Apple OC
macrumors 68040
lets start with ... discharging a firearm in a public place ... did you see the cars going by in the vid?
then pile on the rest
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Fathers Reaction To Facebook Post
- Thread starter tktaylor1
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lets start with ... discharging a firearm in a public place ... did you see the cars going by in the vid?
then pile on the rest
Thomas Veil
macrumors 68030
Well, yeah.
She really has three choices at this point:
- Sit there and take it. (Not a good choice, because who knows how this will escalate.)
- Run away. (Lousy choice, because however tempting the idea may be, it will provide grounds to declare her an unruly child.)
- Apply to become an emancipated minor. (I'm not an attorney, but I imagine for this she will need a job and someone else willing to take her in, as you said.)
thekev
macrumors 604
By your definition obedience is the ultimate goal in raising a child. The father could be a piece of trash, and really you don't know. You know his logic is questionable. Punishment didn't work---> increase scale of punishment. You can tell she was venting, so he takes away the outlet to do so. It's actually pretty sadistic in principle. Right now you're living vicariously through a redneck facebook post, and that is pretty sad.
Unfortunately I think you interpret shocking with good parenting. You're making a mistake that's really common amongst adults in that you're assuming a good parent here. He smokes and feels the need to own a .45. He could be a drug dealer. You don't know. That he thinks it's okay to just shoot something in anger tells me that he's lacking in intelligence, self control, or both. Again his daughter was venting on things by his own description. What do you think is a better alternative there? She sounds upset. If he cared at all, he'd actually think on this. Punishment wasn't working before. What makes you think it'll work now? Use your brain man.
e²Studios
macrumors 68020
Considering he is in a rural part of N.C. he is completely in his rights to discharge the firearm on his property. He was shooting at the ground which means there is no possible way the bullet would have left those boundaries.
Maybe you can argue distance to the road or his home, but its just picking at straws at that point.
firestarter
macrumors 603
We're not talking about N.C. law. Apple O.C. was responding to a question stroked put to me. I'd said that he'd be arrested in the UK, where you can be arrested for carrying in a public place or discharging a gun near a public highway (even when on private property).
stroked
Suspended
DeepIn2U
macrumors G5
I'll agree about the use of the firearm - but I'm north of the border to the USA so take it with a grain of salt. That said, considering he said something about parents putting a boot up their kids ass, I'd rather he take his frustration out on the laptop with a gun then anything physical to his daughter.
By far and low ... kids have it WAAY too easy today!
Many are lazy,
disrespectful,
greedy & self-centered with no idea how hard their parents work to give them things as simple as a roof over their heads, tools for education, transportation, food on the table, and many other things.
this father just was pissed for far too long. I LOVE how he mentioned not to disrespect the hired help!
einmusiker
macrumors 68040
I agree it is over the top but I think people are overreacting to it. It's obviously meant to be ab attention getter and guess what?? even teenage girls have a sense of humor... shocking I know 🙄
firestarter
macrumors 603
- Humiliated in front of friends/family/the world
- Laptop destroyed
- Grounded 'for ever'
Yeah, I bet she LOLed!
Prof.
macrumors 603
He can read just fine, he just has a stuttering problem. I know because I have the same thing and that's exactly how I sound when I read out loud. The dude is not an idiot.
Oh, and for the record: The local police are not pressing charges. In fact, they actually patted the guy on the back.
zioxide
macrumors 603
over-analyzing much?
Option 4: Grow the **** up, stop acting like a bratty little kid, and have some respect for her parents who raised her, provide her with shelter, clothes, food, etc.
What the hell does this have to do with being a good parent? Nothing. And you just lost all credibility by throwing in the "he could be a drug dealer" line. That's just ridiculous and you completely killed your entire argument with that fallacy.
dukebound85
macrumors Core
Haha not sure if serious
If you are claiming that the responsibilities of a kid are on par with those of an adult, you must be on...something
Being a kid today is easy. Sit in class, do some hw, maybe do some light chores around the house like making your bed or unpacking the dishwasher and go have fun with sports. Nice never having to really worry about money, having to produce results at work, or the other myriad of daily encounters adults deal with all the time
Go back a few generations and kids were expected to do real work like help run a farm, work at your parents store, etc. Yea, I feel real sorry for her. Having her own personal computer, probably a persona cell phone, feeling that everything is entitled to her. Yea. she has it rough. Cry me a river
I applaud this dad
For those who are concerned about the use of a firearm? Comeon. It is him making a point. I view it the same as if he were to have taken a sledgehammer to it. I think many here just think that firearms and having them are signs of one being unstable and that is furthest from the truth. However, seeing how the demographics on this board are, it hardly surprises me to see this mindset dsiplayed.....I mean run away? move in with a friend? become emancipated? all from this? Give me a break
If that girl is complaining about her cushy life now, I hope she gets a wakeup call for once she gets out from under her parent's wing and is forced to support herself entirely and realize just how grateful/thankful she should be to her parents that provide her with everything...and all that he asked was to keep up after herself and maybe help out on the community chores like unpack the dishwasher.
But nope, too unreasonable for her. Too much work. She's a slave.
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iJohnHenry
macrumors P6
zioxide
macrumors 603
Uh, most adults lives are way more stressful than that. They have to worry about their jobs (sometimes multiple jobs), bills, putting food on the table, taking care of the house, car, kids (if they have them) etc.
School is a cake walk compared to the real world. Don't kid yourself. 5 hour long classes (and some of them end up being electives like art and music) is nothing compared to an 8-12 hour work shift. I go to college and work full-time. I consider my class days my days off because they are way more relaxing and less stressful than work.
Sweeping the kitchen floor, wiping the counter, emptying the dishwasher, making your own bed, and washing any of your own dirty clothes that you need clean doesn't seem like much. Aside from the laundry (which takes more time because you are waiting for the washer/dryer), those tasks can all be finished in under 15 minutes.
I live here. I see it first hand every day.
He's a hell of a lot more respectful than she was being. A lot more respectable than all the keyboard-mashers online who are saying he's a drug dealer and a bad parent.
This girl needed a wake up call and she got it. She needs to realize she's damn lucky she's not living in a hut in a third-world country with no running water, electricity, doctors, etc.
thekev
macrumors 604
I was having fun with it. You're making the assumption that you know who is good and who is bad in the situation going on very little information. See you're assuming he is credible even with the misuse of a firearm. He certainly does look like a drug dealer, so I had some fun with it😉. At the very least he's a complete jackass for shooting at an inanimate object. Nothing will change that.
By the way, if you don't want to raise children, don't have children. If she has kids one day, her responsibility to them will be the same.
Queen of Spades
macrumors 68030
My problem wasn't that the notebook was hers, my problem was with his mode of communication. Shooting 9 bullets through a laptop because you child has behaved selfishly and immaturely makes it really easy to see where the attitude comes from.
No one said he had to be perfect, but he probably should have exercised better judgment before humiliating his child to the public, and also setting a bad example about how to deal with conflicts in the home.
That's just it, it wasn't a choice between shooting a laptop or hitting a child. He had any number of other options he could have used to deal with the situation. I don't believe his actions were solely for the benefit of his child. If they were, he wouldn't have recorded them with a message to the world and put it on YouTube.
Children's behaviors aren't randomly assigned by the kid fairy, they're a result of the parenting and nurturing received. So this guy should probably take a look in the mirror before he loads his gun again.
renewed
macrumors 68040
I'm torn.
In one way I think it was kind of cool what he did. Maybe drastic times call for drastic measures. I'm sure this opened her eyes, to what I'm not sure.
In another I think it was too much. I read in the comments he should of given the laptop to someone who could use it and appreciate it. I think this would be a good idea. Tell her if she wants a laptop again she can buy it when she can work. Then let her use the family computer with child blocks on it for school work etc.
In one way I think it was kind of cool what he did. Maybe drastic times call for drastic measures. I'm sure this opened her eyes, to what I'm not sure.
In another I think it was too much. I read in the comments he should of given the laptop to someone who could use it and appreciate it. I think this would be a good idea. Tell her if she wants a laptop again she can buy it when she can work. Then let her use the family computer with child blocks on it for school work etc.
wonderspark
macrumors 68040
Thomas Veil
macrumors 68030
No...nor oversimplifying.
I already said that.
Frankly, posting a complaining message to a group of friends on Facebook is a heckuva lot more mature than shooting up someone's laptop and then posting that to the internet.
I kindof agree here. But what I haven't seen anybody grouse about is the permanence of this stunt. Once it's wild in the the internet, it's forever.
I don't necessarily have a problem with the sentiment, or even the firearm involved. The child's action probably needed a response of some sort. Parents have to lay down the law sometimes. Some sort of humiliation may have even been appropriate. But part of parenting is that the good times are supposed to overshadow the bad times... You take the proper corrective action, the kid is punished, and then you rebuild. A relationship based on love has to be able to get back to positive emotions.
With this video gone viral, the genie's never going back in the bottle. It's a shame, because just when the girl's gotten un-grounded and is starting to get less pissed at her dad, this video's going to rear its ugly head. And then the resentment will return. This short-sighted dad not only shot the laptop, he shot himself in the foot... 🙄
scottness
macrumors 65816
Good point. I think if I were him, I would still do itjust not post online.
I might have used a shotgun instead also; would like to see what buckshot would do to a laptop. Or have it flung up in the air so I could try a little skeet shooting with a laptop that would have been way more fun.
I've already expressed my view, the short of which is: the worst thing he did was psychological intimidation by way of the gun. Going along with that vein, I ask those who think he was not out of order: what would have been too much?
I don't mean to start an argument on all the things he possibly could have done because that's a difficult conversation to have, but in terms of what he did, which was to videotape himself shooting her computer: if that was not crossing the line, what would have been?
For example, if instead of videotaping himself doing it, he did the exact same thing in his daughter's presencewould that have been going too far? I think that does change the situation a lot. In a live situation where there are two people, and one has a gun who is shooting a prized possession, there is an obvious opportunity for escalation.
What if he shot a gun into the air? What if he shot it at the ground toward her feet? What if he had used a silencer?
Personally, if someone ever showed me a video of themselves shooting a piece of property of mine, I would be afraid for my life. To me, the message is, "I'm unpredictable, and I use firearms." I would not stay in that vicinity if this were me, but we've already established that there are cultural differences at play.
But I am just wondering if this is not crossing the line, what variation of his actions would you find intimidating toward your safety? Also, if this is a normal thing to do, would you find it normal for the daughter to respond in kind and use a gun to shoot one of his possessions as retribution? That would actually not be escalating the situation in the way the father did. He went from her expressing her feelings to shooting an expensive object. If she were to continue his pattern of escalation, the results would be tragic. I happen to think they already are, but . . .
I don't mean to start an argument on all the things he possibly could have done because that's a difficult conversation to have, but in terms of what he did, which was to videotape himself shooting her computer: if that was not crossing the line, what would have been?
For example, if instead of videotaping himself doing it, he did the exact same thing in his daughter's presencewould that have been going too far? I think that does change the situation a lot. In a live situation where there are two people, and one has a gun who is shooting a prized possession, there is an obvious opportunity for escalation.
What if he shot a gun into the air? What if he shot it at the ground toward her feet? What if he had used a silencer?
Personally, if someone ever showed me a video of themselves shooting a piece of property of mine, I would be afraid for my life. To me, the message is, "I'm unpredictable, and I use firearms." I would not stay in that vicinity if this were me, but we've already established that there are cultural differences at play.
But I am just wondering if this is not crossing the line, what variation of his actions would you find intimidating toward your safety? Also, if this is a normal thing to do, would you find it normal for the daughter to respond in kind and use a gun to shoot one of his possessions as retribution? That would actually not be escalating the situation in the way the father did. He went from her expressing her feelings to shooting an expensive object. If she were to continue his pattern of escalation, the results would be tragic. I happen to think they already are, but . . .