how do i tell my girlfriend she's Fat without hurting her feelings...

[Lau]

No no, this kind of sex is far better!

Its a joke!

But now we all know how long Next Tuesday struggles away sweatily for.

 

[arkitect]

But now we all know how long Next Tuesday struggles away sweatily for.

These forums are a minefield of information.

 

[Next Tuesday]

That plan could go horribly awry…

I guess if one includes the time you need to get "up and ready"…


Its a joke!

Thats true.....86 that idea..

 

[Melrose]

heres a few choices.
A. Get your "unit" tattooed to look like a twinkie(she will spend hours sweating tryin to get it)

Haha you said twinkie.

 

[0098386]

So people who don't want kids or who "want" to abuse their partner want a fat one, and everyone else doesn't?

I very much doubt this is about health though.

Not at all, that's what the etc encompassed.

Some people chose partners who they think will make good parents to their children.
Some people chose partners to replace a lost parent.
Some people chose partners who they can control and abuse (I was specifically thinking about 'feeders' here)
And all the others that I can't think of. Everyone has their reasons for picking a partner is all I'm saying. But from what I've read and from just personal experience the people I know go for those who they think will make healthy kids.

On a side note I've always wanted to try a Twinkie. Are they elongated profiteroles?

 

[leekohler]

LOL.

Not IME, perhaps I've just known men with stamina in my time, besides why on earth would a male orgasm stop activities from continuing? I've never quite understood this.

Me neither. You just go again. I don't understand why that's an issue for so many guys. It doesn't take that long to get warmed up again.

On a side note I've always wanted to try a Twinkie. Are they elongated profiteroles?

Don't. Let yourself die without ever having been defiled by a Twinkie. Those things are disgusting.

 

[Consultant]

Cook healthy food and eat low calorie. Easiest way.
If you eat balanced diet with lots of fiber and moderate exercise it's extremely hard to gain weight or stay fat.

Bicyling is great way to burn calaries and it's low impact. Helps to get a speedometer to see how fast you are going.

Apparently, you burn off 900 calories an hour by having sex!
I suggest you hump the pain away...

I hope this helps?

Depends but not that much. I think it's more like 100 calorie per hour on average. But she could go on top.

*pffft*

That may well be… except that most straight men only last a massive 4 minutes.
An hour?
Sorry but that calls for a LOL.

Actually the average is 20 minutes for US people.
Some people do go a lot longer. ahem.

 

[Mord]

On a side note I've always wanted to try a Twinkie. Are they elongated profiteroles?

They're pants, I bought one from cybercandy in Covent Gardens for lulz a couple of years ago and was rather disappointed, if you ever make it to the shop spend your cash on more interesting international confectionary.

Me neither. You just go again. I don't understand why that's an issue for so many guys. It doesn't take that long to get warmed up again.

I always assumed it was some kind of media propagated myth.

 

[tvp]

WOW, thank you guys so much... we're both 21, and yeah it all happened as she went to college, she used to be in the dance team until she injured her ankle... after surgery she has dance but not on the same level, i believe this might have affected her in a great way as dancing is her passion. Thats why i kinda don't want her to run... kinda worried... i think i'll try biking or swimming... a long with a "healthy eating" i've gained some pounds myself hehe, but nothing noticeable.. i weigh 140lbs, pretty much a skeleton lol. I've heard her say something about "my bones are big" hehe which is something i've never believed to be true in anyone . you guys have given me some great advice and make me laugh in the process as well! thanks again

Jin

I think I can relate to her situation. I was an active athlete (hockey, horseback riding and soccer) and completely shattered my ankle. After three surgeries I can no longer get my ankle into a hockey skate and I can't do any type of impact activities like running. It sets you into quite the slump. I gained a ton of weight, not good! My boyfriend was supportive at first but without him even telling me I could see that he wasn't liking it. But even with him hinting that we do different activities etc. I still didn't want to. Only I was finally able to realize the path I was heading down and fix it. I agree with the person that suggested a Wii and Wii Fit. I love mine, sure it's not going to kill as many calories as going to the gym and doing cardio/weights, etc. for an hour, but it's a good start. Also there are some fitness DVD's out there that are really fun. Carmen Electra does a exotic dancing type one, it's a fantastic workout (legs and abs hurt for days!) and it's really fun. Tell her you think it'll give her some fun moves in the bedroom or something and see if she buys into it.

 

[dinaluvsApple]

i suggest u sneak some clenbuterol into all her food and drinks.

 

[leekohler]

I always assumed it was some kind of media propagated myth.

I think you could be right about that. I've only run into that a few times. Usually, whoever I've been with is more than ready to keep going. I certainly am most of the time.

 

[MarkCollette]

and what shape is YOUR body in, boyfriend?
telling her is not helping her. instead, tell her (only if you really mean it) that you want her to be healthy so you can grow old together. then, go for a walk. hold hands. exercise is good for both of you. you can work your way up to the gym later. Encourage healthier eating. eat together. find out why she is stress eating. Ignore that other guy, he is so wrong. Have sex more often! make sure its fun for her. with a little of the right kind of encouragement and reward, girls can accomplish alot. Do it together, and when you reach the goal, treat yourself to a fun weekend someplace you can show off that sexy slim body.

my kid sis was super thin (stressedout sick thin) when she met her boyfriend. He is a super buff athlete. over a year, she slowly climbed back up to her normal weight, then got stressed out over life, ate late, and put on 30 lbs...she knew she was getting fat, and cried about it to me. so this is what he did, and now she is losing weight, will go to the gym, and will be bod beautimus when they go on their honeymoon in Sept.

100% agree. It's not about pressuring, or even enlightening her for the need to change. It's about inspiring her, based on changes you make in your own life. Took me quite a while to learn this. The funny thing about setting a good example, is when they surpass you

Injury's a touch root cause to affect, because there may be fear of reinjury, or impeding the healing process. But it should be possible to find physical activities that don't stress that specific part of the body, that you both will enjoy.

I think I can relate to her situation. I was an active athlete (hockey, horseback riding and soccer) and completely shattered my ankle. After three surgeries I can no longer get my ankle into a hockey skate and I can't do any type of impact activities like running. It sets you into quite the slump. I gained a ton of weight, not good! My boyfriend was supportive at first but without him even telling me I could see that he wasn't liking it. But even with him hinting that we do different activities etc. I still didn't want to. Only I was finally able to realize the path I was heading down and fix it. I agree with the person that suggested a Wii and Wii Fit. I love mine, sure it's not going to kill as many calories as going to the gym and doing cardio/weights, etc. for an hour, but it's a good start. Also there are some fitness DVD's out there that are really fun. Carmen Electra does a exotic dancing type one, it's a fantastic workout (legs and abs hurt for days!) and it's really fun. Tell her you think it'll give her some fun moves in the bedroom or something and see if she buys into it.

Hey, have you done physiotherapy? It can make quite a difference in the recovery time, over simple rest.

I think you could be right about that. I've only run into that a few times. Usually, whoever I've been with is more than ready to keep going. I certainly am most of the time.

But don't you want to just cuddle for a bit, after? Bask in the moment?

 

[Keniff]

*pffft*

That may well be… except that most straight men only last a massive 4 minutes.
An hour?
Sorry but that calls for a LOL.

OMFG!!

4 minutes?!?!?!

Well, if you're a woman, then I feel sorry for you, as you've obviously never been with a real man!
And, if you're a man, then I feel sorry for you, as you obviously aren't a real man!

MASSIVE LOL @ U!

 

[MarkCollette]

OMFG!!

4 minutes?!?!?!

Well, if you're a woman, then I feel sorry for you, as you've obviously never been with a real man!
And, if you're a man, then I feel sorry for you, as you obviously aren't a real man!

MASSIVE LOL @ U!

That's why I only have sex once a year, on daylight savings, so I can last an hour and four minutes.

 

[arkitect]

OMFG!!

4 minutes?!?!?!

Well, if you're a woman, then I feel sorry for you, as you've obviously never been with a real man!
And, if you're a man, then I feel sorry for you, as you obviously aren't a real man!

MASSIVE LOL @ U!

Judging by your reaction, I'd say I was correct.


I love it when I'm right.

 

[obeygiant]

Found this at askmen.com. A few ways to break it to her gently.

1- "I don't like the way that outfit looks on you anymore."
Every woman has a go-to getup. If you don't know it, you don't know her well enough to discuss her flabby stomach. The only thing that could ever change the way an outfit looks is the way it fits. Tell her you aren't sure why it looks odd, suggest a looser knit, and watch her forever skip the nachos with cheese.

2- "I can't get over how fat I feel."
Women have been commiserating with each other for eons about the thickness of their thighs. If you launch a pity party of your own about how heavy you feel, and let her know at every turn, she'll become fat-obsessed by osmosis. Women have been doing it to each other since the dawn of public washrooms.

3- "Your friend isn't nearly as attractive since she gained that weight."
Be careful. Delivery is everything. Pick her homeliest friend and you can let your most outrageous BS fly. Pick an attractive pal and you'll be explaining your wandering eye until you give her a ring. Focus on the improbable target, and she'll be thinking that if you find her bookworm buddy hefty, perhaps a diet should be on her docket.

4- "I have a new female trainer at the gym."
She won't suggest fewer trips to the gym, but it will drive her bonkers to think that another woman is spotting your squat thrusts. She'll sign up and be there within 24 hours just to keep an eye on you.

5- "The saleswoman said it was for smaller women."
If you want your girl to shed some baby fat, spend a couple of bucks on a nice little fashion piece a couple of sizes out of her reach. If she thinks she is thin in your eyes, and the only thing telling her otherwise is a piece of clothing, she'll work morning, noon and night to fit into that cursed thing.

6- "Let's help each other lose a couple of pounds?"
Let's face it. If you tell your girlfriend to lose some weight, she'll withdraw your all-access pass to her wonderful folds. But an honest commitment to work together to become fitter and shed some unwanted girth can only be met with the excitement that your investment in her is the same as what she is willing to invest in you. Losing weight is no small task. Make her sure you're worth it.

Otherwise its "MAN THE HARPOONS!"

 

[leekohler]

But don't you want to just cuddle for a bit, after? Bask in the moment?

Yep- and then you start all over again. It doesn't take long. Or you do something for your partner in the meantime. It's silly just to have that be the end of it.

Oh- and just where have you been, sir?

 

[tvp]

Hey, have you done physiotherapy? It can make quite a difference in the recovery time, over simple rest.

I've done a total of 18 months of physio. About 6 months worth after each operation. Unfortunately the bone I broke is necrotic and very weak. But I was able to get a great personal trainer who works with my physical therapist to create low impact exercises so I was able to get back into shape again.

 

[MarkCollette]

Yep- and then you start all over again. It doesn't take long. Or you do something for your partner in the meantime. It's silly just to have that be the end of it.

Oh- and just where have you been, sir?

Does alternating between squeezing the life out of them, and drooling on their neck, count? Because that's all I've got for post-play reperatoire.

Oh, I lurk just about every day. Almost as if I was ... stalking you

I've done a total of 18 months of physio. About 6 months worth after each operation. Unfortunately the bone I broke is necrotic and very weak. But I was able to get a great personal trainer who works with my physical therapist to create low impact exercises so I was able to get back into shape again.

Damn, that sounds like quite the long road. Sounds like you're in a better stretch of it now though

 

[leekohler]

Does alternating between squeezing the life out of them, and drooling on their neck, count? Because that's all I've got for post-play reperatoire.

That can certainly be part of it. Unless you're asleep when it's happening. Then it doesn't count.

Oh, I lurk just about every day. Almost as if I was ... stalking you

Thought so. Friggin' Canadians.

My visit to Toronto a few weeks ago was great. One of these days, I'm gonna make all you pretty Canadians come to Chicago for a visit.

 

[bearbear]

I would just dump her. The lack of motivation/self-awareness is just a huge turn off. Let some other guy figure her out...

 

[iBlue]

I would just dump her. The lack of motivation/self-awareness is just a huge turn off. Let some other guy figure her out...

Also a huge turn off, unnecessary misogyny and lack of consideration for someone you are in a relationship with.


I hope for every man who thinks this way that you find yourselves with a big disgusting belly and have a woman scrape you off the bottom of her shoe like the revolting slobs you are.

Or was this just another flippant comment among many in this thread because some of you don't feel the need to extend courtesy to a woman struggling with herself? Does that make you feel real big and clever?

Some of the comments in this thread are astounding (some of which have thankfully been edited/deleted). All this "real man" bullshyte and macho ego-stroking... methinks the boys doth protest too much. Go masturbate your masculinity on your own time because it's idiotic to read. WTF is wrong with some of you?

 

[bearbear]

Excessive weight gain is 99% of the time just a lack of willpower. This will inevitably carry over to other areas of her life and the downward spiral begins.
I don't want to settle, so why keep her around? Life's too short.

Obviously this hit a nerve with you (one can hypothesize why, ahem), but there's no need to sling insults around.

 

[iBlue]

Excessive weight gain is 99% of the time just a lack of willpower. This will inevitably carry over to other areas of her life and the downward spiral begins.
I don't want to settle, so why keep her around? Life's too short.

Obviously this hit a nerve with you (one can hypothesize why, ahem), but there's no need to sling insults around.

I suppose I did sling it hard your way but it was most of it was meant in general to numerous rude posts in this thread. It's a primarily male forum and I probably got a contact high from all that testosterone, you see.

And you may have hit a nerve but you hypothesize/imply incorrectly. I'm hardly what anyone would call overweight, I just didn't like the tone of some of the posts in this thread.

 

[waiwai]

Well, we've been together for a while and since then she's gained some weight.... but to the point it's not cool anymore, i want to motivate her to go to the gym or something for her own good u know... but then again, she's very emotional... as gentle as i would try to be she'll be like IM FAT? WHATTT /SLAP/ and not talk to me for a bit... so i need some counseling! thanks guys

Jin

Sorry man, from my interpretation of your post you can't stand girls with meat on them, you've just worded it less obvious so people don't think you are a jerk at the get go.

If you love this girl for who she is and not just for physical attraction, it should never have crossed your mind. If she is unhealthy, not by ur observation, but through professional observation from a physician, then you can go on and let her know... to try eating healthier and/or doing some exercise.

Best way to motivate your significant other is to take their hand and go at it together. Just telling her to go exercise because she's gotten fat is not enough... In fact that shows very little effort and care on your part. Going the extra mile and exercising with her will make her feel less embarassed/guilty. She won't throw a fit or slap yo face if you go with her. She will however if u just sit back and relax while she goes at it alone.

Say... "Hun, I've got us a couples pass at the local gym so we can workout together. It would be fun and we can both get healthier/fit." If your pockets got holes in them... Instead of going to gym ask her to go jogging in the park with you. There are so many ways to go at it without inadvertently offending an overly emotional partner.