I Don't Care How Many Models Apple Will Debut.
No Rear Touch ID Please.
Oh please. What's it matter? Whatever Apple rolls out will become the new perfection. Cue: "shut up and take my money."
Last week had a thread with many sounding like they were not buying if the new phone had that "dreadful" vertically-oriented camera cutout. Now that we've all seen more rumors increasingly implying that it will indeed be that way, that sentiment seems to be rapidly evaporating.
Give us about 5 more rumors that keep implying the rear touch ID and the sentiment will shift from "awkward", "stupid", "unusable" toward being perfectly fine... even more useful... even preferable.
Apple could do a headphone jack and shift it... or the camera... or the battery out to a dongle and this crowd will detest the idea at first rumor but then spin it as genius once we believe Apple is really going to do it.
You know how this works around here. Rumor anything different than what Apple is doing now and it's generally a stupid concept that "99% don't want", blah, blah, blah. However, give us a fairly consistent stream of rumors and all we need is to start believing Apple is going to do it to dramatically shift our sentiment from disgust to adulation.
We're the same crowd that thoroughly, thoroughly ridiculed bigger-screen phones when Apple clung to 4" as the perfect size. Remember those early rumors of bigger-screen iPhones? Remember those being ridiculed per "one handed use", "pants with bigger pockets", etc. Remember 1080p proclaiming in every thread how there was no "plus" iPhone? And then, the rumors kept piling up ("it's kind of growing on me") and then Apple rolls them out and it's "shut up and take my money" and "best iPhone ever." Our hands didn't dynamically grow. I'm still to see the plethora of pants with bigger pockets.
🙄
We know how this goes. Apple could roll out this next iPhone only in Pepto Pink, made of rusty razor blades, in a triangular shape and we'll gush the genius of it as our hands bleed from holding it... and we attempt to adapt to a trianglular phone.
😉
Apple doesn't have a "normal cycle". Our monkey brains have evolved to see patterns everywhere, so we freaked out last year when the iPhone 7 looked too much like the iPhone 6s, when all that is holy in the universe told us that it should have been a complete redesign as Apple had done since the dawn of time--or since 2012 when the pattern became apparent. We freaked out in 2011 about that pattern, because the fifth iPhone should have been called the iPhone 5, and Apple called it the freakin' iPhone 4s!
Are you trying to use logic around here?
😱
We're also the crowd that actually believes this release has features held back for it because Apple wanted to do something extra special for a 10th anniversary... meanwhile ignoring the non-event of a much more monumental anniversary last April 1.
