The deleting of posts that are "collateral damage" to the deletion of moderated posts doesn't actually work that way. The "button" that deletes the post(s) doesn't necessarily have your post(s) at hand, at least not in the way implied by your description. Or it doesn't necessarily have only your post(s).
If you receive a Reminder or Warning as a Conversation (Private Message), which typically quotes your entire post, then that means that your post was moderated, and wasn't just collateral damage.
Honestly, it will be simpler if you ask us to find a deleted post of yours, which I hope would only happen occasionally.
The alternative of sending you a Notification with the entire content of your deleted post(s), or even a link, would require substantial changes to the XenForo software the forums use, and that's not likely to happen. The moderators don't have the ability to change XenForo.
If you can just identify the thread, that's a good starting point. If we then find that a dozen of your posts were deleted there, we can ask you to help narrow it down.
If you receive a Reminder or Warning as a Conversation (Private Message), which typically quotes your entire post, then that means that your post was moderated, and wasn't just collateral damage.
Honestly, it will be simpler if you ask us to find a deleted post of yours, which I hope would only happen occasionally.
The alternative of sending you a Notification with the entire content of your deleted post(s), or even a link, would require substantial changes to the XenForo software the forums use, and that's not likely to happen. The moderators don't have the ability to change XenForo.
If you can just identify the thread, that's a good starting point. If we then find that a dozen of your posts were deleted there, we can ask you to help narrow it down.