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Is there ANY way out...

Jericho2550 said:
So I think you should do things to show her you care, but do your best not to look desperate, hope that helps 🙂
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😛 Nah, I'm not at all desperate, in fact I quite like the independent, single life. It's just spending so much time with someone I want more with, that's driving me crazy.
 
whooleytoo said:
We're quite 'intimate' together like that - but then again she's Spanish, so I don't think that necessarily means anything in her case! 😉
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I'm pretty sure that even Spanish women don't enjoy being touched by men they are repulsed by.

I think she told you about the new guy to see how you'd react. Do us proud. Ask yourself "WWMJD?" ("what would mad jew do?"), then do that (but toned down by a factor of 10 or so).
 
Chundles said:
Sorry mate, the jump to the other ladder is fraught with peril. You're bound to fall into the deep abyss - never to return to either ladder again.
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😛 😛 😛

I recognise you... aren't you one (or several) of the voices in my head?
 
emw said:
Is this one leaving soon as well, or is she here for longer/permanently?
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She's leaving this time next year, planning on travelling around the world I think. (Alone, as far as I'm aware).
 
Chundles said:
Not sure, let me see.

Giiiiivvvvveeee meeeeee monnnneeeeyyyyy.......
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Yup, you're one of me alright. I'm always trying to get money out of me, but never seem to turn a profit.. 😕
 
skunk said:
No such thing. You take on one, you take on the whole of womankind.
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You'd think that would improve my chances of a menage a trois, but so far no luck. 😱

dsnort said:
If you're in there with mad jew, let me confirm that for ya
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Experience talking? 😉
 
jsw said:
I'm pretty sure that even Spanish women don't enjoy being touched by men they are repulsed by.
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Ok, I think I can safely say she's not repulsed by me. 😉

jsw said:
I think she told you about the new guy to see how you'd react.
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I really don't think I'm being paranoid here, but that was how it seemed to me. I made a joke (as I'm wont to do) about hating the guy after hearing only his name, which she seemed strangely chuffed and amused by. 😕
 
Foxglove9 said:
I would find that very offensive and unprofessional for a client to do that to me. So I'm advising against that while on your lessons.
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Yes, but they seemed to have moved from being solely interested in linguistics 😉. It sounded like there were times where they were hanging out together to be hanging out together.
 
MongoTheGeek said:
Yes, but they seemed to have moved from being solely interested in linguistics 😉. It sounded like there were times where they were hanging out together to be hanging out together.
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Yeah, we have. Sometimes we go out for a lesson, and stay out for a while afterwards. On occasion we've met up with other friends, but it's never been a date-date.

p.s. damn you, for putting that cunning linguist joke back into my head! 😉
 
Chundles said:
Sorry mate, the jump to the other ladder is fraught with peril. You're bound to fall into the deep abyss - never to return to either ladder again.
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Indeed, this man speaks sooth.

However, from what you described, this doesn't seem to be the situation you're in. You two are friends, yes, but not quite "friends' zone". The Friends' Zone is a place women put you after courting you. But if you two met, and became friends, fought with flirtations, etc, then it's possibly not "friends" but "courting".

But then again she quite possibly has already put you in the friends' zone without much ado. The only way you can find out in this situation is MAKE A MOVE!

Don't get all weird while in a session. During the next session, ask her out, on strictly non-professional terms. She'll know what you're talking about, and if she goes, then you make the big move (i.e. attempted kissing) on said date.

And a word on the possibility of escaping the Friends' Zone, let me tell you, it is quite possible. My current girlfriend? Yep, I was formerly firmly in her Friend's Zone. I have jumped ladders successfully, and so can you!
 
MongoTheGeek said:
Does she have a boyfriend?

If not just kiss her. Some moment when you are together and laughing, just kiss her. Do it with confidence. Chicks dig assertive guys.

If she returns it you have a yes. If not she you have a no. If she gets upset apologize and forget about it. You can still be friends but in all likelyhood that is all that will happen.

Most importantly, don't overthink it.
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Listen to Mongo, that advice is spot on...kissing a girl out of the blue, with authority is a great idea. You will know within seconds if it was the right descision or not. If not, you never had a chance anyway, and you saved yourself a lot of time and aggrovation, if it works, then it's time for some suger.

🙂
 
As a girl, I say that if I was her and I fancied you, I'd really like you to say/do something. If I didn't fancy you, it would be awkward if you said something.

Helpful? 😛

No, ok, but if I did like you, I'd be over the moon that you said something. If I didn't, yeah, it would be awkward for a bit, but I'd get over it soon enough if you weren't too freaked about it.

Say something. Nothing huge and dramatic. "You know what? I really like you. Let's go out sometime, just the two of us." If she says yes, well, score. 😀 If she says no, say something like "No worries. Better said than not, right? Still friends, yeah?". Smile, be relaxed. It'll be fine. Maybe you'll have put the thought into her head! Maybe not. I agree you can't ever properly regret something you've done, only something you haven't done. Unless that something was burning down your house. 😉

I just read some of the newer posts — I think it sounds like you have a chance. Go for it.

Oh, and everyone I've been out with has been in the friends zone first. And I am still friends with people who I've propositioned and who have propositioned me. It's only awkward if you make it so. 🙂
 
whooleytoo said:
Yeah, we have. Sometimes we go out for a lesson, and stay out for a while afterwards. On occasion we've met up with other friends, but it's never been a date-date.
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So, we've established that the Spanish Teacher is touchy-feely with you, isn't resisting any of your advances, has told you that she has a boyfriend (to make you feel jealous?) and your lessons have over-run into "social meetings" with friends...

What are you waiting for?

Make like Nike, and 'Just Do It' 😉
 
Lau said:
Say something. Nothing huge and dramatic. "You know what? I really like you. Let's go out sometime, just the two of us." If she says yes, well, score. 😀 If she says no, say something like "No worries. Better said than not, right? Still friends, yeah?". Smile, be relaxed. It'll be fine. Maybe you'll have put the thought into her head! Maybe not. I agree you can't ever properly regret something you've done, only something you haven't done. Unless that something was burning down your house. 😉
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Excellent advice. Couldn't agree more. "Faint heart ne'er won fair lady", and this strikes the perfect balance between being aggressive and not putting undo stress on her!

Lau said:
Oh, and everyone I've been out with has been in the friends zone first. And I am still friends with people who I've propositioned and who have propositioned me. It's only awkward if you make it so. 🙂
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Of course i have to bring up the antithesis of this. Everytime a girl has told me "let's just be friends", what she has really meant was " I like you enough to let you take me places and spend money on me, but there's no way I would ever sleep with you!" The look on their faces when I reveal my "friends go dutch treat" rule is priceless! 😀
 
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