer" in a negative context. Rather it has become more of an umbrella term and sounds a helluva lot better than GLBTQQIA and all that alphabet soup nonsense. The word queer itself doesn't automatically have a negative connotation to it, just because something is perceived to be weird or a bit odd doesn't automatically mean its a bad thing (not that I'm saying that gay/lesbian/trans/whatever is a bad thing). But just because a word has had a negative attachment in the past doesn't mean it has to have one now.
 
vniow said:
Being a California resident I have not once seen the word "queer" in a negative context. Rather it has become more of an umbrella term and sounds a helluva lot better than GLBTQQIA and all that alphabet soup nonsense. The word queer itself doesn't automatically have a negative connotation to it, just because something is perceived to be weird or a bit odd doesn't automatically mean its a bad thing (not that I'm saying that gay/lesbian/trans/whatever is a bad thing). But just because a word has had a negative attachment in the past doesn't mean it has to have one now.
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Being from the South, I hear it all the time. And worse. But most of them don't bother me. The only one that gets to me is ******. I cannot stand that word. Because I am not a ******. No one is. No one deserves to be described as a ******.

There is something I've noticed, down here at least. For some reason, if a gay man calls another gay man queer, fag, homo, etc, it's lighthearted joke or a simple descriptive term. When a straight person says it, it's derogatory. I don't mean just taken as such, like ****** is (although it is), I mean used. I have never once heard a straight man use any such word not in an attempt to insult or hurt someone, and I have never heard a gay man use it in any way other than as a joke, or just to say "Hey, I'm gay too".

It actually intrested me quite a bit where the words came from. The only one I could find a definative answer for was ******. A preacher was on a talk show (forgot the name of preacher, and talk show, but the preacher was quite famous for anti-gay sentiments) and throughout the show refered to homosexuals as "faggots". At the end of the show, he was asked why he called them that, and he answered "Because I believe they should be rolled together and burned, like a ****** on the fire." Pretty harsh eh?

But whatever the word or conotation, I think what we all need to realize is that they are just words. And words mean nothing. The only thing that matters is the intent in which they are said. "Words only matter if you're angry"

Damn I hope I got that quote right...
 
Guitarius said:
Being from the South, I hear it all the time. And worse. But most of them don't bother me. The only one that gets to me is ******. I cannot stand that word. Because I am not a ******. No one is. No one deserves to be described as a ******.
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Yeah...in the time between when I was what...twelve years old? -- and moving to the South, I hadn't heard "******" used as a general slur.... Hmmmm. All good things must come to an end? :(
 
Pull out the dictionary (yuck)

vniow said:
Being a California resident I have not once seen the word "queer" in a negative context...The word queer itself doesn't automatically have a negative connotation to it
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I'm not normally a "pull out the dictionary" kind of guy, but for family, I'll do it. :)

Q (which, in Illinois, has ONLY a negative connotation):

1. Strange or odd
2. of questionable nature of character, shady
3. not physically right or well
4. mentally unbalanced or deranged

These were the original meanins of the word, long before it was used for family. It became used for family because it was felt that the things above described us.

This is much different than "N" or "Retard", which were accurate and non-judgemental descriptors when they originated.

I just wish Cali would have polled the rest of the country before developing a show for cable that would catch on.

I know words mean much less than the intention of the person behind them. But, I just can't get behind this one.

Besides, who says I'm odd? The voices? Are they talking about me again? :p
 
I went to the Matthew Shepard Foundation benefit dinner thing a few weeks back and was truly impressed by Judy Shepard's speech. She talked about how sad and angry it makes her feel when she hears people use any sort of word like 'gay', 'queer', or '******' in a negative or hateful context, whether the person uttering realizes or not exactly what the implications of it are. Since hearing that, I've been much more forward about confronting people when they say things like that, and in explaining to them what they are really saying. Most don't realize it, while others don't care.

P.S. - The best thing Mrs. Shepard said all evening: "Come out and be out." :)
 
When gays take another word for gay with a negative connotation, like queer for instance, and use it in a neutral or positive manner, it gradually takes the edge off the word. In the long run it also works to take the edge off being gay in general.

This has been done with success in several languages and countries. Not that this is an organized strategy or anything, though. (World domination next. ;) )

I don't like the word "family" because it is designed to be a discreet word that was suitable for the times when gays had to live in the closet. There's nothing strange or negative about being gay, so there no need to hide it.
 
so yeah, gay guy here too (also a little late to this thread...). i think there's some kind of predisposition to being a mac user/gay versus the general population. complete speculation, but seems to be the case with a lot of my friends...then again, that could just come from me being in a music school, too :p
 
I thought all the Mac users are gay, since Apples have such a fabulous design that they don't attract heterosexuals like me. Yup, all the mac users are gay geeks! Shame on you! Gayness is the Devils work! And so is Apple the Gay Computer Company! :mad:









/me takes a better look at my signature

Oh well, seems like my stereotypes failed again. :( Unless I turn gay in Friday after receiving iBook the White Gaytop! :mad: :D
 
Very interesting thread, this. Took the test and scored 70% gay... That's what you get for being female and knowing how to change oil on a car :D :eek:My husband came in to see why I was laughing, and scored a 23%
I guess that makes both of us the man in our relationship *scratches crotch and reaches for cold, sticky nachos* Hmmmm I wonder what my son will grow up to be :confused:

-squirrel

PS as to the headline, i consider myself to be straight but not religiously :rolleyes:
 
PickledSquirrel said:
That's what you get for being female and knowing how to change oil on a car :D :eek:
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Hee, I feel you on that one. I'm 40% gay, and according to that same test, I'm "a straight-laced girlie girl w/ just a hint of your butch side sometimes popping out!" I guess that oil question really does throw things in a loop.

Question fear, about that atheletic skill, does being a coxswain count?
 
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