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Think she moved on, feel awful
- Thread starter Hieveryone
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People don’t have to conform to society but then they can’t complain about it bc they choose to be different
You can't complain about something if you're not a part of it? What if you aren't a part of it because your complaints?
You are certainly far away from what any modern society would deem an example to aim for. By your logic don’t complain.
Again, when the right one comes along it will be obvious.
Reminds me of a woman I used to go out with years ago. She could literally transform herself from an average almost homely looking woman that you wouldn’t bat an eye at if you saw her on the street to an absolute stunner. And she could do it at will. Anytime.
I never asked her, (and I never would ask her because I just assume count my blessings) but I’m sure some of it was probably her make up mastery and some of it was her choice of outfits. As far as I was concerned that was the closest I ever got to meeting a walking talking chameleon. It was almost like seeing two different women and I had to wonder which one I was getting that day.
The main thing I learned from that relationship, all in all, was that she knew exactly what she was doing.
They ALL know exactly what they’re doing and they ALL are ten times smarter than the men who do so much to be with them (including me)
One component.
It is only a "major component" if that is the sole lens by which you choose to judge the worth of a person.
Only if you choose to move in the circles that value superficiality.
You said society is superficial.
However, some of us choose to inhabit parts of it that are not superficial, because we place a greater value on other things that matter, such as a person's character.
You do know, don't you, that it is possible (not easy, mind you) to try to bring about change? Social, societal, political, cultural, economic change?
I would characterize appearance as the bait, and personality as the hook.
And OH BOY do men fall for that bait.
I am probably the worst and have suffered A LOT as a result.
These women are impossible y’all.
They choose to fall for what you term "that bait", above all, if this is the sole criterion by which they judge women.
You choose to be the worst because you value little or nothing else in a woman apart from appearance.
And I would argue that your suffering is entirely self generated, and utterly self-indulgent.
The sole common factor in all of your "impossible" so-called relationships is you.
When a man decides to frame his previous relationships as "crazy exes", or "materialistic exes", or "impossible", he is either repeating the same cycles of behaviour of attraction to the same type of person, endlessly, and eternally, or, failing to realise that the one common denominator in all of these relationships is himself, and that maybe a bit of learning or self examination might be in order.
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What would happen if you went out with someone who you rated as an 8?
What would a woman rate you? Based on your posts here you aren’t a 10.
What would a woman rate you? Based on your posts here you aren’t a 10.
Isn’t it a typical definition of insanity to repeat the same process over and over while expecting different results? Food for thought.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with pursuing what attracts you, but you do understand that in a relationship appearance is the icing, but it is the underlying cake (personality) that ultimately makes or breaks the relationship? Sure, use appearance as a filter, but also realize that if your filter is too limited, that you will miss some human gems. Because unlike a gem whose value is based solely on appearance, human value, what nourishes us most, is mostly based on personality.
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I've navigated relationships with some beautiful and smart women (that would leave you a stuttering goon ...) without any games, with clear understanding of how the relationship worked, without being - as implied by the quote - "tricked" in any way. Confidence, respect, no undercurrent of "paying for the women", real women respond to that.
Well, that, and my devilishly handsome good looks
Hey at least you didn't get stuck in a relationship with a BPD for 4 years, help her through the death of her mother, then have her blame you for all the misery in her life, (which goes back to her childhood) break up, and then not even 2 months later she's with some new guy going on Hawaiian vacations together. That does wonders for your self esteem.
That being said, enjoy being single. It gives you perspective on what's most important in life... you. Not trying to keep some entitled broad happy all the time. I learned that the hard way.
That being said, enjoy being single. It gives you perspective on what's most important in life... you. Not trying to keep some entitled broad happy all the time. I learned that the hard way.
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Well apparently I don’t have to be a 10 to date them then
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Omg dude I’m so glad you posted this!!
I dated a girl with BPD too! It was the worst experience of my life dating wise.
Maybe the girl I’m dating now has BPD i don’t know but if she does then it’s mild to moderate. She does similar things like my bpd ex but not to the same degree.
Stay strong bro. It can be very tough out there.
Then why do your dates have to be a 10?
I have no doubts I’m “crazy” haha.
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Because they’re pretty and are willing to date me so why wouldn’t I?
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Yeah I agree with all of this. You have to still talk to the person and get a long with them and cultivate a partnership together.
and how’s that working out for you??
What if these so-called 10s stop dating you altogether? Is it down to 9s or will you keep pushing the 10s?
It’s a lot of fun. The drama is pretty crazy but i enjoy tbh. The highs and the lows. I crave it and don’t think I would be happy if I found something stable
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I’ll take the maximum I can get. If 7’s wanna date fine. But if I can get a 10, even better.
yes its a choice. Nobody is saying you have date a 10 but if you’re lucky enough I say go for it
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it’s not really suffering I mean I enjoy the highs and lows ya know? Anything less would just be boring
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and yea I definitely repeat. People tell me that all the girls I’ve dated look exactly the same haha. I have my type and don’t tend to stray
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But if I ever got tired of it I could try to find a girl with different value ya know?
someone who isn’t flashy. But for now I say party on. If can marry this girl my life would forever be fun despite the ups and downs.
one minute it’s like “I can’t do this” and the next it’s like “this is the best girl I’ve ever met”
the volatility is insane
If you like it, then why on earth are you on here complaining about it????
Seriously, how old are you? I don't think you've ever answered that.
Afaik there's no such thing as "mild to moderate" when it comes to BPD, it's usually full blown, otherwise they're usually just depressed or manic depressive (bipolar). It's the female equivalent of antisocial personality disorder... something like 80/20 ratio of women to men having BPD, where it's the other way around for men regarding APD.
The sad thing about BPD is that there's no real established treatment for it other than generalized psychotherapy, but even then that has varying success rates. All you can do is avoid whoever you know that has it like the plague, or they will make your life miserable while using you to fulfill their emotional needs until they no longer value you, and then drop you to move onto their next victim.
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