Eddy Cue Previews 'Planet of the Apps' at Code Conference: Non-Linear Viewing, Weekly Release, First Trailer and More

Christ Almighty. I was resisting the temptation to watch those...now I wished I hadn't. What a pile of utter garbage. Sadly, these days, under Gormless Tim, it's not surprising in the least.

 

I'm also wondering this. I don't think anybody's ever said, "hey, I'd love to watch TV shows from a music streaming service!"

 

I don't use drugs and I don't watch tv. But if I do decide to watch this show, I think I might need the drugs.

 

I don't know how many consumers will want to watch the app development process.

Plus, why Apple Music? Please don't do what MTV did and do something totally different from actual music.

 

So far there is no indication that Gwyneth Paltrow knows anything other than acting...and just barely at that. This is the woman who gave out such appalling dangerous advice (to hawk a product or start some weird trend or something) that a gynecologist felt compelled to speak out against it in the most harsh and uncompromising terms.

I haven't seen will.i.am succeed at anything in the tech sector yet. He seems to have imagined that he has, but so far his products have gotten laughed at and disappeared from the scene.

Jessica Alba's Honest line seems to be doing well despite revelations that many of her environmentally friendly ingredients are in fact, not. She might have legitimate business acumen, but it's too soon to tell and it's hard to determine how much oversight she actually has vs. being a figurehead with more savvy people making the decisions behind the scenes. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt. But I would not seek her out as a mentor for apps, as there is nothing about her business or her experiences to indicate she has a clue that could apply to the world of the app developer. I'm going to assume she's just here to act, to play the part and say what is scripted for her.

I don't know who the fourth guy is, honestly. I had to look him up. He is the only one with legit credentials for this gig, based on what I read.

 

Technically, it's a service, not a product. And based on what I've seen of it so far, it's not a very good service -- neither its technical implementation nor the served content are convincing or of attractive enough quality.

But there was a point in time when Apple was very good at developing hardware products and even some of the software coming directly from Apple was worth mentioning. I guess the OP had that time in mind...

 

I can think of so many things Eddie Cue's department should have done before entertaining Planet of the Apps.

- Feature parity in the storefronts on the various platforms. For example iBooks iOS lacks ability to add items to wish list while iBooks Mac has ability.

- Integration of Push Notification system into all store fronts. Is there a Beats 1 show you like? A push notification can let you know when there is a new episode available. Normally rent the iTunes Film Rental of the Week? A push notification can tell you when the latest one if available. How about an item on your wish list going on sale? A push notification advising you might lead to you buying it.

- More contextually aware storefronts. I'm an American living abroad. In my podcast app I have some 30 odd subscriptions and all of them are in English and nearly all of them American shows. Yet the directory is always showing the local stuff which I have no interest in. Same with iBooks, every book I purchased has been in English, perhaps show me those over books in another language.

- Expand Siri-Remote availability in more countries. Seriously typing on the Apple TV keyboard sucks. I want to talk to Siri like the device was marketed. Also infuriating I can't even use it in English because of my region.

- Make an official game controller for the Apple TV and snatch the casual gaming market which is there for the taking.

- Break up iTunes!!! A podcast app, a music app, a film & tv app. Are you getting it?

And if we have to do TV content inside of a music app why not shows about music instead of apps?

- Buy the rights to the Unplugged named and resurrect the series.

- Do a series of documentaries on artists or genres.

- Show live concerts and festivals (and yes I know they show the Apple Music festival)

 

That is so spot-on about the motivations and curation of Apple's entertainment endeavors. Eddy Cue wants to feel "hip", but his conception of "hip-ness" is Metallica, Gwyneth Paltrow, and Shark Tank. It's transparent. It's dated.

I think this is going to end up having an alienating effect on young consumers, particularly the ones who are culturally relevant.

 

Oh my God, that is horrific. I've got several relatives who died in WWII or who had served and since passed of old age who are probably pranking the spirit of Steve Jobs in the afterlife for that film.

Cringeworthy does not even begin to describe it. I don't remember that film. Thank goodness. But thanks for resurrecting it and bringing some perspective back to this thread. Yes, apparently extreme derpiness is in Apple's DNA after all.

However, that was the early 1980's and young Steve Jobs. Mature and wiser Steve Jobs would probably have gone back in time and kicked his own butt hard and repeatedly for that, if he could.

We need these guys to make that film and the new Planet of the Apps bearable.

 

I think most of the Apple execs are like that and are out of touch. I think of them as " Try Hards ". They fear being irrelevant and believe staying on the fashion catwalk would make them 'hip'.

At least, Metallica is still relevant and cool. I grew up with their music and have nothing but respect for them. They rank up there with the greats.

I think they're trying too hard to be the next M-tv when that's not going to be possible. They will NEVER, EVER, EVER be able to touch what M-tv pulled off in the 80s. M-tv got it right back in the day as I remember it. Cue and the Beats 1 folks are total fools.

Putting that tv show in Apple Music is the most boneheaded thing I've ever seen and that should have been on Apple TV, not Music. Apple Music has nothing to do with that show.

 

"He later clarified that shows on Apple Music don't have to be about music, similar to how MTV programming isn't always about music."

which is why it sucks so bad.

 

Nope

 

Oh, its Shark Tank for apps. Why did I even think that this might be an original show... What a waste.

 

Sounds spot on, you'd get my vote...

 

I had YouTube opened to view the movie KDarling had posted and I saw one in which Steve Jobs was talking to Ted Koppel in 1981 about computers and how his vision of them was as tools to amplify man's inherent abilities to make us the most efficient at what we can do. That was his vision for computing into the 21st century.

And here we are, in the 21st century with these amazing devices, and all we can really do on most of the ones Apple now sells best is watch crap. And now really the crappiest of crap...from Apple. So yeah, I wonder myself.

To be fair, Steve Jobs set Apple down this path himself when he got Apple into the music business and died while declaring he had cracked TV...apparently without having left Tim with a detailed instruction set on implementing whatever this vision entailed.

Edit to clarify watching crap is not all we can do on our Apple products. But emphasizing content consumption seems to be Apple's focus.

 

RE: Apple's "1944" Mac promo video...

Close. It was an internal promotion video, meant to motivate the sales force at the annual convention.

Apparently the sales group needed a presentation. They started talking about how the Mac had established a beach head in offices, but needed to fight harder to get more business sales away from the enemy IBM.

The battle simile to D-Day grabbed them, Jobs got excited over the idea, and the film was made and shown in October 1984 at the convention in Hawaii.

Then it disappeared for almost 30 years. Btw, Jobs was only 29 at the time.

 

Sad!

 

I will admit that first "preview" was an hour of boring talking heads.

Being a developer it makes me wonder or realize how boring programming really is.

The best part is no one really cares or expects you to dress well.

 

"Watch the journey unfold...on Apple Music".

Hmmm, just like the iTunes moniker needs to go because iTunes encompasses much more than music (and has for years), it seems like Apple is trying to cram stuff that doesn't have anything to do with music into Apple Music. 2017 needs to be the year that Apple rebrands its services with names that make sense.

Edit: In the Code Conference interview at 1:36, Eddy Cue looks like a damn fool saying "You'll be able to see it on Apple Music...it'll be exclusive to Apple Music." The show has nothing to do with music aside from the fact that the show includes will.i.am and Gwyneth Paltrow.

 

So they have all of these resources and opportunities, and they decide to go with this reality TV tripe with Planet of the Apps. Disappointing.

Planet of the Apps could have been something so much better. It could have been a educational, inspiring, interesting view of how apps get developed, and the people involved.

 

Most people I know don't care about music and the artists behind it. They just want to download the music and listen to it.

That's what you sound like to me. I don't watch the Voice and other singing competitions but I know that millions do. Millions also watch Shark Tank which this also reminds me of. I think the only thing holding this show from truly big ratings is the fact that it's locked to the Apple Music platform.

--- Post Merged, Feb 14, 2017 ---

How can it be copying Shark Tank when it's clearly copying The Voice?

 

When these "shows" bomb horribly (which is almost certain), then can we finally get rid of Cue!?! Ugh...

 

This.

It's the extremely wide variety of pitched products/services that helps make Shark Tank entertaining. Apps are just... well... apps. And Shark Tank is done after the pitch so you don't have to worry about a guest wearing out their welcome. With Planet of the Apps you have a pitch to the celebs, then a development phase, then another pitch to actual business people, so not only do you have to find interesting app ideas you also have to find devs that can carry a show too.

Maybe the show will turn out to be good, but that trailer is unbearable.

 

Planet of the Apps looks an interesting show. Dragons Den meets The Voice.

 

Ten bucks says Apple uses the Carpool Karaoke show to introduce their stupid car in 5 years.